[ cheers and applause its the rush of relaxation. Introducing the allnew lincoln corsair. Jimmy wow. Thank you very much, everybody hello. [ cheers and applause thank you so much, everybody and welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome to the tonight show. Youre here. [ cheers and applause thank you very much. Well, guys, today is super tuesday. Its such an important day for our country. Thats right, millions of americans went into the polls, stepped into a voting booth and went, eh, i guess. Dont get mad. Get e trade, dawg. [ laughter ] actually, people were pumped for today. Democrats havent been this excited since the 800 times President Trump was almost removed from office. [ laughter ] thats right, today was super tuesday. 14 states voted and over magnum ice cream double caramel. 1,300 delegates were up for grabs. And good news, once super tuesday is over, there is now in ice cream tubs and bars. Only eight more months until the election we do it every night. No every night. I live alone
Questions like, why has no one responded to my birthday evite . [ light laughter ] real easy, you just click yes or no [ light laughter ] a 30foothigh portion of president trumps border wall blew over yesterday and fell into mexico. [ laughter ] man, thats how rough things are right now. Even trumps wall is leaving the country. [ laughter and applause the New York Times [ cheers and applause the New York Times launched a quiz today to match readers with the democratic president ial candidates apparently, john delaney took the quiz and even he didnt get john delaney [ laughter ] the Border Patrol announced yesterday that it has discovered a 4,000 footlong tunnel going from mexico to the u. S. Which is 70 feet below ground and has a ventilation system, electrical cables, an elevator and rails for moving items said new yorkers, does it go to brooklyn . [ laughter and applause sounds amazing [ cheers and applause can we get that . Commerce secretary wilbur ross, this morning, claimed that
I dont know if i can handle all this fame. I mean, i always thought id want to be famous, but now that i am, i dont know if i like it. I mean, i probably cant even walk through this mall right now without people going, oh, my god, its the fingerbang guy oh, my god yeah, thats gonna suck. Yeah, i just want to be a normal kid again, have a normal life, and appreciate what i have. I think you boys are very smart for your age. Come on, ill buy you all an orange smoothie. I dont think they sell those anymore. Hey, cartman, do you think god is going to be mad at you for not making 10 million . Oh, screw god. Im not scared of him. Hes a pussy. You know im just kidding, right . From Comedy Centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with trevor noah. cheers and applause trevor welcome to the daily show, everybody. Thank you so much for tuning in. Thank you for coming out. Thank you so much for coming out. As always, im trevor noah. Our guest tonight, our guest tonight
Tonight, join jimmy and his guests Scarlett Johansson mayor Pete Buttigieg musical guest jim james, teddy abrams, the members of the louisville orchestra, and the legendary roots crew questlove 1140 jiy fallonand now, here he is, [ cheers and applause [ cheers and applause jimmy oh, my goodness. [ cheers and applause thank you very much. Oh thank you very much everybody. Thank you. Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome to the tonight show. Youre here. You made it. Rs a a show. Applause at show we have for you. Scarlett johansson is here [ cheers and applause we also have mayor Pete Buttigieg here. Steve yes [ cheers and applause jimmy it wasnt easy getting mayor pete here. First we had to work around his Crazy Campaign schedule, and then we needed his pents to sign the permission slip [ light laughter ] steve really jimmy but this is big. According to a new poll out today, mayor pete is surging in iowa [ cheers and applause he just passed Bernie Sanders, is now right behind joe biden and
Marvels movies and what we do in the shadows, a phenomenal film. Tonight hes here with a new comedy in which he plays, i want to get this right, adolph hitler. Taika waititi is joining us lets catch up on todays headlines. Lets start things off talking about the miracle of life and why its so creepy. A mysterious new organism they nicknamed it the blob, a yellow unicellular small living being, looks like a fungus but acts like an animal, that is 720 sexes, can move without legs or wings and can heal itself. Two blobs can transmit knowledge to each other. Experts call it one of natures mysteries. Trevor sounds like the beginning of a horror movie. Sounds like a news report everyone in the horror movie ignores ten minutes before the blob takes over the town. What does that mean that the blob has 720 different sexes . Did the blob say that . The scientists say, what are are you pronounce . The blob says, all of them people get stressed and say the yellow blob is going to take over the wor