[ laughter ] yeah [ cheers and applause thank you, wiping down doorknobs, for making me a group of sheep in northern realize for making me ireland recently crashed through realize that before i cleaned the window of a local bank and you, a total sorry. Wandered around the office thank you, wiping down when asked how many sheep were doorknobs, for making me realize that before this, i in there, the Bank Employees cleaned you a total of zero times. Fell asleep. [ laughter ] [ applause ] thank you, selfquarantine, for teaching me things i didnt [ cheers and applause know about myself, like how im unable to resist the urge to eat 12 cans of peaches thank you, cats on demand, and finally, a woman in North Carolina recently celebrated her 100th birthday by for now being on demand. Having herself arrested to in these crazy times, finally fulfill a lifelong dream a dose of sanity [ laughter ] [ cheers ] said police said the police, finally, thank you to all the tt maam, we would have done it w
Now now the selloff [ applause ] wasnt due entirely to coronavirus. It was also due in large part to war over oil prices launched by saudi arabia still, a l o understandably worried and while theres no reason to panic, governments across the world are taking extreme measures to mitigate the outbreak over the weekend, italy put millions of people on lockdown in regions hit hardest by the outbreak where people were rushing to catch the last trains leaving milan before the lockdown took effect officials in italy putting 16 Million People on lockdown. Now, thats a quarter of a countrys population video shows people rushing to catch the last train as it left northern italy seth this is what italians look like when theyre rushing [ laughter ] obviously [ cheers and applause i mean, obviously in italy, to run for a train is a fate worse than death [ laughter ] im shocked they didnt have cigarettes in one hand and aperol spritzes in the other i mean, if youve ever been to italy, you know that
Tonight, join jimmy and his guests Alex Rodriguez kj apa musical guest haim and featuring the legendary roots crew questlove 1221 steve and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause [ cheers and applause jimmy thank you very much. Hello. Thank you. [ cheers and applause welcome, everybody welcome, welcome, welcome to the tonight show. This is it youre here. [ cheers and applause fantastic. Well, you guys, it was a a Beautiful Day here in new york, with temperatures hitting 70 degrees [ cheers and applause jimmy it was great new yorkers were outside lathering themselves with sunscreen and purell it was amazing [ light laughter ] but today was nice but i cant wait for tomorrow when everyone shows up with a weird face mask tan. [ laughter ] thats right, these are fun times to do a show right now they really are. Just so everyone knows, in the event someone in the audience lightly coughs, the emergency exits are here, here and here. [ light laughter ] thank you very much. [ cheer
The stock market today suffered its worst day since 2008, while great person trump suffered his worst day he was at m. I. T. He taught at m. I. T. For, i think, a Record Number of years. He was a great super genius, since, i dont know, yesterday [ laughter ] dr. John trump i like this stuff. President Trumps White House i really get it. Social media director, this people are surprised that i weekend, shared a video of understand it. Former Vice President joe biden every one of these doctors said, that was edited so it appeared how do you know so much about this . Biden was saying, we can only maybe i have a natural ability maybe i should have done that reelect donald trump. Instead of running for president. They doctored a video to make seth yes yes, you should have joe biden look bad [ applause ] [ laughter ] you should have applied to that is so unnecessary medical school i mean, for real, here is how and you should have filmed the reactions of the faculty of that here is how he star
How senator sanders is now responding. Winter weather alert. The major coast to coast storm on the move right now. Slamming the west with heavy rain and snow. Now the midwest and northeast bracing. Airlines already offering waivers, the new timing and track. Kidnapping rescue. The 11yearold snatched on her way home from school and the alert drivers who spotted the car hours later helping police save her. And the 28yearold nfl star shocking fans, now the latest in a string of Young Athletes to leave the game. Why hes hanging up his cleats. And the prince goes public. Prince harry appearing for the First Time Since that bombshell announcement that he and meghan are stepping back from their royal duties. His new message this morning. And we do say good morning, america. It is a very busy thursday morning. Take a live look at the capitol. An historic day in the impeachment showdown about to begin. President trump is about to become the third president in American History to stand trial on