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Transcripts For KPIX The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20240714

Its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight uu. K. In the membrane. Plus, stephen welcomes Renee Zellweger Walton Goggins and a special appearance by new zealands Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern. Featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause stephen come on hi there thank you, ladies and gentlemen. Hello, chris. Nick and mark, every up there, down, there out there, around the world. Welcome to the late show. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. Ladies and gentlemen cheers and applause ladies and gentlemen, get out your sextants, your compass, your astrolabes because we are in uncharted waters. Because after two and a half years of the trump presidency, we finally spotted the great orange whale, and let me tell you, thar he blows. laughter , this morning this morning, the administration, for some reason, released the official notes of trumps phone call with ukrainian president volodymyr zele

Transcripts For KPIX The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20240714

Its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, dems debaits. Plus, stephen welcomes John Leguizamo comedian candice thompson. And a special appearance by ricky gervais. Featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause stephen hello beautiful. Lovely, beautiful. And the box. cheers and applause . Stephen this is awfully nice. Thank you very much. Audience Stephen Stephen Stephen Stephen stephen oh, thats nice. Thank you very much. Thank you, my friends. Happy friday. cheers and applause stephen thank you very much. Please, have a seat, everybody. Welcome, welcome, one and all to the late show. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. cheers and applause and it is friday. Happy friday, happy friday, everybody in here, out there, around the world. We are just days away from the second round of democratic president ial debates. Im going to tell you all about it. Were coming to you live both nights, ok

Transcripts For KPIX The 20240703

And ive done it all and i have passed all the bars im going to pass and if you think for one minute that you jury are going to walk around telling the world that don trump is done, youre out of your mind chaos in the court today when trumps new attorney hit the judge with a pile driver. Im holding you in contempt announcer its the late show with Stephen Colbert tonight. One fine day plus, stephen welcomes jeff daniels and Hannah Einbinder featuring louis cato and the late show band. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert [cheers and applause] stephen oh salt on french fries. [cheering] we got a good one, a long one. Welcome. Welcome one at all in here, out there, up there to the late show. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. Now for those of you, anyone at home keeping score, today was the start of week two of testimony in Donald Trumps hush money trial here in new york city. It is clearly taking a toll on the man. Here he is entering the co

Transcripts For KYW The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20171124

One brain leaves first question what is the name of the invisible force that holds us to the earth . President trump . Frankly, people still dont know all of the facts. No, we do know the facts. Weve known since the 1700s. Secretary tillerson, your answer . Im not going to deal with petty stuff like that. I wouldnt call it petty. Its the cornerstone of all physics. Back to you, president trump. When i make a statement, i like to be correct. I dont blame you, but you havent yet made one. Gentlemen, lets go over the rules. In order for us to assess your intelligence, you need to at least attempt to answer the question secretary tillerson, your answer . I have answered that question repeatedly. No, no, you havent. Please, take a guess. I do not, and i will not operate that way. Both are morons but more importantly, were all screwed both are morons were all screwed announcer its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, russias secret pokemon play. Plus, stephen welcomes conan obrien. A

Transcripts For KPIX The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20171124

One brain leaves first question what is the name of the invisible force that holds us to the earth . President trump . Frankly, people still dont know all of the facts. No, we do know the facts. Weve known since the 1700s. Secretary tillerson, your answer . Im not going to deal with petty stuff like that. I wouldnt call it petty. Its the cornerstone of all physics. Back to you, president trump. When i make a statement, i like to be correct. I dont blame you, but you havent yet made one. Gentlemen, lets go over the rules. In order for us to assess your intelligence, you need to at least attempt to answer the question secretary tillerson, your answer . I have answered that question repeatedly. No, no, you havent. Please, take a guess. I do not, and i will not operate that way. Both are morons but more importantly, were all screwed both are morons were all screwed announcer its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, russias secret pokemon play. Plus, stephen welcomes conan obrien. A

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