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But we dont do one thing to encourage them. You know, youre right blanche. Now take george. I doubt if hes had dinner by candlelight since electricity came in. Well, i for one am going to do something about it. Well, if you want to do it for one, do it. But im going to include george and do it for two. Its more fun that way. audience laughter now i am going. Gracie, is breakfast ready . Im starved. It certainly is, lover. audience laughter lover, at 8 00 in the morning . She must have said liver. Bacon is delicious for breakfast. Dear, sit here. Candlelight . Well, no dear, but candlelight is so much more romantic. In fact, it almost matches my fiery moods. Hows that . Well thats real nice, but i had my heart set on some fried liver. Oh, george, look at my gown. Doesnt it do something to you . Its beautiful. Oh, well, before i put on my apron, how do you like the back of it . Well, the back and the front would look better if i could see them over a piece of fried liver. Oh, dear. For a ....
And we will ride very fast. Wait a minute. What did you say . I said, you will sit next to me in the magic cart, and we will ride very no, no, no. I mean about the seawater. Oh, that. Greatgrandfather bilejik used to do it all the time. What magic makes your car move, master . Forget about the car. Are you you trying to tell me that your greatgrandfather could take salt out of seawater . Yes. At least he used to know how to do it 2000 years ago. His land was like a garden of eden, while that of his neighbors all around was like baked clay. Greatgrandfather would not tell them his secret. Jeannie. Mm . Jeannie, would he tell you his secret . I suppose so. Is there some demon inside your car that makes it move . Oh, forget about the car, really. I want you to do me a favor. I will do anything for you, master. Good. I want you to go back and talk to your greatgrandfather. Have a long talk with him. [laughs] except that. Why . Because i will not leave thee. Ah. But i will do the next best ....
And then he gave me a zero. laughter look honey, youre supposed to be oh honey, that tie stripes with a checkered jacket, really. You know, after were married, ill have to have better control of these things. What ill do is ill have full inspection every morning laughter before he leaves for the bank. Alright, george, you can put your eyes back in their sockets now. Look honey, youre supposed to meet professor hopkins oh my goodness, im supposed to meet professor hopkins before the Senior Council meeting. Why didnt you remind me . Watch my books for me, will you, sweetie . And you watch george for me, and dont let him look at any more blonds because ill be back. That dianes a kick. Yeah. Thats a nice outfit you got on. Oh, thank you. Believe it or not, i made it myself. Well, its a good color for ya. Oh, i think i like the thing you had on yesterday even better. Oh sure, i bet you dont even know what i wore. With the little, oh i ....
Disturbance, a heckle, or something goes wrong. The hammer throw. [ laughter ] 75 meters, huahuahua. [ laughter ] [ drum roll ] [ applause ] the swimmer at the olympics. The 50 meter dash. Hmmm. A little clair de lune on the piano. [ music ] [ laughter ] thirty meters. Twenty meters. Take the picture. What . [ applause ] the archer. The man with the bow and arrow. Hes got us all aquiver. Get it . Bow, arrow, quiver. [ laughter ] again, clair de lune, please. [ music ] [ laughter ] [ music ] [ music ] oh, jeez. [ applause ] last but not least, the pistol shot. Everybody knows this. [ laughter ] everybody, hum along with me. The pistol shot. I forgot it. [ laughter ] [ music ] [ applause ] you forgot the end of it. How does it go . Do it. You forgot the end of it. Yeah, go head. You forgot the cocks. Thats right, thats right. Thats right, there it is. Thats right. [ applause ] [ music ] [ applause ] i was waiting for the finish to go. I couldnt i f my mind went blank. Well, its what else ....
But if you have a dog, call them over, let them sit in front of the tv screen, because i think youre going to see him crack up for the first time. [ laughter ] no, im going to wait a few seconds for you to go get your dog and bring him back, because i dont think you should really crack up, so ill just wait a second. [ whistling ] [ laughter ] okay, got him there . Hi bushes, okay now fox, um, i invited down to the studios some dogs i can perform to sort of get the timing down, you know, and [ laughter ] and so i dont have to add any can bars later on, so its a Live Audience right here, here we go. My fabulous comedy act for dogs, here we go. Well good evening puddles and colleagues, you know bouser and fito was walking down the street one day and bouser spotted this big dish plate full of dog food. Well, he went over and took a fito and said, this stuff isnt fit for a human. [ laughter ] oh, i got a million of them. [ laughter ] oh ....