. let's get going. an tha come on. you can do bettet!r than that. oh, yeah. all right. okay. okay. you can stay happy tuesday, everyone. so democrat congressman jamaal bowman has had himself a weekont and it's only tuesday. >> on saturday, bowman pulleuedr a fire alarm at the capitol and claimed he didn't know what a fire alarm doee s. now, i'd be the last personaccu to accuse bowman of knowing thingsse, but the words fire an, alarm, they don't leave a lot of room confusion. >> he said he thought it opened the door. 't the ap don't fly with him. h hihe'll take the handle to the plane's emergency exit. flushes the toilet, thenad his office put out some suggested talking points ta jets, llow democrat they pu who are all happy to fall in line like outside hunter's hote l. >> this is what he wanted themwt to say to reporters. quoted hime, i believe congressn bowman, when he says this was an accident. republican wn s to instead focus their energy on the not see members their party beforee. anything else. end quote. we'll talk about raising the alarm in case of fire. scream, but excuse me,. >> that's kind of rich coming from a socialist democrat, seeing as stands for nationalist, socialist workers party. >> talk about the pot calling the kettle hitler. kettle >> but hey, what's goo hd forth the goose is good. the goose stepper. i thought that was clever. thank you, joe. >> but it's the same old story if you persuade everyone that your opposition is hitler, then that excuses you from your own bad, thatom. they did this with trump. i mean, you called him the second coming of adolf, so why wouldn't you rig an election. at not to do that would make you a sympathizer. but apparentlymake, bowman didnt actually know. jabar bowman said that, according to jamaal bowman. is there no limit to things thisaccord. man doesn't know?do' don't ask jamal. he doesn't knot don't asw. he just put out another statement on excuse. n ou i just became aware that in our messaging guidance there was inappropriatguidane use of the term without my consent. i condemn the use of the teri mo out of its precise definition. it is important to specify the term to referut m to membes of the party and neo-nazis. all right, so let's recap. jamaal bowman doesn't know what a fire alarm does. his stafarm doesf doesn't know a is, and none of them know the first rule of holes. stop digging. at this rate, this guy is going to wake up tomorrot thisuy wilw of course, though, the media bailed him out. by monda y, two of the big three network news programs had moved on from bowman's stuntveoc and didn't cover it. only cbs did. but even they framed as republican accusations and then repeated bowman's excuses. e are >> some republicans are also calling for the ouster and prosecutiooun of. a new york democrat jamaal bowman, a former middle school horm of pullinghey a house office building fire alarmrm to delay the 10th proceeding saturday. bowman apologized and saidroceen he thought the alarm would open a locked doorway as he rushed thoud open and after discussing it, defending bowmaner defen, tw quickly moved on. and believe me, moving quickly, it's not easy for them. to greas they have to stop every six or eight feet to grease the walls . >> now, even though the media's already moved on, surely anis absurd event like this is ripe for the picking from comedy show s, right? you think the network late night talk shows that returned last night tha have something to say about a democratic congressman committing a federal crimeno on camera in the capitol? nope. it was mostly trump jokes. and of course, with a few lauren boebert jokes throughout thrown in. es it was material ripped fromen the headlines. if the headlines were fromes weeks ago, jimmy fallon avoided political humor altogether. his credit. seth meyers did. variations of trum seth medid p that's no surprise if liberal compliance was our currency. compliseth meyers would be jeff bezos. >> for colbert, it's mostly trump jokes boebert couple of bob menendez and taylor swift jokes thrown in. kimmel mostly trump jokes. john kennedy jokes. >> but you get it. the writers are back, and so are their restrictions. joke about this. don't jokeut about that and geta nostalgic for the days when the hosts haen thed. . but this isn't just about bowman. he's a product of his environment. this't just abthe media environe is illiberal and liberals in power. no, the mainstream medianstrea will them more cover than one of whoopi's memos. a that's why bowman can pull the fire alarm in front of a surveillance camera lisurvie abt and then lie about what he lied about. that's why joe biden can claim he's never done an illegal, immoral or unethical thing immoe. lif sorry, the guy's as crooked that painting hung by stevie. >> that's why his son could canb bring cocaine. the white house. that's why the clintons can treat ukraine likeeat a 20 something intern. that's why bob menendez can swim around in a big pile of gold like scrooge mcduck. they're all openly corrupt because they know they can k get away with it. and that's because their comrades in the media care about nothing but power. that's not to say republicans aren't fair gamerepu. trump is fair game. we should all mock and criticize people in power. should andyou're mocking and n me. i'm off limits. d lecturing ani'll pick a team y lawyers on you faster than you could say. jacoby and myers. side o >> but when you only go after one side of the aisle, you give the game awa givy. even you're not speaking truth to power. you're not even doing comedy. you're a colbert or kimmel. just another political activist with a house banother pod. that's why i don't care when lib say i'm one sided. sorry, thii'm one-s one show aga every other late show, late night show iother n america. >> they're all doing trump jokes, so why should i? it's like william f buckley once said. liberals want to hear other views until they discover otherr their are other views. it'sid i say that? maybe i said that.ar it's hard to remember since i started putting nyquil in myd protein shakes. >> but i'll make a deal with those otherall make night,. i'll start slamming republicans. when they start slamming republicans s. now, the minute they do that, someone's going to pull the fire alarmal. >> well, very tense. gueslet's s when one of his aude members first got, it's usually from appendicitis. comedian joe mackey packs heatai while dispensing red meat townhall.com editor and fox news contributor katie babb. he looks and sounds a gram of weed. comedian and founder of western razor, david angelo and like a proctologist office oldwait men also wait hours to see her new york times best selling author and fox news contributor got tim joe.one of >> have people ever tried to pull a fire alarm during? one of your shows? not my stand ugep shows when i'm stripping, yes. because things get pretty hot.ll >> i'll tell you. i'll tell you what, though, greg. i think jamaal bowman can pullrm the fire alarm again and wouldna defend him again. that is just the sweet, liberal, liberal privilege. sho that i wish we talk show host writers all had on the conservative side because these talk shows, they aren't funnthesowy, they gw ratings, but they get paid millions of dollars. and on the fli dolla p side of that, my id card doesn't even work in this studio, i have to letsto iscurity.. and every day i'm like, is this it? is this a day where, whenn' threatened to kill me if w the jokes don't go on fridayel that someone'sda to pounce? >> well, i mean, joe, i mean, let's be frank. >> we eliminated your position two years ago. r none of us really wantedyour to hurt your feelings. and you. but you're a crowd favorite, so we let you come in. wow. yeah. well in., kevin gets fired quicr than i do. >> yead quickeh, well, what an excellent segway to, katie.vin >> who would have thought that kevin mccarthy would get canned before bowmane ? >> i mean, it's not like mccarthy pulled the fire alarm. i mean, he shut up today . he got us off the pope. definitely don't have the voteds . >> stay here. and now i'm leaving. you know, i think this says a lot about educatioi n, americ, that this guy was a school principal and yet claims was princt know how to read a fire alarm, that he was confused. >> i mean, i think that says a lot about the state of education in america and the kids that can'e t all over all e the country. >> that is frightening. also, he you know, nobody'sw pointing out that he did throw his staff under the bus or did. yes. you knowaff uns be, because he o i think he compared people to before and now suddenly he's changed his is to compare to a lot of conservatives to . and now he wants to make sure that we respect the termaz and only apply it. and it's very precise fashion, which apparently also doesn't knowprecise . of a kit again, state of education in america very clear that when people like this case ica peop t the show, kids are not doing well. >> yeah, you knooing w david, used to write jokes. >> now you're sittin g on smallom fortune from your western razore company. you look very comfortable. thank you. yes. what is your what's your feeling? why is it i mean, you you wrote you wrote for these shows. why? why won't they? it seems why like this fire alam joke is perfect fodder. this fire. well, you know, i don't know why. why does anyone do anything, greg? >> you know, that's a great question. no. all right. judd hirsch, is that it was. >> no, it was donaldit was sutherland. right. well donald , right?, anybody we those sweaters thinks there are. , i bought this oe sweaters br. at nordstrom's. i mean, it's actually cheaper to spend the winte r. >> barbados. i mean, the prices . but, you know, they pose the fire alarm. and, you know, on congress, you pull the fire alarm, it's actually just bernie alar actua, goinground fire. fire. t's a fire that's how they you know, that's how it's wire's jusd tha, that's why that's why we don't do them. >> yeah, i don't know.>> i t >> is it a funny joke?ho because it was cute right now? >> a little bit, bernie. i always go to bernie sanders. you you can't fail when you do a very well. >> you know what's interesting? inte is bernie and y and you made a fire alarm joke. welle., but it's an old questio that bears repeating. >> if you were a republican, repus. uld be front page new oh, yeah. he were probably going to be in jail. i mean, that's we understand that. we understand. i don't know what happened. he's you can't say anymori done the democrat. that's news. that's the real story. yeah. you know, i didn'tthat's al new were paying hunter biden. >> do you know what happened? well, they were saluted in theut >>nadian parliamened in t. so there's just some 96 year old in argentina, like, you know, a hunter. >> i bought one of your watercolors. is that a german accent?a no, it wasn'get. >> all right. i apologize to the people of germany. are a well, you're a apologist. way to go. all righ nt, dad, finish this u. >> why can't the media, like, do that? just, like, pretend to be fair? like, you know, like, imagine t this happened to a republican and then that way with a democrat? >> i ask. i thought the part of the pressa release was when he said accidental when he fire alarm. >> yes. i don't like that. you knowlike tha, i like he's tu his buddies like, i'm your friend. be loyal to me. pafriend, beright and i and i dt get partisan loyalty, but i am a very loyal frienrtbut d as, you know? >> yes, yes. but if you mess up, got to at least admit it to your friend first. like i messed up. still a place to have my bact.k still instead of doing what he's doing here, which is like, oh, yeah, accidental fire alarm accide. wrong so case like, dude, it can be hard to admit you were wrong sometimes, but really not in this casel yo. >> all you need to admit is i know what a fire alarm is. doeses. >> like it's a nobodyha actually thinks he doesn't know what a fire alarm is. yeaha and if they do, then that is even meaner. >> yeah. it's almost as thoug h he wants people to believe he's stupid. >> rather just like a liar.than >> j i mean,us you probably't ko convince the media that he doesn't know what a fire alarm is. not probably believe hi a fire >> they wouldn't believe republican. they believe him. they believe that he ignored the huge, but at the door.on te >> say i say i dt all the time. i am sorry. >> i made an impulsive decision . you know what? if the media believes that he i didn't know what a fire alarm is, isn't that a little bit racista ? it's a little bit racist. talk about low expectations right now going here that i'm not going near that one. just smile. somalia is beast. why he's not on the bachelor. i'll never know. >> all right. up next, criminals prevail as nixes cash bail. >> yeaxeh. if you'll be in the new york i area and like tickets to see gutfeld go to foxnews.co m slash gutfeld and click on the link to join our studio audience. >> i thought you said this was going to be hard. you're actually enjoying this on air. i thought there weren't any secrets between us, but i lovefe you. it was the worst headache of mne pain you would not believe. like something exploded in my head. 15 million people have an undiagnosed brain aneurysm. if have the worst headache of your life, get help immediately. visit lisa foundation board to learn more. >> hello, i'm former arkansas governor mike. what a times you can't control the amount of sleep that you're getting. you can't fall asleep or you're tossing and turning all night. you can't get the sleep you need to stay healthy. i know it's scary unless you use relaxium sleep relaxium is a product that's made from natural ingredients and it usually from the very first night you try it, it helps you fall asleep, stay asleep and wake up refreshed earning your body those quality hours of sleep that it desperately needs. >> join the hundreds of thousands of people who have experienced the relief and health benefits from getting a great night's sleep and get relaxium sleep relaxium sleep helps you fall asleep faster, stay asleep longer and wake up feeling refreshed. yeah, relaxium has been a miracle for us since. i mean in the wrist is improved marriage. >> i don't even know how we lived for 30 years without it. because now i know this man differently than i knew him before. >> relaxium sleep is tested and designed by a neurologist to help you fall asleep faster ,stay asleep longer and wake up refreshed. relaxium is drug free and not addictive, so you can take relaxium every night and. never worry about side effects. and the best part is it can start working. >> from the very first night when i found out relaxium my life changed, it really did stop afraid and start sleeping your fears away with relaxium sleep. your body and your mind will thank you. i'm telling you, relaxium is the real deal. >> mike huckabee is so confident that relaxium will work for you. he's asked us to give away 1000 bottles calling. get your risk free bottle of relaxium sleep now it's guaranteed to work or your money back. call 800 9196467 or visit. try relaxing them. com that's 800 9196467 or visit try relaxium dot com tara reid on jesse watters prime time the american is it possible my network could take my business to the next level? it is with comcast business. powering all your devices with gig-speed wifi. and you get fast downloads and uploads. pick it up! pick it up! oh we got this! because it's powered by the next generation 10g network. more speed for your business? it's not just possible. it's happening. get started for $59.99 a month for 12 months. plus, ask how to get an $800 prepaid card with a qualifying internet bundle. comcast business, powering possibilities. here's why you should switch from chrome to duckduckgo. duckduckgo is a browser you download to your mobile and desktop devices. unlike chrome, the duckduckgo browser has privacy built-in. it comes with a private alternative to google search, which doesn■t spy on your searches, and it blocks cookies and creepy ads. and there's no catch. it's free. we make money from ads, but they don't follow you around. for a year and you really age join the millions of people taking back their privacy by downloading duckduckgo on mobile and desktop today. when you want to keep crime won't but it just go away. be must be time for we can't beat them. >> joioin themn them. >> yeah. yeah. as thugs beat our let's put on rose colored glasses. after all, no matter much, wechw complain about crime. our liberal leaders just side with the. first up, democratic congressman henry cuella logiciar was carjacked at gunpoint while parking in washington, d.c. night. >> yeah, he found parking. he got his car back a few hours later, but thieves had stolen his sushi out of it, which is, you know, another crimego that will go on unchallenged. at last check. cops are still lookingallenged r the perps. that should be easy. my bet. it's the guys they didn't arrest d be eas before. it but should they be charged? carjackings have increasedthe more than 100% since 2022, which means feweercent sr peoplt be driving with fewer cars on the road. that means a reduced reliance, fossil fuels. so in a sense, carjackers are climate change heroes. every person they kill is one less carbon footprint. greta thunberg should throwarbo them a kegger. >> meanwhile, l.a., a new zero bail policy for nonviolent offenders is i for n. e of course, this will only incentivize more theft like the smashingincentiv attacks yoe every day. but why shouldn't more cities adopt cashless bail? think of the advantages of having criminaladvantag s us aso pris opposed to prisons, for one. consider the calories you burn running from them. you in some great cardio and fa get home faster from work. and the constant fear increasess your heart rate. so you get an aerobics workoutob riding the train. and then in portland, the public safety commissionerly told people to only call 911 inl a life and death emergency or a crime in progress. so no more casual calls to 911 to report mere mailings. ve but i have to agree with him. feweagr one one calls means more time for dispatchers and first responders to undergo diversity and equity training. firso undergthat way, they can i your pronouns instead of your address. se tha and really, there's nothing worse than finding yourself misgendereind on a wanted poster . finally, that new yorklly th professoatr who a reporter witha machete, has avoided jail time . charlene rodriguez will instead have to undergo between six and 12 months of behavioral modification counselinsig, which is great news because it'll really help her at her new job at benihanr a. katy so i decided if you can't beat them, join him because, you know, we sit here at fox, n we talk about crime all the time and it's like the other side o, the coin. >> the democrats choose to defend criminals because agre they be seen to agree w with that. >> so what have we what have we decided to b, t e pro crime? e >> it's like i think we should we should start committing crimes, too. you could have had, sweater for free not to worry about it. you just walk into nordstrom, take home? >> nope, no problem. yeah, you're a sucker. yeah. we should all do the thing we shoutogeth together, you know, go in and just steal a bunch of stuffn and leavd stea e. but what grinds my years about the d.c. thing, especially that washington, d.c. is the nation's capital. if you want to live, in california, in l.a. or in new york or whatever, fine. or neerbut is a place that bels to all americans, which is why great in 2020 whenit was president trump brought the national guard in to stop the and burning of the city, because people should be able to do, but they continuetinu to defend criminals. it's like they have venn diagram, like, you know, the vice president andm. wha they look at what is you know what oppose. so like can't agree with trumppc or republicans violent crime those thingsan can't mix so therefore it just stays the same. and to them it's worse to identifo it'sy on behalf of w and order than it would be to to just lock up these guysck who ar up the now carjacking democrats in washington, d.c. so they make this weird choice. >> yeah, even when the comen s hoic to theire fo house, they're lik, oh, really defiant about it t because there's too much of asuk sunk cost in hating republicans and truming p let me guess, dave you're not that bothered by this issue. >> it's just crime nt bother. >> you know, i haven't been paying attention the whole year. >> right. you know, the crime thing? yep. why is it criminals are like such a powerful voting bloc now, right? you know what i mean? like every people are bendingg r over backwards to help criminals. yeah backwa i can't get anything.i've you know, i've never asked for anything from the government fo and then, you know, the government people are sitting around, hey, we got to do somethine gog let's makemm murder a misdemeanor. >> who was asking fo r that? >> yeah, i don't know. i just i think what we gotthinkh to do is to try to at least try teach these people in the streets, whoever the criminals, give them marksmanship classess,. >> cause you hear too much about the bystander, the innocent bystander. oh interesting point.ng poi >> you know, teach himnt how tot heshoot, and then just at least they'll hit the person they're trying to kill. you are a man of solutions. that is the worst idea i've ever heard.thank somehow. i think you just came up tith that on the spot, didn'u jc you? >> yeah. you'd be surprised at how little prep went int would bo t. not at all.i'm >>here i'm here with stacks of paper. and he works in in a card again. and he's half asleep. >> cat, what do you what of all of these things that we mentioned which one strikes your fancy or outrage. >> well,cy or ou i'm just okay,o what is behavioral modification counseling? >> hmm? isn't that just therapy? yes. that's why. i go, yeah. >> i'm like, you know what? we could do better. yeah. i mean, what would it be? it's likhat woule, don't wave a machete. >> well, that's literally what therapy is. it's how to modify your behavior. and. okay, going back to your brilliant poiny yourehavior.t d, actually, people were asking for criminal justice reform. i was one of those people. there were certain concerns like nonviolent drug crime onet people going to jail for that. there was people who are expressing that. and so de were peoc is like, okay, so what you're saying is the jury's still out on the carjackins th ig debate? yeah, yeah. no, nobody was saying that . and they're the whole thing for everybody because i really think that we can all agreevitee that carjacking not good. no it's -- it's weird how its n was predicted that that kind of riff reformation or whatever would bleedn orver otr areas they said no, no, no, no, no. it's just nonviolent drug offenders. t nonvio drupeople who smokes a. should. >> yeah, but it's not. no ippery sw what a slippery. oh, i want up. you got a join.t life in prison? >> yeah, well, you would think again. not thinking before he speaking. david angelot thinking b. wh joe, have you ever pulled a call? en911 when you're dying on stag? >> no, greg, there's no up there. it's a broad support. >> you move me, man. yeah, move me. it's not the crime. everyone. our o it's our outlook on the crime. like, for instance, all thesel s murders make me appreciate all the time spend with my loved ones, because you never know when they're going to get shot in the headthey'r. >> yeah, i actually deal withth it. i actually think about that. i actually do thinat k about that. >> i don't. i think about when i like somebody i love is out.e th i hope they get home safeley gy because i never think of, i you know. >> yes, i do. you do not think do. anybody. i think thinking about my dog right now. there you go thinking abou. i believe that. well, your dog is a high target. no. r >> is that frenchie for that? see, people stare at him, looking him up and down. you got to get him like a piece of meat. yeah no, you. you were kidding. but i. i agree. no, i do thinkng, bui that in i love the the portland 911 aspect because i becauset sa crime in progress or deatha is imminent. so if i call them up and i'm like i got stabbed in armthey'r and they're like stabbed in the arm past tensee and they're like, we're going to send police over to arrest for calling 911. >> yeah. incredible. so how is it so expensive in these cities? so hownsiv this crime, portlandp they don't have police. everyone's running wild. thtl'tone bedrooms, $800,000. >> how much are these criminals make, for god's sake? it's a great point. again, from david angelo. you know you are going to get your own show on fox. >> i just feel it. thank you. i appreciatefeelt. you guys. >> your letter campaign has worked. all right. up up next, she demands hotels remodel so the plus sized can water if your roof showing danger signs like streaks or raise shingles. it be trouble. and a new roof could cost ten, 15 or $20,000. >> introducing roof backs the first professional and affordable roofing treatment that is scientifically proven to strengthen and extend the life of your roof with roof, max, you will have the protection of a brand new roof and safe roof. max is skilled. technicians apply safe, effective and affordable natural treatment. within hours, you a roof that performs like a new roof roof. max is exclusive treatment re saturates old dried shingles with a natural bio friendly formula that quickly restores flexibility and water repelling protection guarantee. look, this is a 17-year-old asphalt shingle. it literally disintegrates. but here's an identical shingle that we treated with max's proven formula. it passed rigorous flexibility testing from ohio state university as a new shingles saw roof. max roof can also pass a home inspection if you're getting ready to sell or for insurance saving you money. roof max has treated over 15 million square feet of roofs all across america. and just check out our website for the thousands of five star reviews. you know, i was skeptical at first with the existing condition of the roofs. we were having high and shingles were blowing off the roofs continually. but, you know, five years later, after the application and the roofs looked great and we have no issues with any shingles blowing off the roof. keep your family safe and happy with roof max. caller go online now for a comprehensive link. brit and roof maintenance tuneup a $539 value free roof max more less money guaranteed. >> call 1-800- 914 1370. that's 1-800- 914 1370. or log on roof max .com call 1-800- 914 1317. >> now do you have too much body fat. it tends to accumulate on your stomach, hips and thighs. are you struggling to lose weight? does it seem no matter what you do, you just can't get rid of body fat? body fat builds over our midsection. body fat increases for lack of exercise and poor diet. the obesity research institute has found the solution, it's called limousine. limousine is clinically proven . help reduce your body fat and weight and to raise awareness about this weight loss breakthrough, the company is letting people try lean risk free for 30 days. >> now you can lose times more weight. just add light position for only 2995. call right now and we'll double your order for free and ship it free too. and for a limited time will double the size of each bottle for free. so now you have four times the light bar scene for just 2995 plus you'll get metabolite plus to help boost your energy and metabolize them. but you must call lipa. zayn is clinically proven to help you lose body fat. in fact, a double blind showed that not only did participants lose weight, but 17% of each pound that was lost was pure body fat. what's even more amazing is that people were not to change their daily lives. it's so easy. just take lipo. zane that's it. if you're ready, then call the number on your screen. right now my position is the price because light buzzing is clinically proven to work. now you can lose four times more weight. just add light position for only 2995 call right now and we'll double order for free and ship it free to and for a limited we'll double the size of each bottle for free. so now you have four times the light position for just 2995 plus you'll get a table one plus two help boost your energy and metabolism. but you must call cole 800 9290319 three. is this even real sponsored my metrical meal replacement shakes a fat activist's latest . america's hallways are too tight. >> yeah, a plus size influencer named jaylene chaney says netels need make their hallways bigger to accommodate obesedeomd people. it's one of many recommendations she posted to a bill to improvat e accessibility.ssib >> watch.il i amit on a mission. el revolutionize the travel industry and make it a more accessible, accepting, accommodatinstry and makg for a. provide sturdy wire chairs without armrests, ensure bags were strong support in a higher in weight capacity, make elevators and hallways spaciouiouss to alw for easy movement of larger individuals and those utilizing mobility devices, adjustable handle showerheads and raised toilet seats for addedd offer larger beach and pool seating provide size inclusive display clear and accurate information on these amenities on hotel. t >> hmm. i like all of that. and i'm nofat fat.t, but it apps that while it's offensive im expect her toiv her lifestyl, it's imperative that all of us soange will. has it worked so far? the only venue willing to accommodate her is sea world. >> so cat., you cat, you have a weight problem? we've been talking about it. >> i knew we were going to go to you first. i'm definitely the person the overweight community wants to hear from the most. the pe oveyou know, i think the overweight community would be disgusted by this. commi think and i think i speakr them a few times a year. i'm overweightimes a. >> she finds it. she would find it offensive ifhe people told her to lose, s pe but she's perfectly fine to have an entire society changed for her. >> well, she's like, we matter just as everybody else. it's like, okay, but you seem to not understand that you seem to think you're the most important. because the way she my favorite right, was when she said, just widevorite, ysn hallways. >> yeah, that's impossible. well, no, because here's the thing. hallwayshing, ha are attached to ceilings and floors, right? you can't widen them, at leasttn without causing a mass casualty event. >> yeah, true.e. >> it's true. you have to act. you have to widen the buildings . i'm asking you to make some simple accommodations, like please demolishtoo ma the building and rebuild it >>e do it. anks sh to enlarge a building is as easy as, like, just eating and eating and enlarging yourself. >> there's plenty of things i would likekey there's plenof e all clothing to have sleeves because. my arms are very like, is she okay looking and sometimes, sometimes i still like the outfit and i jusill liket gr it. and then the arms are out there i like and demand all clothes has sleeves just because my arms are disgusting. >> this is a great point. , what's your name again? joe. joe. so i'm a i'm basically agoraphobic. >> i have a fear of open spacehs and i'm a person of small stature. >> shouldn't i demand smallestar rooms and narrower hallways to make me better? >> joe no. great. thcause that would be entitled>n . and it made me think that maybe at one point in the past she was thin and beautifulit one p haoo, or developed such an entitled personality like that. one but i also wrote some other one liners, which i think you'll enjoyu will e. >> so gather round. greg. i'm guessing comfort suitess isn't just your favorite hotel . >> surprisingly surprisingly, she didn't mention fihe size of the fitness center. let's stop there. you know, sometimes it's just a relief to have a comedian preparf e. >> tha >> yeah, that's unfair, he wrote in advance. david, where do you stand on? i mean, this is not about obese people. this is aboupeoplet somebody who who feels entitled that society should change for her.bout hot >> look, when i talk about hotels. mm-hmm. item number one. yeah. breakfast. >> can we get it past 730 in the morning? you know, she didn't even mention that. yeah, yeah, yeah. it's like on vacation.you' >>re you're having the time of your life, and it's like, oh, you got to get u p. wn her >> you got to be down heretwee between five and seven. yeahve . >> if you want a box of frostedn flakes. yeah. i mean, what about my rights? i sleep, what abou i am out allt mm. o i need to wake up at the crackfn of. >> mm. and go get a continental. yeah. do you knoet a conal.w what elsn me? you know, check in 1:00, but checcome ak out at 11, likee lose 2 hours on that on that tradone off. u don' >> exactly. you don't even get 24 hours out of your hotel. stay. not gethour your hot wrong. i should get a refund. yeah, he said you have to callev for a latee to c and then they t like they're doing you a favor. >> we got it. d these got to do is fin criminals and figure have them figure out how wale can steal hotel rooms. >> mm-hmm. i know how to do that. you just crossed>> i k border. cross yeah. yeah, just cross the border. yeah. there you go. 's your s your answer. >> yeah. wow. they had. everything's all worked out. well, she. s she's criticizing all these industries. what do you thinll these k is next on our list? >> i mean, this could apply to every building on earth. well, this chick better never go to europe because they don't even give skinnye they people al shower door there. yeah, or two towels or airho conditioningwer dor condit or wt don't go there. but honestly, half the country is over, overweight or obese. so maybe it's a good business model. m >> start building these spaces. i don't know. i don't know tstart . there's a market for it. i did. the obesity numbers are very>> l because sometimes they're very large. >> yeah, but no, but they're also this they're deceptive. >> like when you look at bmi, it's like everybody't s obese compared to the bmi, what's it called? body mass index. that, so look at that. just go to the county fair. yeah jus, i cannot i as obesey y because of how heavy my muscles are. n wei but can we make one more point about the continental breakfast what we're about that usually they only have a three hour range which makes hard to go twice. >> yeah. enta >> and what is so continental about it? what's up with tha?t? >> what's wrong with the continental? i don't get it. oh, it's so silent. i don't know. i mean, you're right. what is a continent. yeah, you know, you go there, there's no continental. no, there's none. there's no reference to plate tectonics anywhere. >> oh, one. >> what's the difference between a continental and an >> ween ? ast you well, american breakfast, you'll have eggs. continental. you might not have coenta eggs. now we >> it's just your bagel with fox nation special on continental s breakfast, hosted by kat timpf. >> i wouldn't say no.mp all right. >> we got to move on. coming up in local news, kittens driver and emus, it was the crime that rocked the nation. dna was found at the crime scene. genetic genealogy is one of the most objective investigative techniques out there. you could generate a dna profile from as little as five things. it's going to change everything. we believe it is. bloodline dna detectives in the moscow murder streaming now on fox nation. sign up today for your last chance to geou're agt your first three months for 199. >> i'm jonathan lawson here to tellooking l you about life insurance through the colonial pen program. he three ps. you're 50 to 8g to buy life insurance on a fixed budget remember the three piece what are the three p's the three ps of life insurance on a fixed budget are price, price and price. get co a price you can afford, a price that can't increasvee and a prie that fits your budget. that fits your budget. >> i'm 50 four. >> what's my price? >> what's my price? you can get coverage $9.95 a month. >> i ju i'm 65. and take medications. what's my price? also 995 a month. >> i just turned 80.t popula >> what's my price? >> if you're 50 to 85, call w about the number one mosttions. popular whole life insurance plan available through plan available through the colonial pen program. it has a starting at $9.95 a month. starting at $9.95 a month. no medical exam, no health your acceptance is guaranteed. and this plan has a guaranteed lifetime rate luck. lifetime rate luck. so you can never go up reason. so call now for free information and. you'll also get this free beneficiary planner. and is yours free just for calling? so call now for free information. call one 842 1800 for your free information and free gift. that's one 842 801 842 1800 call now. >> start saturday from with america's number one game this saturday on fox. clutch quarterback kyle mccord and marvin harrison to lead the undefeated buckeyes against toyota by lower and the terrapins. it all starts with big noon kick off live from columbus. dennis the terrapins and buckeyes in the big ten battle the best pre game the best announcers the biggest game. maryland, ohio state. it's big news saturday on fox. >> you said this was going to be hard. you're actually enjoying this on air. i thought there weren't any secrets between us. i love you. >> snickering is a scam hit. can you spot a real product from a fake picasso? what? i think it's snake boy. is real or snake oil? all new wednesday after the masked singer on fox. >> are you over 50? would you like to get up to 33% more income in retirement? then call now and get this free book. annuity do's and don'ts for baby boomers from a financial firm on maximizing your income in retirement. this book reveals little known secrets about annuities, strategies and simple to understand terms that can help you make the right choices before buying an annuity. and if you call right now, as a bonus, will throw in a free annuity rate report. we've researched over 1200 annuities summarizing the rates and benefits for you. so miss out on this opportunity because supplies are limited. call now and find out how you can get up to 33% more income in your retirement and you'll receive annuity do's and don'ts for baby boomers and the annuity rate report as an added bonus. both books are yours free. just for calling annuity general today call 873 9800. that's 873 9800. again 800 2783 9800. >> coast to coast with stories that matter most. you're watching local with winner of the first nobelti prize for cheeks chet van jansen. >> and now here's chet. >> yes. yeah. thank you. thank you. than youk you. were >> it's local news where each guest has to share a storyuest m wherever they're from. and then i vote on a winner, and then that person getvote owo that. >> we interrupt gutfeld for this breaking news. chet van jansen has been stripped of his nobel prize for best cheeks after video hasen resurfaced of the disgraced newsmas nobel n, completely embarrassing himself at a spring break event years ago. ' disgusted onlookers were apparently so unimpressed. appaessethey to catch him when e into the crowd. he survived.d, but doctors say he will never be able to have children. we'll keep you updated on this story as we learn more. now back to gutfellearn d nomowr another tough for chick. anyway, i'm going to go to youvr first, david, for local news. >> i hope you have something interestinhope havg and preparer it. oh, i prepared grade for this, greg. thisthis. is story out of my hometown. >> roll the tapehometown. >> you guys don't have the tape . i spent all day. i had to say how you and i get down. duncan, i didn't even know this story. doordash wedding. a driver for doordash got stuck in a swamp delivering duncan. can you believe the headline from this great. >> can you believe it? i mean, now, to be fair, this is in massachusetts, sodriver i didn't know the driver probably was drunk. was druwhat?t >> you can't say that he mighte sue you? i said probablyoy. >> was allegedly, he was a lightweight. was it ted kennedy? ted kennedy? no, i should have gotten that route. look, this crowd upset. what? why did he do this? was it because he was following an app wa. could that have been that he was following a gps? yes. it helps to knows followa gp ths all in my tape. he was following gps and it led him into a swamp. yeah. you know, and then the dunkin donuts was not delivered, and that'sunkin' d how they foud because the customer he report,1 he called 911 because in massachusetts if your dunkin is lat e, you know he's like officer i i mess in a corolla, i need a cook. my cruller. >> guys, can you give me a little bit? you do >> you don't have to do that. all right, katie. all right. a woman in mesa, arizona. i'm not from mace, but i am from arizona, is distraught after her pet emu escaped,escape which shouldn't escape because they're not nice to people who aren't their owners. not that.give herre and because arizona, the maricopa county sheriff's department , to wrangle it with a lasso and it ended up dying. wow. so we maybe should defund the the police after they murdered this beautiful animay murderl ws she's going to miss snuggling. and she says that they don't know anything about how to wrangle an emu. and you can't just put a rope around its neck and expectedrou survive. it >> so it collapsed and nows it's dead. wonet w talk about a downer. yeah. that would never make one more thing on the five. probably not. but he had good hair as.ddle in >> and his emu photo. yeah. you know what they say. he said cuddle an. >> that sounds well. emu without me and you. save all one didn't you. you all got a chuckle out of that one. a tragic chuckle. he didn't find that funny. i thought it was pretty good. i lookedi thou at the word. i go, hey, there's me and you in it. and then there's. >> joe. your joe, what do you got, greg? finally, some good news after that deadl? y story in derry township, pennsylvania. omeowner >> man trespass into a home, encountered the homeowner and left the homeowner and then submitted this sketch to the immece, and the police immediately issued a warrant after recognizing as the lead at singer of aha, after seeing hima decades earlier. in the take on the video,de authorities warn he's known to go to diners to pick up human women and then he can travel through walls to go back and forth between his one dimensional world. you know that that's a great well, go that back to the original one. that's a pretty good drawing fo r for a description. you know, he looks like everybody i've walked i've met at a used record store. >> he.know, yeah. you know that grand funk railroad is an underrateund record. that's what he would say. wow, these guys don't careuy. >> now, david, maybe you're right. truly, yes all right, all right, cat, close it out. detroit. detroit. a cat in detroit was pregnant,g. and now she's not because she gave birth. h. and so what happened is she has these kittens that are now at a used bookstore in detroit for f reason. it's called detroit special res. ookor s and you can go play with the the kittens and adopt them. and kdopti cannot recommend the of a feral cat more. i'm sure a part of tha ocat mort is because i'm 34 years old and childless, so my maternal instinct has been misplaced. be but i'm sure it's only part of it because feral and they're lonely. and at first because i'm doing my my live shows in detroif cout this week, and at first i was like, is this feral cat throwing a competing book even etint? but it'll be over by my show in october. so are there still available? >> there are the real kat timpfa .comre though, now, so it's goig to be so much fun. sh what are the what are the dates for that show? >> october seventh and eighth. so? first you go to this books bookstore, get a cat. >> yesto. >> and then you come see this cat who is not pregnant yet. >> yet anyway. yeah. yeah.. >> that's an ad on. >> just kidding. please don't get me pregnant tomorrow. all right, let's. >> up next, a woman files suit over a wedgie dispute dispute. magnum. magnum, who are you? austin. austin powers doing what i do for a living. there's always surprises, but the one all new magnum p.i.. check your local listings. >> are you tired of that old worn out bath or shower? now you can have a new one installed in just one day with a new limited time from jacuzzi bath remodel. we're waiving all installation costs with no interest and no payments for one year. jacuzzi has been making feel great for over 65 years. and now you can get a gorgeous custom bath remodel at a price you can afford with no stress and no mess. >> i've been trying to get him to remodel that bath for years. >> i called and they didn't. just one day and at a price we could afford. >> every time i stepped over my own tab, i worried i fall. i don't have those years anymore. with jacuzzi, you can get safer, easy entry, shower to keep you feeling comfortable and independent at home. your new jacuzzi bath or shower is now is the best time to call. we're waiving all installation costs with no interest and no payments for one year. go to jacuzzi, bath remodel .com or call 800 3482867 call now fox nation brings you closer to the truth with fox justice and now is your last chance to get your first three months for 199. if it wasn't you who did it, exclusive crimes stories you can't see anywhere else. this is jeffrey dahmer as he it's and terrifying true cases that have captivated the nation . it was the largest ring in the history of america at that time . a heck of a lot. it still needs to be answered. all part of fox justice on fox nation. sign up today for your last chance to get your first three months for 199. >> show her you remember the jewelry exchange has bands 189 half carat anniversary bands 399 one carat, 699 two carat, three stone rings, 1490 thousands of gifts guaranteed to appraise for double the jewelry exchange. >> direct the headlines the events the story. >> martha maccallum breaks down every angle. from chrome to duckduckgo. duckduckgo is a browser you download to your mobile and desktop devices. unlike chrome, the duckduckgo browser has privacy built-in. it comes with a private alternative to google search, which doesn■t spy on your searches, and it blocks cookies and creepy ads. and there's no catch. it's free. we make money from ads, but they don't follow you around. join the millions of people taking back their privacy by downloading duckduckgo on mobile and desktop today. for you by visiting vega of forward slash vr ea today. >> a story in five words. yeah a story in five words. disney water slide wedgiee we lawsuit does not sound great. ys cat, i'm going to go to you first. and as a woman , a femaleg disny that is doing disney for more than 50 grand, alleging a severe wedgie injury aftern th going down the humungous hua waterslide back in october 2019. the suit says the park should have known of the risk, especially for womenthe risk. i didn't know that there was like a separate risk factor fowr men and women when it comes to water slides and wedgies. >> were you awarater ides ande ? >> it's pretty obvious. it's pretty hot. ye>> it's s. ah. oh, look, i want to just take the whole injury part out of the story. >> yeah,y and just sayothere that blinded it. that bothered me the most mewa there to celebrate anr 30th birthday at disney. >> and i say this as someone who literally threw her own for her 30th birthday. >> going to disney world. yeahth b yeah. for your 30th birthday? yeah, i.i made >> i made my father give me a eulogy and i think this is strange. >> just can't catch a break masn . >> they're getting you know david, what's up with disney? i mean,, walk. ey i >> walt disney is spinning in his freezer because at at the stories coming out of this network. yeah, it's true. >> it's true. i mean, they got this, you know ,you can wedgies on the rides. that's why mickey's voice is soc high. ke >> you know, it it's true,ca though. disney's got catching a break. they're like, you know, getting in trouble over bambtching ay'r do you hear that? t that they're like, they might edit the ending of bambi because ithe endin bam too much. >> oh, the dad. >> imom will comh, thee back. don't know. i just figured you might know something, but apparentl fa again, i failed. yeah. yeah. i didn't have a good >> i did prepared. >>n' i off the cuff on the bambi ending. >> katie, we we actually get this. our show, ge. we actually reached out to disney. we never reached out to anybod y because we're lazy. they respond. no, no response yet. did the e side are you on? 50. great. it happened in 2019. 20that's like four years ago i was cat in the sense that the the warnings with ka be for chi only not for adults but given all the weird sex offendery fos they arrested disney every year. i thought this was just part of the adult ride process with the wedgie and the mega cowabunga. >> whatever they offer. that's true. they always say whenever of a few they do a sweep. >> there's always a few disney where there's more than a few. yeah, that'skers bri interestin. well, i guess, you know, bees go to where there's honey. >> yeah, i don't know even that, but that's also not true. >> don't bees make honey? yes. well, you're not suppose make at to think too hard about this. >> i honestly did not. yes, they do make. >> honey, you are correct. thank you. yes, joe did this wedgie storyy remind you of high school? >> well honestly, greg, it's more of a combination wedgie squirrely kindgd of thing . >> and so, yes, it did for my high school, but i read that the husband is also suing for lossing for of consortium, whis i. which i think means that you can sue a business for noting ae being able to have means i'm going to be a billionaire. yeah. , and on that note. don't go away. ht back.we'll be back. t writers, but we help you shape your financial story. bu network connects globat l businesses across nearly 160 markets. >> we're not a startupr informae innovation labs use new technologies to help keep information secure. >> we're not architects, but we we build stronger communities. we're not just any bank. we are city sustainably caught atlantic salmon immunity boosting superfoods and powerful probiotics in every jinx is real dog foodat made by real dogio people attention. >> medicare has dexcom coverage for people with diabetes. for people with diabetes. if you have diabetes on dexcom, g7 is the single most important g7 is the single most important thing you ca it eliminates painful finger sticks, helps lower agency down discover about medicare. before using the dexcom g7, before using the dexcom g7, i was really won't see what stuck dexcom g7 sends you glucose numbers to your phone or dexcom receiver without painfuld becaun sticks. the arrow shows the direction your glucose is headinabout fog , my a1c has never been lower. i lead line dancing three times a week, and i'm just living a great life now. (woman) it's so easy to use. dexcom g7 has given me confidence and control that everything i need is right there on my phone. (female announcer) now, millions more are covered by medicare. take advantage of the expanded coverage by calling today. we are out of time. things to joe machi, kat timpf, my name is gg unafraid. here's laura. ♪ >> laura: i'm laura ingraham, this is "the ingraham angle" as