Theres an organic spore in my head that made me switch cliques so easily. No, you just kind of did it on your own. Oh, my god. This is so embarrassing. Uh, hang on. What i meant to say was, we just infiltrated the emo lair and we torched the plant leader. Oh. Oh [choking] iits me imim me again oh, my god, im all better. Thanks, you guys. Henrietta, i have dinner ready. Shut up, mom leave me alone, you conformist bag of demon jizz fatty. Leave memale announcer formist bafrom comedy centrals world news headquarters in new york. The daily show with trevor noah presents donsplaining. Do i hit the ball good . Do i hit it long . Is trump strong . People dont know it. Nobody knows what that means. Right . He knows what im talkin about. [light music] last night President Trump was at another campaign rally. This time in tampa, and, once again, he said something that left us going, huh . The time has come for voter id like everything else. Voter id. [cheers and applause] you know if you go out
And just so you know, we love corporations. Viacom, youre great. Keep doing what you do. Were really big fans here at the daily show, viacom. Mwah, love you. So the answer is obviously to hug these corporations close, and corporations are hugging right back google, kpmg, aetna, lyft not chickfila and here comes the true slay queen, walmart. [all cheering] is walmart gay . Walmart does take pride in their gay associates. As a company, i dont think you can label a company with a sexual orientation. Walmart seems like a top to me. Ii wouldi would agree with that. I think its amazing that so many people could come out and just live their truth as a marketable demographic. For sure, and theyve really made it, like, a safe for everybody, i think, for us too, so. Yeah, yeah, yeah, 100 . Its like, here i am. Im queer. I have a debit card. Everyones gay as hell now. And gays love money, bitch. You know that, so. So queer capitalism is totally chill. Actually, there is a specific issue with corp
lounge music playing on piano singing in dolphin clicks laughing car horns honking thudding hey, move it, buddy. intercom beeps intercom beeps what are you, deaf . intercom beeps oh, you have got to be kidding [trumpet fanfare] from comedy centrals world news headquarters in new york, the daily show with trevor noah presents your moment of them the best of jaboukie youngwhite. Hi, im jaboukie youngwhite, the daily shows senior rust belt correspondent. Jk, im gay, and so is pittsburgh. [upbeat techno music] its pride month, and equality march is the original pittsburgh pride. It has bikers, pups, pups, furries, queens, twunks, drunks, cops, bears, and fish creatures. Pittsburgh pride equality march is for everybody. It doesnt matter who you are, where you work, or who you love. And just so you know, we love corporations. Viacom, youre great. Keep doing what you do. Were really big fans here at the daily show, viacom. Mwah, love you. So the answer is obviously to hug these corporations c
He had the same look on his face that billy joel has when someone yells, play piano man. Why you already know it. [ laughter ] this mornings House Judiciary Committee testimony from special Counsel Robert Mueller ran behind schedule to the point the Committee Democrats were asked to limit their questioning time, because its not like mueller could further limit his answers. Yes no correct. True no correct. Thank you. Yes. [ laughter ] seth in a new interview, Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader ginsburg dismissed republican speculation about her health saying, quote, there was a senator who announced with great glee that i was going to be dead within six months. That senator whose name ive forgotten is now, himself, dead, and i am very much alive. [ laughter ] and thats how we learned rbg one time killed a guy. [ cheers and applause today was cousins day, or as Rudy Giuliani calls it, my anniversary [ laughter ] [ audience ohs ] hey, i mean. Theres got to be a price for doing it [ laughter
It was a day of recordsetting domination on the world stage for the us women. The defending champions posting the tournaments largest margin of victory ever, shutting out thailand 13 to nothing. Wow 13 to nothing. [cheers and applause] thats not a soccer score. America basically won by a touchdown, a field goal, and a threepointer combined. Like, they were dominating so hard, this was their goalie during the game. And its crazy cause if you ever watch soccer in the world, youre like, this is madness. Americans are like, this is how soccer should be i do feel a little bad though, all right, because this is the worst thing to ever happen to a thai soccer team, and yes, im including the one that got stuck in the cave. Yeah, cause at least the cave wasnt celebrating in front of them. You got all stuck in me so this was a historic win for the Us Womens Soccer Team, but some people say it mightve been a little too much winning. Critic say the team showed poor sportsmanship by continuing to s