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Transcripts For KPIX The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20240713

And prone to panic in third. And here comes does this cough mean anything . Does this cough mean anything on the outside track. And whats this . Charging from the back of the pack, maybe this will all just blow over coming on strong. Maybe this will all just blow over challenging for the lead. Oh, maybe this will all just blow over has bucked its rider and is running the other way. And its generalized anxiety by three lengths. Generalized anxiety takes the roses. Though its probably allergic. From all of me at churchill downs, im going to need another mint julep. Its a late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, cancel culture governor Chris Christie and musical guest nathaniel with jon batiste and stay homin. And now live on tape from a safe distance, its Stephen Colbert stephen oh, hi. Welcome to my perch up in the breeze. On monday, it was water. Yesterday, it was fire. So today, its the light show with stephen colbair. Im also up here among the trees, because i read on facebook that v

Transcripts For KNTV Late Night With Seth Meyers 20240713

Criticizing President Trumps conduct in office. All right, cool, but, you worked super closely with him for almost two years this is like, leaving a hospital job and saying, oh, by the way, dr. Friedman never washed his hands. [ laughter ] why are you just telling us now . Did dancing with the stars not call you back . I cant believe im going to say this, but i have more respect for scaramucci that dude was there for a week and a half, but hes been out here warning us about trump for two years. So [ laughter and applause so why dont you put your face back in your hand and carry it out to the garbage President Trump hinted yesterday that he may pardon his former adviser roger stone who was convicted as part of the russia investigation. Oh, come on, roger stone doesnt get pardoned from prison he escapes from it i mean, look at him. [ laughter ] like a 60s batman villain if he does get pardoned, this is what it will look like [ laughter ] attorney general [ applause ] attorney general wil

Transcripts For KGO Jimmy Kimmel Live 20240713

Now, this is from a horse race in tampa bay on saturday. And it would seem that we have a winner in our midst. King guillermo now going to the lead. Inside the final furlong, do you believe this . King guillermo. He wins impressively. Look, im a jockey jimmy i had no idea you were racing. Whats your horses name, guillermo . Pepe. [ laughter ] jimmy pepe. Its also his dogs name coincidentally. The coronavirus this coronavirus is all i hear about from whoo . [ laughter ] people are selling off stocks and buying up toilet paper. And if you are buying up toilet paper, i have a question. Why are you buying up toilet paper . I think youve got the body upside down because people are canceling events. The south by southwest festival in austin was canceled over the weekend. Theres talk they may hold nba games with no fans in the crowd. Italy the country is closed. For real. I try ton get too worked up about this sort of thing, but then i saw this headline over the weekend, and for me now this i

Transcripts For KNTV The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon 20240713

Matthew mcconaughey and hugh grant Vanessa Hudgens, musical guest Ashley Mcbryde and feating the legendary roots crew questlove 1190 steve and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause [ cheers and applause jimmy oh my goodness, hey. [ cheers and applause sounding great, everybody. Oh, my gosh. Welcome, welcome, welcome to the tonight show. Youre here. [ cheers and applause you made it. Thank you. Well you guys, this weekend a major winter storm is expected to hit the east coast and some places could get up to a foot of snow and just to be safe, President Trump announced that hes shutting down the senate until November Steve oh [ laughter ] jimmy lets get to the news trumps impeachment trial begins tuesday in the senate its pretty historic impeachment has only happened three times in 150 years its like seeing halleys comet or finding an employee at home depot. [ laughter ] today trump unveiled his whole defense team did you see what they look like yeah, it looks like if mens

Transcripts For KPIX The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20240713

About the strike have been lies . 80 are dishonest, and i mean really dishonest. Stephen so, why didnt you Tell Congress about the strike . Can you imagine . They want us to call up and speak to crooked corrupt politician adam schiff. Oh, adam, we have somebody that we have been trying to get for a long time stephen oooh, oooh, oooh i love improv let me be schiff. Hello, this is adam schiff. What do you want now, mr. President . Could we meet . Stephen meet . Lets see hmm, today is not good. Im pretending to talk to the president. Lets do it in a couple of days. Stephen now pretend im lou dobbs and i say, lou, heres the problem stephen is the problem that youre president of the United States and youre getting advice from lou dobbs . laughter shifting gears. The Oscar Nominations came out this morning, sir. Can you believe that beyonce was snubbed for best original song . I just have such respect for the queen, i dont think this should be happening to her. laughter stephen yeah. Back to

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