CANTON, OH Responding with the excitement of someone who appeared to genuinely believe they were some kind of outlier, local white person Hannah Michaels seemed way too proud that she was using WhatsApp, sources reported Wednesday. “Oh my gosh, of course I use WhatsApp I’ve actually had it for years, since I studied…
LOS ANGELES Sharing horrifying and riveting tales with friends who did not grow up in the Midwest, local 29-year-old Iris Pearson fondly recalled a beloved grade school tradition called “Slave Days” this week, according to sources. “Oh, man, Slave Days were the best part of fifth grade–I think at one point I had over…
NEW YORK Interrupting testimony as they walked straight up to the former president mid-trial, the Trump boys baked a cake for their father with a gavel hidden inside, court room sources confirmed Wednesday. “We think you’ll find this cake very yummy and full of law hammers,” Donald Trump, Jr. said with a wink as his…
While police are well trained to shoot unarmed civilians, plant evidence, and file for overtime, dealing with larger-scale events like arresting several hundred college students can be more daunting. The following are the best practices law enforcement should follow when clearing political protests and demonstrations.
SACRAMENTO, CA In a daily forecast that took note of a warm front moving into the area with a hot, damp mass of air, horny television meteorologist Troy Pruett advised local residents to bring a white T-shirt Wednesday in case it rained. “We expect these rain showers to continue all afternoon and into the evening, so…