And democrats living abroad said, one democrat abroad, leave me out of this. [ light laughter ] former congressman beto orourke appeared at a Joe Biden Rally in dallas yesterday and announced his endorsement in spanish then out of habit, biden said, that sounds good, ill have that. [ laughter and applause Election Officials in multiple states are encouraging voters to use mailin ballots due to the coronavirus. That story again, several states are fighting coronavirus by asking people to put their saliva in the mail [ laughter and applause just send it out, just get it out of there [ cheers and applause former new york mayor Mike Bloomberg said yesterday that he would vote for senator Bernie Sanders if he was the democratic nominee but, quote, would not be happy doing it. Yeah we know. Youre [ laughter ] youre never happy [ light laughter ] you always look like youre on your way either to or from a colonoscopy. [ laughter ] msnbc anchor Chris Matthews abruptly announced his retirement y
Criticizing President Trumps conduct in office. All right, cool, but, you worked super closely with him for almost two years this is like, leaving a hospital job and saying, oh, by the way, dr. Friedman never washed his hands. [ laughter ] why are you just telling us now . Did dancing with the stars not call you back . I cant believe im going to say this, but i have more respect for scaramucci that dude was there for a week and a half, but hes been out here warning us about trump for two years. So [ laughter and applause so why dont you put your face back in your hand and carry it out to the garbage President Trump hinted yesterday that he may pardon his former adviser roger stone who was convicted as part of the russia investigation. Oh, come on, roger stone doesnt get pardoned from prison he escapes from it i mean, look at him. [ laughter ] like a 60s batman villain if he does get pardoned, this is what it will look like [ laughter ] attorney general [ applause ] attorney general wil
Nothing is everything mahatma gandhis former home said trump, cool, wheres he ask your dermatologist about skyrizi. Live now . [ laughter ] nicer place . [ light laughter ] disgraced movie mogul, Harvey Weinstein was convicted hundred bands in my pocket, its on me today in a Sexual Assault trial. Ah, you mean the walker didn on me yeah, your grandmama probably know me know me work its a moment when i show up, got em sayin, wow [ laughter ] oh, man, hes really, really new doritos flamin hot limon. Going to have to [ cheers and applause i lied. As a strategy, hes going to have to step it up at sentencing it dramatic choir music up, dramatic choir music and just arrive in a hearse. [ laughter ] President Trump on friday dramatic choir music attacked the south korean movie parasite for winning oscar for best picture and claimed, it should only have been allowed to compete in the foreign film category. Yeah, because if you want to do its the rush of relaxation. Business in the the united sh
Sentenced to seven to nine years in prison for lying to congress. Then today, the department of justice issued a statement calling for much less prison time for stone and trump said that he had the right to tell the Justice Department what to do. Then all four prosecutors in the stone case resigned in protest and then, trump called for the military to pursue legal action against Lieutenant Colonel Alexander Vindman for testifying against him in the impeachment trial. And Senate Republicans blocked three bills to prevent foreign interference in our elections. And Lindsey Graham and don junior showed up on fox news in matching trump merch. [ light laughter ] i guess what im telling you is, by this time tomorrow we might be a cooking show. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause multipsigned today after the jue department announced plans to reduce their sentencing recommendation for former trump adviser roger stone. Pretty unsurprising for someone who looks like the get out of jail free card [
President joe biden won by nearly 30 points said biden, thank you, south dakota [ laughter ] mayor Pete Buttigieg announced yesterday he is dropping out of the president ial race. Come back in four years, said a bouncer who carded him at a bar. [ laughter ] following joe bidens win in South Carolina, tom steyer, Pete Buttigieg and Amy Klobuchar suspended their campaigns for president. So, whos left now all right, great now just [ laughter ] just add Morgan Freeman and you can make a crappy movie called one last heist or something. [ laughter and applause former [ cheers and applause one last heist. Former Vice President joe biden said yesterday that he raised over 5 million in the 24 hours after his victory in this weekends South Carolina primary, but then quickly lost it [ laughter ] just give me one more mil i almost got it. [ laughter ] yesterday was Justin Biebers 26th birthday. Youre only [ applause ] hm [ cheers and applause [ laughter ] push through despite your applause, im goi