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Transcripts For FOXNEWS Gutfeld 20240921

[cheering and applause] [cheering and applause] yes, all right! yes! let not your be troubled. It is friday so you know what that means, let s welcome tonight s guest. She has witnessed more fights than a cashier at a waffle house , charlie! [cheering and applause] greg: if it seems like he is judging you, that s his job, comedian vince august! [cheering and applause] greg: her husband tried to convince her that talking is bad for the baby. New york times bestselling author, cat! [cheering and applause] greg: and you need sir edmund hillary to see if he has dandruff. New york times bestselling author, comedian and former nwa world champion, tyrus! [cheering and applause] all right all right, all right. Before we get to some news stories, let s do this. greg leftovers! greg: it is leftovers where i read the jokes we didn t use this weekend is always it is my first time reading them so if they suck we will by joe a pager from one of our jewish friends in tel aviv. [laughter] greg: te

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Transcripts For FOXNEWS Gutfeld 20240914

Greg: all right, all right. Still it s never enough. It s friday see you know what that means let s welcome tonight s guests. Is so white so white craps. Fox news contributor tom shillue she is so southern she was baptized with mountain dew. Katie mcdowell! ladies would love to try his rocky mountain oysters, chef andrew grewal. And although no longer a cheerleader she is is still commuting by cartwheel. Host of outnumbered emily compiled you all right so before we get to some news stories let s do this. [ ] greg the leftovers. . . Yum. This is where i read the jokes we didn t use this week as always is my first time reading them if they suck we will address joe mott she as a goose and send him to springfield ohio. Today is friday the 13th. To celebrate haitians in springfield are only eating black cats. Donald trump told the new york post that he s done debating we are still waiting for a new offer from his opponent. Cancelled debate is a tough break for nbc who announced their new

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Transcripts For FOXNEWS Gutfeld 20240907

[ cheering and applause ] greg: yes! all right. Okay. [ cheering and applause ]. Greg: i guess that will do! (laughter). Greg: it is friday, so you know what that means, let s welcome tonight s guest, he is so bland, he is getting sued by rice cakes. Cohost of fox and friends, tyro! he is a lawyer named trustie, like a cop named friskie. Former trump attorney, and doj prosecutor. If you bont buy her new book, she will have to learn how to cook, a fox news contributor, kat. He is stronger than gravity, and puts up with my dipravity! [ cheering and applause ]. Greg: yes. Yes. All right. Before we get to some new stories, let s to this: [ ] greg s leftovers. Greg: all right, it is leftovers, where i read the jokes we didn t use this week. And as always, it is my first time making them. The movie beetle juice beetle juice opens in theatres today, about a dead guy that wants to return to the land of the living. (laughter). Greg: that s a blot that sounds really familiar. [ cheering and a

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Transcripts For FOXNEWSW Gutfeld 20240705

thateverybody shirt. it s friday, so you know what that means. . let s welcome tonight s guests like a genie. she can also fit in a bottle. co-host of america s newsroom in the five, dana perino. ino. hide him from your wives, kil because they ll probably kill themselves. comedianl joe, he s my third favorite, lou. after breakout and. comedian author of that joke isn t funny anymore. read and she does her best lifting at the gym where she steals purses in the locker room. new york times best selling author. right. som yeah. okay. before we get to some nenewsw l. do this. greg s leftovers. yeah, me? th it s leftovers where i read the jokes that we didn t use this week. and asuse always it s my first time reading them. so if they , we ll throw macn into a meat grinder and make mac meatballs, and then, of course, feed them to steve doocy. all right, here, go.st first medical research to say nose picking can lead to memory. loss. i really don t have to sayking anything.

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Transcripts For FOXNEWSW Gutfeld 20240705

greg: yes, it s friday and you know what that means, huh? i really have to go to the bathroom. but i m not. i m going to wait until it s over. let s welcome tonight s guests. this early bird sure is special, fox and friends first cohost carley shimkus! [cheers and applause] greg: believe it or not, he s the only guy on the show tonight named hotep, youtube host hotep jesus! [cheers and applause]. greg: he looks like the guy who came to cut down your trees. comedian jim florentine! [cheers and applause] greg: and, finally, she s the first author to weigh less than her book, fox news contributor kat timpf! [cheers and applause] greg: all right. yeah, lively bunch tonight. okay, before we get to some new stories it s friday. so let s do this. greg leftovers. greg: yeah, it s leftovers where i read the jokes we didn t use this week and as always it s my first time reading these, so if they suck we ll just chemically castrate joe mackey. not that it would make a

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