Chestnuts pretty fogood [cheers and applause] democrats in the house made donald trump only the third person, president ever to be impeached. This morning he woke up on the floor next to his tanning bed and tweeted the words i got impeached last might. Yes, and our Long National mightmare continues. Not a single republican voted for impeachment, which means they either really like donald trump or really hate mike pence. But the debate went on well into the night. Trump was in battle creek, michigan when the vote happened, pepping himself up with a rally. And this is what the president was talking about when the Impeachment Vote was coming in. The dish washer, you press it. Thered be an explosion. Five minutes later, you open it up, the steam pours out, now you press it 12 times. Women tell me, again, they give you four drops of water, and theyre in places where theres so much water they dont know what to do would it. Jimmy okay, fwrand mgrand ,e to hang up the phone now. Trump also las
President trump was impeached today. Though i think its a little like having a raccoon in your garage and poking it with a broom. Its still there, its just mad now. President trump was on twitter during todays Impeachment Vote and accused democrats of carrying out quote an assault on america and an assault on the Republican Party filled with atrocious lies by the radical left. [ laughter ] i feel like we elected a 2 00 a. M. Mattress commercial as president. Why do you always have to use all caps honestly i cant wait until trump is finally out of office and the only time we see all caps is when joe biden smiles. [ laughter ] according to a new report, women worldwide will not receive equal pay to men until the year 2277 in that case, let it all burn, [ cheers and applause a new study has found that iceland is the most genderequal country in the world, because it turns out its pretty hard to discriminate based on gender when everyones wearing 12 layers. [ laughter ] the Motion Picture a
Kimmel live. I am your guest host for the night. Brie larson. [cheers and applause] thank you. Jimmy couldnt be here tonight. Hes recovering at home. And jimmy, if youre watching, were thinking of you, and wish you the best of luck with your new butt implants. Actually, jimmy had a big primetime special with norman lear tonight. So he asked me to fill in. He told me to make myself at home. So i went into his office, took off my bra, and drunkordered a bunch of quilts on etsy. This is an interesting place to come into work. Right outside that door is the hollywood walk of fame, which is overflowing with tourists and people dressed as superheroes. Today i got to see what captain marvel would look like as a chainsmoking old man in a wig. Yeah, and it as still kinda hot. 2019 has been pretty big for me. [cheers and applause] thank you. Between captain marvel and avengers endgame, my films grossed almost 4 billion dollars this year. [cheers and applause] yeah. And tonight, im getting 800 bu
Should not pick the next president of the united states. Mr. Mayor, your response. You know, according to forbes magazine, im literally the only person on this stage who is not a millionaire or a billionaire. And joe biden fighting back after being mocked for stuttering. Breaking news in the case of that missing texas mom and her baby. Authorities surround a home in houston right now. Abc news exclusive. Pat sajak speaking out in his first interview since his medical emergency. You go in and they dont know if im coming out. What it was like seeing vanna white take control of the wheel and what hes saying about leaving the show only on gma. And feeling the force. The starliner rocket blasting off moments ago. Weve cleared the tower. This as star wars blasts into theaters. Troops getting an early screening. Fans lining up all night and now the breakout star is joining us live. And good morning, america. Happy friday. Happy holiday friday. Happy star wars friday. The day is finally here.
We are in the wrong bodies myjoints feel like butter. I feel loose myself. Dwayne johnson and jack black are back in body swap sequel jumanji the next level. See what mark kermode thinks of that in the film review. After weeks of campaigning, voting is under way in the general election. This morning, the Party Leaders were out casting their ballots. Its the third election in less than five years, and the first to be held in december for nearly a century. The first results are expected before midnight. Heres our Political Correspondent ben wright and a warning his report includes some flashing images. Voting began at seven oclock this morning. The prime minister, borisjohnson, had some canine company as he cast his ballot at this polling station in westminster. Have you all got your pictures, are you all right . Thank you. The labour leader, jeremy corbyn, posed for the cameras too after voting in his north london constituency. It was dawn in scotland when the liberal democrat leader, j