We have a lot did discuss including the bachelor. Bachelor peter is here tonight. You know those people who resolve to exercise and eat healthy . You probably did. Every year. I didnt make a new years resolution this year but my wife made new years resolutions for me. Shouldnt this year my new years resolution for you is, and she went on to mention areas in which she would like me to improve. I didnt say anything. But that is allowed . [ laughter ] can you make a resolution for someone else . I dont think so. I think its a selfonly thing. Its like flossing, you dont floss with other people. You can, you just dont. If someone else makes it, i dont think it technically counts as a resolution. I think thats an intervention. There are no joint resolutions for new years. They have to be made by the person who is subject to them, right . Bottom line, im a lazy monster who is incapable of change. The sooner my wife accepts that, the easier both of our lives is going to be. [ cheers and applau
The nominees for the 92nd annual Academy Awards were revealed. It was a big day for 1917. The year, not the movie. Though the movie too. [ laughter ] 19 of the 20 acting nominees are white people. No women were nominated for best director. Thats fewer minorities than in Donald Trumps cabinet. [ laughter ] the movie cats got shut out. So no cats were even nominated. Actually, universal, the studio that made cats, pulled the movie from oscar contention. Which is always funny. They probably didnt need to do that. [ laughter ] thats like mike pence pulling out of contention for a soul train award. Its unnecessary. Double congratulations to Scarlett Johansson who got her first and second ever nominations today. [ cheers and applause ] for Marriage Story and jojo rabbit. Best supporting actress and best actress. Renee zellweger was also nominated for best actress for her role as judy garland in the biopic judy. Which as far as i know does not exist. No one i know has seen that movie. [ laugh
The latest on the series of quakes in recent days. Heavy damages and massive Power Outages reported. Live reports just ahead. Ready to talk. A bombshell reversal, from the president s former National Security adviser. Why john bolton says hes prepared to testify at the impeachment trial. Those stories, plus, the new charges against Harvey Weinstein in los angeles, as his criminal trial begins in new york. Race against time, a race to save the animals in the wild of that are ravaging that country. It hurts. It hurts. And big changes for youtube. The Major Overhaul rolled out for videos made for children. What your kids wont see when they log in. Today, tuesday, january 7th, 2020. From nbc news, this is today, with Savannah Guthrie and hoda kotb, live from studio 1a in rockefeller plaza. Welcome to today. Thank you for joining us on this Tuesday Morning. A busy news morning it is. Were going to get right to our top story. Huge crowds in iran for the funeral of the countrys most powerful
Im gonna need you to put down your shovel. Sure, its morbid, but its also inspiring. My parents are still alive. [audience groans] but they could go any day now. [audience cheers] so i bought them adjoining plots at a cemetery. Now i have another reason to get excited for their passing because ive incorporated two of my favorite things massages and cinnabons. [somber piano music] miss you guys every day. How you doing today, daniel . Great. Thanks for asking, pete. [grunts] [moans] thats good, pete. Sorry, mom. Im sure youre rolling over in your grave because i got a hot dude rubbing my knots. [bell dings] thats it . Nope. That just means a fresh batch of cinnabons is ready. Ooh. [sultry music] [sniffs] thanks for the happy ending, dad. Oh, youll have to flip over for that. Pete. Are you ready . Good night. [applause] Comedy Central from Comedy Centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with trevor noah. cheers and applause . Trevor welcome to the daily show,
For two days straight, and then finally i thought about stans moms boobs and this little tiny splooch of this white stuff came out thats great, butters, but were not playing detective anymore. Were playing laundromat owners. Would you like those pants cleaned for 4. 95 . Captioning by captionmax www. Captionmax. Com from comedy centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with trevor noah. cheers and applause trevor welcome to the daily show, everybody. Thank you so much for tuning in. Thank you for coming out. As always, thank you so much for coming out. Im trevor noah. We have two guests, two guests joining us tonight. First, her new memoir is about her search for redemption in americas prison system. Cyntoia brownlong will be joining us, everybody cheers and applause and then after that, were going to chat with a superstar comedian and an actor who is out with her first book. Ali wong is going to be on the show cheers and applause also on tonights show, china