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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20240713

And thank you for coming out, thank you so much. Wow. So amazing. Our guest tonight,ure guest tonight is an awardwinning author and truly a fantastic writer whose new book is you will kad red at the bone, it is going to be a wonderful conversation. Jacqueline woodson is going to be joining us, everybody. For conversation, you want to stay tuned for that. Also on tonights show, alligators could be joining the Border Patrol, Vladimir Putin exposes a secret and donald trump is getting impeached. cheers and applause thank you, thank you, yes, thank you, i have, yeah, i have thank you, so lets catch up on todays headlines. Lets kick it off with the story that has been blowing upjohn line today, it involves a zoo, a fence and a woman who has seen the lion king way too many times. From the category of lucky to be alive, take a look at this video of a woman who crossed the safety barrier at the bronx zoo here in no and had a close encount we are a lion. The animal kept to itself but the zoo sa

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20240713

Im gonna need you to put down your shovel. Sure, its morbid, but its also inspiring. My parents are still alive. [audience groans] but they could go any day now. [audience cheers] so i bought them adjoining plots at a cemetery. Now i have another reason to get excited for their passing because ive incorporated two of my favorite things massages and cinnabons. [somber piano music] miss you guys every day. How you doing today, daniel . Great. Thanks for asking, pete. [grunts] [moans] thats good, pete. Sorry, mom. Im sure youre rolling over in your grave because i got a hot dude rubbing my knots. [bell dings] thats it . Nope. That just means a fresh batch of cinnabons is ready. Ooh. [sultry music] [sniffs] thanks for the happy ending, dad. Oh, youll have to flip over for that. Pete. Are you ready . Good night. [applause] Comedy Central from Comedy Centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with trevor noah. cheers and applause . Trevor welcome to the daily show,

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20240713

Writer whose new book is you will kad red at the bone, it is going to be a wonderful conversation. Jacqueline woodson is going to be joining us, everybody. For conversation, you want to stay tuned for that. Also on tonights show, alligators could be joining the Border Patrol, Vladimir Putin exposes a secret and donald trump is getting impeached. cheers and applause thank you, thank you, yes, thank you, i have, yeah, i have thank you, so lets catch up on todays headlines. Lets kick it off with the story that has been blowing upjohn line today, it involves a zoo, a fence and a woman who has seen the lion king way too many times. From the category of lucky to be alive, take a look at this video of a woman who crossed the safety barrier at the bronx zoo here in no and had a close encount we are a lion. The animal kept to itself but the zoo said the womans action was unlawful and could have resulted in serious injury or death. You have to wonder what the lion is thinking here. Trevor oh, i

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20240713

Our little angel. Yes. Oh, hes so beautiful i know its been hard on both of us, losing poor kenny. But this knew baby kind of reminds me of him. What should we name him . Well, seeing as though kenny passed away, maybe we should name him, uh. Kenny. Yes. Kenny is such a great name. My little kenny, a brandnew kenny. [gurgling] god, this must have been the 50th time this has happened. 52nd. [man singing in french] Comedy Central from Comedy Centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with trevor noah. cheers and applause . Trevor welcome to the daily show, everybody, im trevor noah. Thank you so much for tuning in. And thank you for coming out, thank you so much. Wow. So amazing. Our guest tonight,ure guest tonight is an awardwinning author and truly a fantastic writer whose new book is you will kad red at the bone, it is going to be a wonderful conversation. Jacqueline woodson is going to be joining us, everybody. For conversation, you want to stay tuned for th

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