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Transcripts For KNTV Late Night With Seth Meyers 20240712

[ cheers and applause announcer tonight, on late night with seth meyers Cecily Strong, author of the captain, former mlb all star, david wright writer and director of kajillionaire, miranda july, featuring the 8g band with jessica berdeaux and now, Seth Meyers Seth good evening. Im seth meyers. This is late night. Hows everybody doing tonight . Great, lets get to the news President Trump said yesterday that he won tuesdays president ial debate against former Vice President , joe biden, but take it with a grain of salt because he also said he won the voice. Fox news anchor and president ial debate moderator, Chris Wallace, said in an interview yesterday that he was surprised by the chaotic nature of tuesdays contest, adding no one could have predicted, quote, this was going to be the president s strategy not just for the beginning of the debate but the entire debate. I had an inkling, said marco rubio, ted cruz, jeb bush, carly fiorian, hillary clinton, all of his kids, all of his wives

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Transcripts For KNTV Late Night With Seth Meyers 20240712

With stripes and cut away over the place. Coats for perfect fits puttin on the ritz maybe trump should stick to interrupting when he actually has to answer a question, he sounds like the dressed up like a worst member of your taboo team. Million dollar trooper trying hard to loo its a movie, they live in like gary cooper forest cities, computers all superduper over the place [ buzzer ] it was star wars, but its not my fault i wasnt allowed to say star or wars. Evens trumps own campaign acknowledged privately that he went full psycho at the debate one person whos familiar with his debate prep, anderson, said announcer tonight, on they prepared him to be late night with seth meyers aggressive but not to be jason Cecily Strong, from friday the 13th, and that author of the captain, former is the perception of how his performance was. Mlb all star, david wright writer and director of seth yeah. Kajillionaire, miranda july, i mean, even jason didnt interrupt that much unless you featuring th

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Transcripts For KNTV The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon 20240712

You can beat every bear in the forest, but the game is never finished. Steve from Rockefeller Center in the heart of new york city, its the tonight show starring jimmy fallon. Tonight, join jimmy and his guests Seth Macfarlane, Evan Rachel Wood penn and teller, and featuring the legendary roots crew theyve really stood the test of time. And now, heres your host, jimmy fallon much like these majestic rocky mountains. Which must be named after the. That would be rocky the flying squirrel, mr. Gecko sir. Obviously ahh come on bullwinkle, theyre named after. Our first president george rockington [ cheers and applause that doesnt even make any sense. Mr. Uhh. Winkle. Jimmy hey. Oh, thank you very much roots. Geico. Over 75 years of savings and service. Thank you, everybody, for tuning in and watching the tonight show. I appreciate it. Lets get to the news and jokes. Well, guys, today is september 17th i point that out because once again President Trump has contradicted one of his medical ex

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Transcripts For COM The 20240703

[cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] desi hello welcome to the daily show im desi lydic. Weve got so much to talk about tonight. Ireland facetimes new york, eric adams just keeps getting weirder, and chatgpt is coming for your man. But first, the trump trial is back in session, so its time for another installment of americas most tremendously wanted. [cheers and applause] the whole thing is a scam. Desi donald trump is entering his second month of the trial, and his courthouse is becoming a pilgrimage site for all of his supporters and wannabe vps. This week alone, we saw vivek ramaswamy, j. D. Vance, mike johnson, and whoever this guy is. Its like the met gala for people who dont believe in womens rights. [applause] [cheers and applause] yep. But of all the people who came out to support trump, nobody and i mean nobody did it weirder than alabama senator tommy tuberville. First of all, im disappointed in the courtroom. It is depressing. That courtroom is depressing. This is new

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Transcripts For COM The 20240703

[cheers and applause] desi hello welcome to the daily show im desi lydic. Weve got so much to talk about tonight. Ireland facetimes new york, eric adams just keeps getting weirder, and chatgpt is coming for your man. But first, the trump trial is back in session, so its time for another installment of americas most tremendously wanted. [cheers and applause] the whole thing is a scam. Desi donald trump is entering his second month of the trial, and his courthouse is becoming a pilgrimage site for all of his supporters and wannabe vps. This week alone, we saw vivek ramaswamy, j. D. Vance, mike johnson, and whoever this guy is. Its like the met gala for people who dont believe in womens rights. [applause] [cheers and applause] yep. But of all the people who came out to support trump, nobody and i mean nobody did it weirder than alabama senator tommy tuberville. First of all, im disappointed in the courtroom. It is depressing. That courtroom is depressing. This is new york city, icon of ou

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