[ laughter and applause [ laughter ] clickety, clackety, like little [ laughter ] have you never met a dog before . [ indiscernible seth she does. Yeah, i know. Man, dogs are for petting, seth to be fair, she does clickety clack a lot thats a fair hit. Multiple districts in iowa had booties are for shaking. Yeah. [ light laughter ] frisbee is like kramer, where to settle ties at last nights were like he cant enter the caucus by coin flip. Then, a zoo in england recently room without like sliding around discovered that their big cats [ laughter ] people still use those things . Are more active in their said Michael Bloomberg [ laughter and applause seth shes always like burst environment if you spray in with her new invention. Calvin kleins obsession for men. Then go [ indiscernible [ laughter ] former new york mayor Mike Bloomberg today announced and i was like, what seth Brooklyn Ninenine coming back. He is doubling his spending on thats not a surprise. Coming back seth very exciting
And walked off stage [ laughter ] despite President Trump claiming that athletes and protesters have disrespected the national anthem, video surfaced from trumps Super Bowl Party showing him fidgeting, pointing and pretending to conduct an orchestra during the song. Take a look. And the rockets red glare the bombs bursting in air [ laughter ] seth oh my god, youre the leader of the free world and you look like a 5yearold kid an hour into a catholic mass [ laughter ] do you have to [ applause ] i mean, seriously, do you have to pee or something . Well, you should have thought of that before you went insane. [ laughter ] the New Hampshire primary is now a week away, which means were only a few short months from finding out who won iowa [ laughter and applause multiple districts in iowa had to settle ties at last nights caucus by coin flip. People still use those things . Said Michael Bloomberg [ laughter and applause former new york mayor Mike Bloomberg today announced he is doubling his
Jimmy hi, hi. Very nice. Hi, everyone. Im the host, im jimmy. Thanks for watching. Thanks for coming. Im very glad you are here. Im glad you are here. Glad you are enthusiastic. We have a starlordstudded show tonight. Cast of guardian of the galaxy volume 2 and a clip from the movie which they will share with us for free. [ cheers and applause ] tonights show, weird if they made you pay for just a piece of the movie for the clip. But they will not. Tonights show will be just like a marvel movie, jokes, action, at the end you will sit there thinking theres more, right, theres got to be Something Else . I saw the movie, we got an advanced screening, our staff did. Its great, i like it even better than the first one. Everyone loved it. If you are going to see one movie in which Bradley Cooper plays a raccoon this year, this would be it. This would be it. [ cheers and applause ] all of that to look forward to. For those of you celebrating this weekend, hope you had a happy easter. We had a
Been to our planet in 400 years. Thats the one that almost got us. That son of a bitch. Look at it, its enormous. 2,000 feet. Just to give you an idea, thats about seven football fields. Its the only way i know how to measure anything is how many football fields. Show of hands, who would be okay with an asteroid hitting us right now . At this point it would be no . At the white house today President Trump hosted the super bowl champion new england patriots. You know they were lucky to catch the president. Its wednesday. Usually hes on his way to the maralago for the weekend. [ laughter ] they did show up. Not only did the players meet with the president , one of them made a surprise appearance at sean spicers daily press briefing. He said that on nafta he wants very big changes. Are we going to get rid of it once and for all . Are we at that point . Like very big changes i think well see what pans out in the negotiation. Think theres an option can i just need some help . I think i got
Jimmy hi, hi. Very nice. Hi, everyone. Im the host, im jimmy. Thanks for watching. Thanks for coming. Im very glad you are here. Im glad you are here. Glad you are enthusiastic. We have a starlordstudded show tonight. Cast of guardian of the galaxy volume 2 and a clip from the movie which they will share with us for free. [ cheers and applause ] tonights show, weird if they made you pay for just a piece of the movie for the clip. But they will not. Tonights show will be just like a marvel movie, jokes, action, at the end you will sit there thinking theres more, right, theres got to be Something Else . I saw the movie, we got an advanced screening, our staff did. Its great, i like it even better than the first one. Everyone loved it. If you are going to see one movie in which Bradley Cooper plays a raccoon this year, this would be it. This would be it. [ cheers and applause ] all of that to look forward to. This weekend, hope you had a happy easter. We had a picnic, family picnic. The w