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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20240714

From comedy centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with trevor noah. cheers and applause trevor welcome to the daily show, everybody thank you so much for tuning in thank you for coming out im trevor noah our guest tonight is a a former daily show correspondent, now appearing in the rook on starz olivia munn is joining us. Olivia munn is joining us, everybody cheers and applause but before that, weve got to get into the news. Lets be honest, for the past few days, weve mainly been focused on three stories, america versus iran, Migrant Children at the border, and the latest supersmash brothers release, the democratic primary race. laughter yes. My favorite move is the joe biden death mas sabling. Even though those are the main stories, there are tons of other stories happening in the news. The truth is we just dont have the time to talk about them. Luckily, not enough time is just the right amount of time for a segment we call aint nobody got time for that.

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20240714

Okay. Hi, everybody. Were back. So pretty much theyre [bleep], and they would hear screams from george layhe. Help, im gonna die. John is like, george, everythings gonna be fine. Justjust keep your chin up. Literally. Hes like, thats a terrible thing to say. And he [bleep] drowned in this shit. Takes everyone four hours trying to save them. 21 people drowned. 150 people were injured because of this, and the next day, john barrys hair turned completely white, and the people, they were trying to say, like, okay, whos to blame . Is thisi burped while i said this. Whos to blame . And of course theyre just like, pfft, not us. [chuckles] good night, everybody. [blows raspberry] the cleanup took 87,000 man hours. The harbor for six months was just brown with molasses, so even to this day on a really hot day the people still claim that they can smell molasses in boston. It [bleep] boston up. Arthur jell did not get fired. Arthur jell got promoted. That guy had a great [bleep] life while other

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20240714

Focused on three stories, america versus iran, Migrant Children at the border, and the latest supersmash brothers release, the democratic primary race. laughter yes. My favorite move is the joe biden death mas sabling. Even though those are the main stories, there are tons of other stories happening in the news. The truth is we just dont have the time to talk about them. Luckily, not enough time is just the right amount of time for a segment we call aint nobody got time for that. cheers and applause all right, lets kick it off with student debt. These crippling College Loans are the reason that youre probably watching the the daily show right now, using your neighbors wifi. laughter but there could be a new way to become debt free just dont pay. All student debt gone in six months. This is a new plan proposed by senator bernie sanders, the college of all acts would create a new tax on wall street transactions using that money to free some 45 million americans from more than a trillion

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20240714

Come on, man. Whatwhathow much more well, what happened to them after derderek, dont say nothing. Yeah, i just want to get what itstheyre in siberia. Theyre blasting flares out. Ptoo ptoo they dont even have food, or sprites. And then, after 30 hours, they fi [bottle thuds] finally they got rescued. [triumphant music] you wouldnt even believe it. [chuckles] oh theyre just some lunatics that said yes to an experiment. Cosmonauts, astronauts, any kind of naut. Did, yes. The nauts yessed. The nauts said, why not . [laughs] where dawhere da where da button . Where da button . [patriotic music] from comedy centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with trevor noah. cheers and applause trevor welcome to the daily show, everybody thank you so much for tuning in thank you for coming out im trevor noah our guest tonight is a a former daily show correspondent, now appearing in the rook on starz olivia munn is joining us. Olivia munn is joining us, everybody cheers and

Constables convicted on lesser count after charges dismissed

Constables convicted on lesser count after charges dismissed
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