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tina feyey: the amererican worke is our h home in manany ways. [crashsh] liliz: where s my s sandwich?!!!! reason to geget yoyou guys arere working h for r once. ththe americanan workplacece is home i in up in ththe momany w whehere is my sanandwich! we alall need a reason n to up i in the e morning. t the americacan office is iconic. . howow many peopople can i fi nine. you are picking a healthcare plan. we will table back that for the time being. you have spunk. i i hate spununk. terririble workmates.s. dututies not [ bleep ] back? no. > everybodydy trying toto ge alonong. o one problemem with hiririn womemen is that they a are frar and breakakable. is it probabable to thihink ababout lightbtbulbs or yoyour hilarious. w what do youou say to ththa? what is a tough about earning a living? have you ever done it? no, but i could. lucille ball with the chocolates, alwaways funny. there i is the packing g roo unwrapped. you a ....
and ththen twist i it somewhe. i just can t believe the way people are. whatat is it witith humanity? what k kind of a w world dodo we live i in? andederson: you re notot alone, ulultimate. i think ththat s whatt the cocomic s sayiying. rereality is t the fodder r fory because it s what we have. so wherere else can n we find cy if not i in real lifife? david: as opposed to what, fake life? you know. life is real. yeah, we got that. first, a philosophical question. have you ever noticed when you re driving that anyone who s driving slower than you is an idiot? [ laughter, applause ] and anyone driving faster than you is a maniac! you see a million things a day in your life, anand they allll go onon the back k burner of your r six-burnerer wolf, ridiculoususly priced d mind. a comedianan comes outut and brs it to the front buburner. i dodon t like other peopople s showewers. there s always a problem with temperature adjustment. there s always a little hair stuck on ....
at thehe present time, w wew ththere s 27 p people missssing abouout 4:4:15 yesteterday afte. still n no o break k in that chchowchilla, californrnia schc bus kidnappiping. 2 26 school c children anand bus driviver have vavanished. vanisished yesterdaday after nenear chowcwchilla, califororn. prpresident foford directeted t atattorney geneneral to ususe a availalable governrnment resour. > the californinia nationalad jojoins state,e, local pololice the fbfbi i in a giant s search the e children a and thehe drir. > it was like somebody come down f from m mars andnd just t them u up off the plplanet. > was i it anan o outright kidnappingng? a psycychopath o or a sesex man the e loose? > whoever d did it put t a g deal of plananning and effort a you u might evenen say mononey. may nevever have been as anguisishing a mysteryry. it t s the worsrst kind o of you can tell. being buried alive is our worst fear. > the c chowchilla kikids sh the world what c childh ....
- whwhiskey. where s ololiver? [cat meoeows] oliverer, come on!n! i helped pick the winners. i gagave some tickets to some e friends ofof mine and fafamily membebers whwho needed i it. i wawanted them m happy, so. i gave em things. i was s gonna gett the $1 million, but i gaveve it to my y fathe. and, u um. maybe ifif certain t things never happppened. this monopoly thingg would still bebe going on n t. it s true.e. [draramatic musisic] - with s shamrock prproductios and d the reuninion of winnnne i think sosome of themem are prpretty legenendary, in terms o of whatat was captutured on fil. - - like buddydy fisher and mr. . hoover, gloria brorown was anan instant $ $1 million n win. she hahad won in s south carol. - gloria had said her r address was in t the hilton n head area of soututh carolinana, but she wawas from jacksonvnville, flororida. there wawas always s somethg thatat i was tryrying toto drive outut. i was s trying to o expand thes ththat they wewere ....