here she is in the greenroom getting the party started early. >> [laughing]. >> greg: and the great comedian jamie is here. he came from the show biz mecca alaska. he will use any excuse to move that state like looking for daylight. eskimos have 50 different words for snow and 150 for don't book jamie. here he is leaving his house in alaska. >> [laughing]. >> holy crap! >> greg: the last few hours of 2021 and so much has happened, i thought we could break down how the year panned out. all we want to do is go home and snuggle up with a bottle of cold duck and a sex doll. like everyballot we are mailing it in. kat is not awake. she is peaceful when she is unconscious which is 18 of the 24 hours her day. and tyrus, i would kiss him at midnight if i could reach his mouth. >> [laughing]. >> greg: let's do this instead. >> ♪ ♪ >> greg: introducing the guttos. -- gutties. the trophy is taller than the presenter. no one has ever done this. he are excited about breaking through grounds. biggest hypocrite of the year. gavin newsom. his idea of social distancing is to eat in a restaurant so expensive he will never run into working class people. jamie, hypocrite of the year? >> you crushed it. i will go fauci. it's so much hypocrisy. even the mark thing. get a mask for your mask and then seen at a baseball game for no mask. if not this year arnold noble. he invented the nobel peace prize and went on to invent dynamite. not a lot of peaceful uses. >> greg: good point. tyrus. >> it's a group. cnn. >> [applauding]. >> greg: we need a reason? >> you have not watched the news lately? i don't know. they never keep wowing us. and let's get after it is available. if anyone is looking for a catch phrase that doesn't work. >> greg: we didn't know what let's get after it meant. what was the it. kat, biggest hypocrite. and i am glad you woke up. >> i am not. [laughing]. i think gavin newsom is a good call. it wasn't just him. it was a lot of people. rashida tlaib at the wedding. all of these people making rules for other people and not following themselves. then not really caring or changing their minds. not saying let's change the rules. continuing to do so. >> greg: dana? >> the mayor of chicago and the mayor of d.c. and the mayor of sovereigns -- san francisco in one week at social events. and nancy pelosi went to a big event and every staff member had to wear a mask. i hate going into restaurants where everybody else has to be masked but the people who are actually eating. hopefully that can change in 2022. those three mayors took the cake. >> greg: nicely done with the restaurant. i like the servers wearing masks because then they can't tell you about their screen play. >> on a plane and you have to wear a mask while eating. i buy a 100 pound bag of sun flower seeds. >> greg: the next award. tool of the year? from are so many tools. it's a tie been seth rogue an who claimed his new show tanking on white supremacists. kat? >> it's chris cuomo. anybody who would say let's get after it is a fool. -- tool. he faked his naked on the internet accident. he has his shirt off. he is the biggest tool in the history of the planet. >> [applauding]. >> it's a big night for cnn. brian stellzer. >> jeffrey toobin. >> there you go. >> [cheers and applause]. >> greg: i would ask the audience to give him a hand but he doesn't need it. tools? >> i am mixing it up here. danny carrie. he is the drummer from tool that actually got accused of sexual harassment and yelled homophobic slurs at the tsa. >> greg: their album was good. the most racist event of the year. mine is the classroom teaching critical race theory. tires, the most racist thing of this year? >> cnn again. don lemon. >> [cheers and applause]. -- tyrus. >> we are all white supremacy ists. even me when is exciting. it's nice to know they opened their doors to up. an interesting mixer now. >> greg: even racists need diversity. >> that makes them the hypocrite of the year. >> greg: dana? >> this is a story that stuck with me a lot. when the biden administration accused the border patrol border patrol of being racist because they were doing their job using their horses to prevent migrants from illegally entering the united states. the president said they will pay. there will be an investigation. they dropped the investigation. they are trying to let this go. i don't want to let it go. >> greg: they are counting on the news cycle to erase everything. jamie? >> notice how super racist biden closing the border to south africa. i had a big tour in botswanna. >> [laughing]. >> i was doing last chuckle hut in zimbabwe. here's how to spot a racist. at bed, bath and beyond and you see someone with sheets going into the changing room. >> greg: [laughing]. nice. >> that's how you know. >> greg: kat? >> it's not an event. guys on the internet in their mom's basements typing racist stuff. that's going on all the time. that's all i have to say. >> greg: up next, worst politician. aoc, hard to smash the system at an event with appetiters and justin trudeau. worst politician? >> i will with de blasio. >> greg: you can change it? >> to cnn. my least favorite thing was the vaccine thing where he was eating the hamburger and fries. yes. if you are going to push vaccines you push a health lifestyle. if you get the vaccine you get free co-morbidities. >> greg: gain that weight. >> de blasio you have united new yorkers this being excited about eric adams. takes somebody that bad to get it done. a lot riding on eric adams. hopefully he can turn things around. de blasio doesn't realize how disliked he is. now he wants to run for governor. >> greg: exactly. while the crime was exploding, he was running for president as it was starting. did not stop him. i think eric adams has a great opportunity. it's good to come in after the worst mayor in history. kat, your choice? >> andrew cuomo. he was like killing grandparents and groping women and using taxpayer dollars to make himself rich. it shows maturity on my part i am no longer like a man with nipple rings. >> greg: tyrus? >> lightfoot. hands down. will only speak to brown reporters and told relators you were asking for it. the worst politician in the country. >> greg: i go with bill de blasio because he is the worse human being on the planet. if we have the worst. then we have to give credit to the best politician of the year. president of florida ron desantis. >> [cheers and applause]. >> greg: he's done more for florida than plastic surgery. kat? >> i don't idolize anybody except for adam sandler. that's true. >> greg: i know that. >> they work for all of us. they can keep working. >> greg: tyrus? >> rand paul. >> greg: i had rand paul. >> he stayed the course. he did the job and i respect that. he got beat up by a neighbor and still went to wrong. his consistency is honorable. >> i think it is ron desantis. he bridged the last 2 years. i remember being down in florida for something and an uber driver who said i love our governor. i said i am afraid he will run for president because he won't be our governor. i thought wow. his approval is not just because he is a great politician but good at implementing policy. >> greg: uber driver, it must be nice. >> [laughing]. >> my answers, i go with the same answer. florida knows what they are doing. they came out on the other side of this whole thing. >> [cheers and applause]. >> i was in a uber if florida. we are not social distancing or masking. i believed him because i was sitting on his lap. he goes, here's why i love florida. he said when they opened things up in the first tier. strip clubs opened. you have to get down there. it's a buyers market. >> [laughing]. >> the deals are incredible. i am not a strip club guy. i went there just for research. it was crazy. 5 dollars a dance and for $20 they would take you in the back room and give you covid. >> [laughing]. greg nicely done. coming up more gutty awards. ♪ limu emu and doug.♪ and it's easy to customize your insurance at libertymutual.com so you only pay for what you need. isn't that right limu? 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[a vulture squawks.] there he is. only pay for what you need. ♪liberty, liberty, liberty, liberty♪ this is elodia. she's a recording artist. only pay for what you need. 1 of 10 million people that comcast has connected to affordable internet in the last 10 years. and this is emmanuel, a future recording artist, and one of the millions of students we're connecting throughout the next 10. through projectup, comcast is committing $1 billion so millions more students, past... and present, can continue to get the tools they need to build a future of unlimited possibilities. >> ♪ ♪ >> greg: welcome back to the new year's show for people who hate new year's. more of the gutties. the best hoax? jussie smollett or russian collusion? it's a tough call. jussie smollett wanted to be here but he was tied up. >> it's definitely jussie smollett because it's been several years it's been going on. still saying he did not do it. when there is video evidence of you rehearsing a hoax, you got me. not this guy. he is appealing it. this is the biggest effort put towards a hoax. >> watching "gutfeld!." most actors don't get out of character until dvd comes out. he won't break character until the netflix documentary comes out. >> greg: that's your choice? >> yes, it has to be. >> i love the smollett story. i think the 16-19 project from the "new york times." they win awards and prizes and historians are knocking it down every week. they keep going. >> greg: jamie? >> it is smollett one is so huge. you know it was a hoax. one guy was yell asking like line? the biggest hoax. we put this super old guy in to pretend he is the president. >> greg: my hoax, all of these were good. my choice was the rains were whips. there is no x. there was no crt in schools. there was no police defunding and they show it. you say you see it. there was no crime wave. there was no x is my hoax. inpopulation. -- inflation and peaceful protests. i just did a book outline. next up is the crime of the year? a lot to choose from. the smash and grab, attacks on elderly, the bachelor host getting booted, me not nominated for an emmy. dana the crime of the year? >> well, it comes back to jussie smollett. >> greg: we don't know if he is sentenced yet? >> no, in january. there were others that were stupid crimes. remember in the convenience store the guy talking to his friend. then these goons come in trying to rob him. he just takes it. that was an attempted crime. >> greg: on tape. tyrus, the crime of the year? >> wow, a lot of them. a lot of crimes this year. >> greg: maybe that's the crime of the year on crime. >> you feel like it's just a big day for cnn. >> [laughing]. >> they reported on everything that was not true. they made the fake stories real crimes and the real crimes did not get reported. that's got to be a crime. >> greg: you saw my notes. i wrote denial of crime by cnn. >> the racist is gutfeld. he said i wasn't smart off and i had to look at his notes. what are you a liberal? >> greg: [laughing]. kat. >> we don't know about because it was such a good crime they didn't get caught. >> greg: the rapid tests crime. where is it? we should have had rapid tests like that, rapidly. another fun one. biggest career implosion. it it could be ellen degeneres who was outed as a monster by her employees. her slogan meant be kind to [bleep]. she got so much bad press she wanted to go back into the closest. implosion? >> i will go with a weird one. this is a life implosion. alex rodriguez. he had this aura of being this great dude. cheating on j-law. do you know how hard it is to hit a 90 miles per hour fast ball and not cheat on your wife? pretty hard. >> greg: i just bruised myself. i am like a rotten apple. >> cnn is just killing it. he was going on other people's show just to say i had. it's me. >> i have one. chrissy tiegen. she was involved with everything. >> greg: she was a super bully. could not get forgiveness because everybody remembered. >> smollett again. he could have pled guilty. i did it and get out. instead he tripled down and doesn't know his career imploded. >> tonight thanks to dana perino he will get ought of those awards. >> i don't like how he tried to take down other people like destroy the brothers. >> tyrus is looking at your notes and i looked at tyrus's notes. there were 10 pages and they all said cnn. >> i want to change my racist guy again. >> [laughing]. >> greg: i was going to say cuomo. i will say brian williams because we crushed him in the ratings and he had to retire. i am not dancing on his grave. i am not that cheap -- yes, i am. raft one. under-rated story of the year? i would say the "gutfeld!" show beating all of the late night shows. >> [cheers and applause]. >> under-rated story? hmmm. >> greg: that's a nice sound. >> i don't know. there are too many stories. everybody needs it go home. >> greg: an underrated story. sarah silver man called out joy reid and get engetten -- gettinn alive by the left. >> the election results in virginia and new jersey. the democrats realized that people were voting against them because of school shutdowns and the economy. in particular it was about the mask mandates and small businesses. the big box stores could be open. 2022 will be great for republicans everywhere. because of omicron democrats are over-reacting. they don't realize how bad hal be for them next november. >> the most under-rated story of the years the seth myers show. i took it literally. >> greg: [laughing]. tyrus? >> the crime and the defunding of the police. only one network covered. everyone's was nothing to see here. the real stories that affected this country got no air time. >> greg: that's a great point. coming up our guests pick their favorite stories of the year. welcome to allstate. where auto insurance now costs less. ♪ and savings like that follow you everywhere. ♪ now, save more with allstate. ♪ because better protection costs a whole lot less. you're in good hands with allstate. call a local agent or 1-888-allstate for a quote today. ♪ ♪ 'tis the season to break tradition in a cadillac. don't just put on a light show—be the light show. make your nights anything but silent. and ride in a sleigh that really slays. because in a cadillac, tradition is yours to define. so visit a cadillac showroom, and start celebrating today. ♪ ♪ a must in your medicine cabinet! less sick days! cold coming on? zicam is the #1 cold shortening brand! highly recommend it! zifans love zicam's unique zinc formula. it shortens colds! zicam. zinc that cold! >> greg: welcome back. time to share a memory from our friend who loses hers. kat's pick. remember kamala harris opposition citing rural voters who can't make a copy. >> i don't think that we should under-estimate what that could mean. because in some people's minds that means you are going to have photo copy your i.d. to send it in to prove who you are. people in rural communities, there is no office max. >> greg: according to kamala harris if you don't live in a city where the politician its live you are living in 500 bc when nancy pelosi still had her original neck. who knew that would be a preview of coming attractions. teamed up with nasa and put on an performances with hand picked children for a video on outer space. she came off phoney and the children learned the greatest space is between her ears. kat, what stood out. this happens over and over again. she tries to convince everyone she is a nice person who loves and cares about people. she is a mean person who doesn't like people. simon cowell made a career off i am a mean guy. he is rich. if you go i am a mean person, people go oh, no you are not. because she is pretending to be nice, no, you hate people. i am a mean lady and i don't care. >> greg: i own my meanness and nobody hells -- tells me i am a nice person. i don't live a [bleep]. she is like the tv show veep. >> that's one of my favorite shows. the other day when she plugged in the electric car. oh! i wanted her to do well as first woman vice-president. have something to show that can work. now you have cnn making lists of who could run for president are in the democrats in 2024. they decided it won't be biden or her. >> greg: what do you dislike about her? >> we are listening to biggie and that was cool. [laughing]. it would have been nice if she could have solved their murders when she was the ag. i like the little things she does to let biden know how much she didn't like him. they are standing next to each other at a ceremony and he could not see what she was saying to him. his wife got upset and made her move. she's like remember your lines. biden is what are my lines? that's enough. move. >> greg: jamie? >> i am surprised that people in rural areas were able to see what she said. maybe they heard about it through oral legend. >> greg: that's my favorite legend. >> when you hear that kinkos has been gone forever. you have to xerox your i.d. that's been gone for a [bleep] time. go to borders and get a book and top by radio shock and get a copy machine and go to blockbuster with some dinosaurs. >> [cheers and applause]. >> greg: all right. >> greg: tyrus loved the library story when we told you about how a black "new york times" guest columnist complained white people were showing up at the library in the front yard. what i resented was this little white couple. that library was on my lawn and it game theirs. >> i hate the story. i have to apologize because some black people are just stupid. it's what mcdowell did to ellis. he gave us a heart felt story about he himself had a lovely library in his front yard for all of the children to come by and read books. dagen mcdowell told me any man who has free stuff on their front lawn is a pervert. i was laughing like a little school girl. >> my library at the end of my driveway. >> my father would say only perverts giveaway free stuff in their front yard. >> [laughing]. >> ladies and gentlemen. >> [laughing]. >> greg: that was great. >> [cheering]. >> greg: he took it like a pro. >> no other way to take it. >> greg: that was funny. >> greg: that was funny. we have to move on. i always wanted to know more about my grandfather. he...was a hardworking man who came to new york from puerto rico when he was 17. with ancestry, being able to put the pieces of the puzzle together... ...it's amazing. it's honestly amazing. did you know that more than 90% of poisonings happen at home? 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>> i can't imagine getting out of bed and going to it do something you know is a lie. if you can't think of something true fighting for this candidate then just stay at home. >> their tiki torches are empty. >> that's true. >> bring the oil. >> greg: what a bunch of scum. probably didn't get another job after this. after this. up next how the covid vex go long! oh god, they'll never let us back in here. i'm james corden and i'm here to tell people that ww is getting even more personal. ahh! the new ww personalpoints program is particular to you. you can eat pizza. you can even eat this, if you want to. and these... in the same... i mean, not at the same time, i wouldn't do them at the same time. no two plans are the same. when can i start? start the new year with three months free. join today at ww.com. hurry, offer ends january 3rd. heavy uterine bleeding (hub) and iron deficiency anemia (ida) through the years . oh, i've been there. the sweater. around the waist. heavy period? yeah, makes you wonder what women used to do. the record. as an accessory. i've been there. the backward apron. i've been there. if you've been there, you get it. excessive menstrual bleeding for 6 months or more is known as heavy... ...uterine bleeding. hub may lead to another condition called... ...iron deficiency anemia, which can cause symptoms including tiredness, headache, and weakness. learn about iron deficiency anemia at imayhaveida.com. moving is a handful. including tiredness, headache, and weakness. no kidding! fortunately, xfinity makes moving easy. easy? 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>> i hope so. during the pandemic all i did was stay home. i got to the end of netflix. just watched season 3 of the fireplace. i had the closed captions on. it was like crackle, crackle. people don't know this. if you watch all of the fast and furious movies back-to-back in order and really pay close attention, you are a [bleep] loser. >> [laughing]. >> i like him. >> yeah. he's moving here. can i say that? >> yes. >> greg: we will spend time together. i don't have a hot tub but i will make one. >> do you have a question, greg gutfeld. >> we met when he saws the videos of me at tj max. tyrus you have been in a lot of movies. >> not thanks to this show. i agree with you. that's what i like to do with my kids is go to the movies. the thing with the pandemic the streaming service changed the game. now you don't have to wait 45 minutes for $65 popcorn and all of the things you don't like about the movies. the point is to go and have fun and have a conversation. things change. horse back riding used to be fun but cars came. i hate to say it. not everywhere. >> greg: there are rural areas where they don't have cars. you have to take your horse to the kinkos in the other town. dana, you and i both agreed that the blockbuster of the year was the bond film. you didn't finish watching it? >> no, we paid and only watched the first hour. i got the spoiler. >> greg: at the end. >> i have not been to a movie theatre since 2008. i love the streaming thing. when a movie gets scary i can leave the room. >> greg: you can't go to the movies because you can't keep the seat down. >> that's hilarious coming from a guy that needs help getting out of the seat. >> greg: that was not a joke. >> no, no, it's the end of the year. [bleep]! you sit in the same squishy pillow to make you look taller. when i fill in for you on "the five" i don't need that. >> his is comfort and mine is for height. >> greg: the share sucks. i -- chair sucks. i like going to the movies and talk to the people in line. how are youing? >> i stay home and watch people from my window. i don't like the movies. i don't have kids. >> greg: that doesn't stop me. i don't have kids. i don't know what that meant. suddenly i am applying for a job at cnn. >> oh, god. >> i was going to say that. >> greg: i said which kid is yours? i don't know yet. >> [laughing]. >> greg: that was a perfect one liner. don't go away. we'll be right back. that was great. as a dj, i know all about customization. that's why i love liberty mutual. they customize my car insurance, so i only pay for what i need. how about a throwback? ♪ liberty, liberty, liberty, liberty ♪ only pay for what you need. ♪ liberty, liberty, liberty, liberty ♪ >> greg: we are out of time. happy new year, whatever! all-american new year is next! i'm greg gutfeld, i love you, ♪ [national anthem] ♪ [national anthem] ♪ [national anthem]