Jimmy thank you very much, everybody. [ applause ] i feel the love. I feel the love. [ cheers and applause have a seat, please. Welcome to the tonight show, everybody. Give it up for the roots, right there, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause love you guys. Guys, big news today we finally found out the name of the royal baby. [ cheers and applause yeah Meghan Markle and prince harry have decided to name him Archie Harrison mountbattenwindsor [ light laughter ] even Benedict Cumberbatch is like, wow, thats a mouthful. [ laughter ] a lot of words but its true, the new babys name is archie apparently the royals love the show riverdale so it was either archie or jughead [ laughter ] i think they made a good choice [ applause ] today meghan and harry introduced the baby to the press. Here he is [ audience aws ] Archie Harrison mountbattenwindsor. People did not see that one coming [ laughter ] right now, guys who bet on the name are calling their wives like, honey, the money i lost
Had been altered using a sharpie to include alabama [ laughter ] look at this i mean, after this, i have to wonder if his High School Report Card was legit [ laughter ] following criticism that he opted to stay at a trump property in ireland 200 miles away from his meetings in dublin, Vice President mike pence today changed his story to claim that the travel arrangements were made to keep him close to his familys ancestral homeland which is weird because i thought this was his ancestral homeland. [ laughter ] Vice President mike pence visited iceland today. Said betsy devos, its pronounced island. [ laughter ] the New York Times has published a new profile on democratic president ial hopeful Marianne Williamson in which she says she wants to attack President Trump in his third eye. Yelled trump, not my butthole [ laughter ] [ applause ] thank you for clapping [ laughter ] new york mayor bill de blasio said in a new interview that if he cannot qualify for the october debates it will be,
And magic sprays shell keep the dark psychic forces far away well, i guess youd say what kind of candidate talks this way . Marianne williamson talkin about marianne she knows oprah sung to got to have your loving tune baby, he knows obama got to have barack obama has joe mentioned he knows obama . Yes, hes really tight with obama sung to heard it through the grapevine tune i bet youre wondering if we knew Michael Bennett was running too with some other guy named jay inslee also, whos john delaney . It was a surprise to our eyes to our eyes just who the hell are all these guys . Are these guys . Today, i saw them for the first time and of course, this moving tribute to the host of the debates, cnn. sung to abc tune cnn will these debates ever end . Your coverage i cant commend cnn please stop interrupting them announcer its the late show, live with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, dejabait. Plus, stephen welcomes rahm emanuel. And Michael Ian Black. Featuring live jon batiste and stay human a
Im liz kreutz in San Francisco where animal shelters are asking for help for 96 dogs and horses were found at a Northern California puppy mill. Im Lisa Amin Gulezian where prevention is sponsored by House Speaker nancy pelosi and congresswoman Jackie Speier. Im Amanda Dell Castillo in Mountain View where a disputes between landlord and tenant take a terrifying turn. Its eviction through staged Home Invasion. Abc7 news starts right now. Announcer now news to build a better bay area from abc7. A terrifying Home Invasion with a shocking twist. Mountain view police say it was an attempt by the landlord to evict a family. Abc7 News Reporter Amanda Dell Castillo is live at Police Headquarters with new details on this. Amanda. Reporter dan, ama, police say a rental dispute between a landlord and tenant led to a terrifying staged Home Invasion, and they say the landlord even reached tout her friends to help in the push. In the end, scare tactics led to the arrest of five people. They tried to
Jimmy thank you very much. Welcome, everybody welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome. Welcome to the tonight show. This is it [ cheers and applause youre here. You made it. Thank you very much. You guys, this is fun. Shark week is officially here steve yeah [ cheers ] jimmy and if youre excited about that, youre either a marine biologist or really high [ light laughter ] i read that shark week started back in 1988 yeah its been around for over 30 years even crazier, theyve just been airing the same ten shows and nobodys noticed [ laughter ] get this, every year there are about 80 unprovoked shark attacks. Yeah, 80 unprovoked attacks. Or as President Trump calls that, a weekend. [ laughter ] [ cheers ] actually trump loves shark week. Its the one time he can tweet, i love great whites, without being called a racist. [ audience ohs ] [ laughter and applause steve really jimmy speaking of the president , the other day he invited some reporters in to talk about how he might put a tax on french