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Transcripts For KGO Jimmy Kimmel Live 20240712

Im not complaining about that. But when i told my parents that, they said why . Did the other two guys pass away . My mom told me i was too stiff and that my suit didnt fit. And my dad wanted to know why i didnt mention my Cousins Construction company. Im just so glad to be working again. My days normally start out with the zoom preschool circle time song, the joeys are here today. The joeys are here today. Hip hip hip hooray. The joeys are here today. So glad i missed that song. Next, put sunscreen on my kids. Growing up, i dont even think my parents knew what sunscreen was. My father used to lather me up with olive oil so i could get a beautiful tan at the age of three. Then snack. Then lunch. And when theyre done with lunch then we snack again. Then i take the kids on a walk where somehow, i am the only one walking. Then its nap time, for me. Next, i watch eight minutes of tangled, four minutes of trolls, and 30 minutes of cinderella. Then i negotiate how many bites of dinner equals

Transcripts For KGO Jimmy Kimmel Live 20240712

Hip hip hip hooray. The joeys are here today. So glad i missed that song. Next, put sunscreen on my kids. Growing up, i dont even think my parents knew what sunscreen was. My father used to lather me up with olive oil so i could get a beautiful tan at the age of three. Then snack. Then lunch. And when theyre done with lunch then we snack again. Then i take the kids on a walk where somehow, i am the only one walking. Then its nap time, for me. Next, i watch eight minutes of tangled, four minutes of trolls, and 30 minutes of cinderella. Then i negotiate how many bites of dinner equals a popsicle treat. Then its bath time where i somehow proceed to get more wet than the kids who are inside the bathtub. Next is story time. Then bed time. Then i cry in a corner wondering if i am spending enough time with my kids. I want to set the record straight on something tonight. Quarantine . Was invented by italians. The word quarantine comes from the italian words quaranta giorni, which mean 40 days.

Transcripts For KGO Jimmy Kimmel Live 20240712

Did the other two guys pass away . My mom told me i was too stiff and that my suit didnt fit. And my dad wanted to know why i didnt mention my Cousins Construction company. Im just so glad to be working again. My days normally start out with the zoom preschool circle time song, the joeys are here today. The joeys are here today. Hip hip hip hooray. The joeys are here today. So glad i missed that song. Next, put sunscreen on my kids. Growing up, i dont even think my parents knew what sunscreen was. My father used to lather me up with olive oil so i could get a beautiful tan at the age of three. Then snack. Then lunch. And when theyre done with lunch then we snack again. Then i take the kids on a walk where somehow, i am the only one walking. Then its nap time, for me. Next, i watch eight minutes of tangled, four minutes of trolls, and 30 minutes of cinderella. Then i negotiate how many bites of dinner equals a popsicle treat. Then its bath time where i somehow proceed to get more wet th

Transcripts For KGO Jimmy Kimmel Live 20240712

The joeys are here today. So glad i missed that song. Next, put sunscreen on my kids. Growing up, i dont even think my parents knew what sunscreen was. My father used to lather me up with olive oil so i could get a beautiful tan at the age of three. Then snack. Then lunch. And when theyre done with lunch then we snack again. Then i take the kids on a walk where somehow, i am the only one walking. Then its nap time, for me. Next, i watch eight minutes of tangled, four minutes of trolls, and 30 minutes of cinderella. Then i negotiate how many bites of dinner equals a popsicle treat. Then its bath time where i somehow proceed to get more wet than the kids who are inside the bathtub. Next is story time. Then bed time. Then i cry in a corner wondering if i am spending enough time with my kids. I want to set the record straight on something tonight. Quarantine . Was invented by italians. The word quarantine comes from the italian words quaranta giorni, which mean 40 days. During the plague,

Transcripts For KNTV The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon 20240712

While my wife and dog and kids are safe and cozy on the inside and i hope that you are safe and cozy on the inside of your home its a great day to stay at home we have a fun show tonight Blake Shelton is here, Country Music legend why was i doing that what was i proving by being nothing. I was proving nothing by being outside. Anyway, im inside now and i hope you guys are inside as well, safe. Blake shelton is on the show tonight. Hes doing a song with gwen stefani to close out the show called nobody but you off of his album, fully loaded. He his Charity Tonight is musicares. Theyre doing something for people in the Music Industry affected by covid19 its a Great Charity thank you for being here, blake. Also from saturday night live, you know him, you love him, hes also in Trolls World Tour, Kenan Thompson is here tonight. [ clapping ] we love kenan. And his charity is nokidhungry. Org. And then later well be playing a game, an online game called quiplash, which i love all right, lets s

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