Which is ok i guess. I guess its better than nothing. When i was in high school, i had an isolation prom too. Everyone else went to the prom. I stayed home and played my clarinet. And while we may be isolated, it would seem we are not alone. As if we didnt have enough to worry about right in the middle of this, at the moment we are totally focused on the virus and quarantine and whether or not we should be mainlining lysol, the pentagon releases official video of ufos. Thats right. What you are about to see are ufos. They are unidentified flying objects that no one, not even the pilots who saw and tracked them, has an explanation for. Theres a whole fleet of them. Look on the sa. My gosh theyre all going against the wind. The winds 120 knots west. Look at that thing, thats not that is look at that thing its rotating. Jimmy perfect. Just what we need. Has there ever been a worse time for an alien to say take me to your leader . I think id just lead him to, like, Morgan Freemans house. T
Thats right. What you are about to see are ufos. They are unidentified flying objects that no one, not even the pilots who saw and tracked them, has an explanation for. Theres a whole fleet of them. Look on the sa. My gosh theyre all going against the wind. The winds 120 knots west. Look at that thing, dude thats not that is look at that thing its rotating. Jimmy perfect. Just what we need. Has there ever been a worse time for an alien to say take me to your leader . I think id just lead him to, like, Morgan Freemans house. That video is nuts. Those pilots were pretty casual about it. They reacted about the same way i would react if a squirrel got in my house. Whoa dude the navy calls it unidentified aerial phenomena, which is basically a ufo. Thats what a ufo would put on its tax return. These videos have been circulating unofficially for quite some time. But now they have been certified as bonafide. From the military, which, it seems suspicious to me that the pentagon waits until the
[ cheers and applause jimmy thank you. Hello. Welcome. Hey, looking good. Thank you very much. Everybody welcome. Welcome, welcome welcome to the tonight show. Give it up for the roots right there, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers ] nice to see you, boys. [ cheers ] thank you, sir you guys, theres so much going on right now beyonce just dropped a new album [ cheers and applause and a Netflix Documentary all in the same day. Also, the time 100 list was released the Mueller Report comes out tomorrow, and someone leaked the end to the avengers. [ audience ohs ] theres a lot to go over so, lets just jump in, and ve [ cheers and applas been busy, who else has been busy Robert Mueller hes been working on his report for 22 months. The president was like, thats crazy, thats four years. But you know what else could take 22 months watching every avengers movie. Someone [ cheers and applause well earned months someone just leaked the ending to endgame, and now everyone is freaking out, so please do
Season is under way. If youre a chicken wing, this is your last chance to hide because tonight the defending champion new England Patriots hosted the kansas city chiefs. The patriots, you know, are a heavy favorite to win the super bowl again this year. The heaviest favorite since 2000. And the jets on the other hand, they have the longest odds to win for any team ever. The new york jets are 1,000 to 1 to win the super bowl. [ laughter ] if you want to win 1,000, all you have to do is take 1 and buy a scratchoff ticket. Dont bet on the jets. [ laughter ] of course this is an especially exciting time for fans here in los angeles. This year we have not just one but two teams to let us down. [ laughter ] the rams and the chargers. Its kind of funny. People here in l. A. , have any of you decided which team youre going to root for . Its kind of like the last episode of the bachelor. You narrow it down to two. And then maybe you pick one and five months later its over and youre like, what .
Season is under way. If youre a chicken wing, this is your last chance to hide because tonight the defending champion new England Patriots hosted the kansas city chiefs. The patriots, you know, are a heavy favorite to win the super bowl again this year. The heaviest favorite since 2000. And the jets on the other hand, they have the longest odds to win for any team ever. The new york jets are 1,000 to 1 to win the super bowl. [ laughter ] if you want to win 1,000, all you have to do is take 1 and buy a scratchoff ticket. Dont bet on the jets. [ laughter ] of course this is an especially exciting time for fans here in los angeles. This year we have not just one but two teams to let us down. [ laughter ] the rams and the chargers. Its kind of funny. People here in l. A. , have any of you decided which team youre going to root for . Its kind of like the last episode of the bachelor. You narrow it down to two. And then maybe you pick one and five months later its over and youre like, what .