Well, ronnie, why are you throwing your arms around bonnie sue . Brian is the one whos graduating. Oh yeah, i got mixed up. Brian dont you dare. laughing congratulations anyway. Bonnie sue, you ready to go to lunch . I certainly am. Brian, would you like to go with us . Well, no thank you, ronnie, i think i better stay here. Id kinda like to talk to your mother. Oh, alright, come on bonnie sue. [gracie] uh, ronnie . Did your father like the tie, or are you going dutch . Well, let me put it this way. He liked the tie, but loved my exit. laughing now what is it, brian . Well, i got a real bad problem. You see, i aint gonna graduate at all. Youre not . I thought i was. I studied hard for all the exams. I had me all the right answers, but they didnt ask me the questions to fit em. laughing oh, this is terrible. [brian] it sure is, especially since there he is over at the hotel, hes phoning all his friends on the long distance, and hes bragging to each one for at least a half a hour. There
Now i know why gracie took my breakfast away from me. thanks to my 21inch private eye. laughing great invention. You know what that Little Television said . Im the mata hari of beverly hills. laughing can you imagine what would happen if everybody had a Television Set like mine . They would just sit around, and. No, come to think of it, that would be pretty boring. Every time you tuned in, you would see somebody else sitting in front of his Television Set, watching you watching him. laughing another way to get information is to go to a fortune teller. When i was young, i had my palm read by a gypsy, and when she found out i only had 50 cents, someday youll be very handsome, took the 50 cents, and hollered, next laughing so i said, can you really tell that ill be handsome by just looking at the palm of my hand . She said, what else . I certainly couldnt tell it by looking at your face. laughing and she was right. I got the handsomest palms in show business. laughing matched pair. laughi
And im not spoiled, but i will be if i dont get to go. Mommy, do i get to go . Ah, ah. Dont try to influence the judge. I dont know, dear. But if you dont, well have fun right here. All right, bud, youre next. I think i should get to go to the Football Game because, someday, i intend to play football. And if i dont get to see a big game, how am i gonna learn . Thats a pretty logical reason, i think. Ah, ah. Dont try to influence the judge. Betty . I think i should go to the game because. I adore football. I adore the wholesome sportsmanship of the game. And i adore the handsome, distinguished man who will act as my escort my father. Hmm. Thats pretty good, margaret. She used 26 words cut out handsome. Dont you dare cut out the word and. Mother, do i get to go . Sorry, judge. Children and their father i hereby decide in favor of. Betty. Oh, father oh, mother. Oh, goobers. Now, now. Lets not be bitter. Now, the real reason i chose betty is that shes been such a help to me this last week.
[ applause ] people get very giftconscious on days like this, and i want to thank the lady from the audience who left the longstemmed american beauty in my dressing room. [ laughter ] although your daughter seems like a nice girl, i cant get her on the show. You were ahead of me, werent ya . [ laughter ] by the way, if youre out here as tourists especially today and you [ applause ] welcome. All right. And if youre up on hollywood boulevard and you see a man walking along dressed as cupid, that does not mean its valentines day, thatthat means its murray. He dresses that way every single day. [ laughter ] well, maybe he doesnt. [ laughter ] love is in the air today. Valentines day. And remember, before you fall head over heels on love with someone you just met, remember [ laughter ] [ applause ] i always Wax Nostalgic on valentines day, and ii which i do occasionally. I wax several days, but especially on valentines day. I think of my youth back on the plains of nebraska and my very fir
But we dont do one thing to encourage them. You know, youre right blanche. Now take george. I doubt if hes had dinner by candlelight since electricity came in. Well, i for one am going to do something about it. Well, if you want to do it for one, do it. But im going to include george and do it for two. Its more fun that way. audience laughter now i am going. Gracie, is breakfast ready . Im starved. It certainly is, lover. audience laughter lover, at 8 00 in the morning . She must have said liver. Bacon is delicious for breakfast. Dear, sit here. Candlelight . Well, no dear, but candlelight is so much more romantic. In fact, it almost matches my fiery moods. Hows that . Well thats real nice, but i had my heart set on some fried liver. Oh, george, look at my gown. Doesnt it do something to you . Its beautiful. Oh, well, before i put on my apron, how do you like the back of it . Well, the back and the front would look better if i could see them over a piece of fried liver. Oh, dear. For a