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Transcripts For KYW The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20160607

cheers and applause captioning sponsored by cbs band playing late show theme cheers and applause stephen hey everybody, welcome to the late show, everybody cheers and applause thank you very much yeah Whoo Whoo Whoo cheers and applause hey i dont know. Can ya tell . Can ya tell can ya tell ive had a week off, ladies and gentlemen . Im energized, fully loaded and both tanks are charged, folks, and it is great to be. We were on break for the last ten days, and i hit my target weight which was to gain one pound a day. laughter a little bit of drinking, a little bit of fishing. Dont matter what kind of fish it was because once you deep fry it, cant tell what it is. Speaking of frying, anybody here a fan of burger king . I love the king. Its my favorite foodbased authoritarian government, ever since they stopped making dictatortots. laughter thank you so glad i didnt have to do that by myself, that would have been lonely. laughter and now, burger king is testing a new menu item that combine

Transcripts For KYW The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20160616

And a performance by comedian paul mecurio. Featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now its time for the late show with Stephen Colbert cheers and applause stephen whooo hey, how are you . Hey, everybody hey, up there. Hey, down here welcome to the show nice to see you. Welcome to the late show, everybody. Im Stephen Colbert. That never happened before. The garage door didnt open when i came out here. I guess i didnt have my key card in my pocket. Im not sure. Magnetic or something. Well, folkses, welcome to the show, you can feel a sense of relief in the nation right now. Jon thats right, thats right, you can feel it. Stephen last night, the last primary was held in washington, d. C. cheers and applause the primaries being over reminds me what my brother used to say when i was a kid ah, im going to keep punching you in the face but it will feel so good when its over. laughter jon it never does stephen dont tell mom last night, Hillary Clinton beat Bernie Sanders by 57 points. applau

Transcripts For KYW The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20160615

The scent is. Lets just say, its pungent. Dont open it. Ill light it for and you leave it on your doorstep. Just make a wish before you stomp it out. Tonight, stephen welcomes Daniel Radcliffe. George lopez. And a musical performance by hinds. Featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now its time for the late show with Stephen Colbert captioning sponsored by cbs cheers and applause stephen hey thank you very much thank you, everybody thank you very much. Hey hey hey, up there whats up . Thanks, everybody. Welcome. cheers and applause welcome to the late show, everybody. Thanks so much, ladies and gentlemen. Woman to the late show. I am your host Stephen Colbert. Its a very exciting day, because today, in our nations capital, washington, d. C. , they theld the final president ial primary. We made it we made it through the beginning there are five more months. This was probably the last chance to see Bernie Sanders name on a president ial ballot, and hes going out standing on principle

Transcripts For KYW The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20160617

Demi lovato and nick jonas amy ryan featuring jon batiste and stay human and now, its time for the late show with Stephen Colbert cheers and applause captioning sponsored by cbs stephen thank you, ladies and gentlemen thank you, jon hey cheers and applause you can feel it tonight hey cheers and applause welcome to the late show, everybody thank you so much for being here thank you so much for being here at the late show. Were very excited to have you here this evening you feeling good, jon . You feeling good tonight . Im feeling real good, strong, you know. Stephen excellent. Thats what we need. We need strength today. Jon yes. Stephen big news out to have the president ial election today, but i dont care because i just found out about hidleswift we review all her instagraham pics apparently, it all started when tom and taylor danced at the met gala, which i attended. And i got to take some credit because im the first one to notice that theyre both attractive. And now, pictures have hi

Transcripts For WCAU The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon 20160525

And featuring the legendary roots crew. Questlove 478, macon. Whoo steve and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause ] jimmy come on thats what im talking about. Welcome. Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome. [ cheers and applause ] welcome, everyone, to the tonight show. Thank you so much for being here. You made it. Thank you for showing up. I appreciate that. I love you, jimmy jimmy i love you too, sir. Thank you so much again. Its going to be fun tonight. Get ready. Lets get to some news, heres what people are talking about. This is pretty big. Its been reported that the head of security for the tsa has been officially removed from his position. [ audience ohs ] thats right. He was told to turn in his badge, his uniform, his shoes, his belt, his keys, bottles over four ounces, his laptop, and any coins found in his pocket or keys. [ applause ] lets check in on the president ial election here.

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