The greatest fraud in the history of elections. Theres no way you can go through a mailin vote without massive cheating. The blat ballots are lost, frau, theft, all over the place. China, north korea, iran, these countries can grab those ballots or print forgeries. People get the ballots and hand them to people down the strait. Theyre mailin ballots and they send them to anybody. Two or three were sent to dogs, one sent to a cat. Trevor holy shit, guys, trump is freaking out. People are cheating, cats and dogs getting ballots. If im perfectly honest, i dont mind dogs voting but cats, you cant trust them for shit those assholes will vote for jill stein just to mess with us meow trump stories about kids and Foreign Countries rigging the election sound pretty terrifyin hey, kid, go get ballot from mailbox and i will reward you with delicious russian candy. Its frozen onion. Regardless of how it happens, trumps goal is to stir up fear about fraud, and if you commit fraud, youre going down, unless its tax fraud, and trump will trade tips. But voter fraud, youre going down are theres late incidents of voter fraud sometimes . There are. But of all the states, no evidence to anything close to widespread problems that can affect the election. But and this is a big but that doesnt mean america has no problems with mailin voting at all. In fact the rale danger with mailin voting isnt fraud, its all the Little Things that can get your vote thrown out. There is evidence of widespread rejection of mailin ballots because of human error. In this years primary more than half a billion ballots were thrown out for simple mistakes like signatures not matching the states records, a missing signature, envelope problems and blots arriving after deadline. They have to sign the back of the envelope they mail in. Rather than fill in the bubble and put an x or stray mark, the bloballot is discounted and thrn out. Pennsylvania has two envelopes, the outer and inner one meant to preserve anonymity and protect from damperring. Pennsylvania state court ordering officials to throw out mailin ballots that arrive without both envelopes. 100 votes could be invalidated because of missing privacy envelopes. President trump won in 2016 just by over 144,000 votes. Trevor hundreds of thousands of votes could get thrown out because of minor errors, from a missing signature to a partially filled out bubble. The more i learn about american democracy, the more i think to myself is you guys are invading other countries to give them this . Maybe you guys should figure out this thing before taking it to the global market. I esee why the ballot requirement exists, they were designed to prevent fraud. But a perfectly legal vote could get thrown out. Instead of not getting into your mail account, donald trump gets a second term. There are a lot of Little Things you have to get right for your ballots to count. The other problem is most people just dont like reading instructions. Its the reason most of us cant cook. Cooking is literally just reading instructions and doing what they say. Yet half of us are going rogue in the kitchen like, it says a teaspoon of salt but my hand is basically a teaspoon, right . What do you mean my cookies got thrown out . Those are perfectly valid cookies. Now what are people supposed to eat at the orgy . If you are one of those people who dont make mistakes, kill yourself. Turns out your government might make the mistakes for you. A mailer that was supposed to help district voters confirm their mailin address is spark confusion. The d. C. Board of election sent as many as 500,000 faulty mailers. If you follow the instructions and tear the card along the perforated lines before you mail it, Vital Information will not be included. Roughly 1400 voters in Northern Virginia got do you meant cat absentee ballots. What Election Officials are telling the Washington Post is this was a clerical error. Absentee ballots are arriving in thousands of new york city mailbox bus we are told theres a major problem with the return envelope stuffed inside. Voters tell us they were about to mail it in when they noticed the return address wasnt theirs. Trevor can you imagine that . The vote doesnt down to because the government messed up your ballot. Thats why i have to vote for a better government but you cant because they messed up your ballot. The perfect crime. How come this never happens with the i. Room s. . You never get to not pay your taxes because they messed up your name. Mr. Terver, time to pay your tax. Not my name. We want your money im not surprised this happens with the ballots. This happens with all mail. Think about everything you know about the people who used to live at your address just based on the mail for them that you still get. Like i know the guy who lived here before me used to shop at west elm. I know he went to the university of arkansas and has terrible credit because of all the terrible credit cards i fill out in his name. Thanks for the new tvish dave. Appreciate it. Your blood work came back, oooh mistakes are made with mailin ballots in every election, but this year donald trump is determined to hunt down any mistakes that could get a vote thrown out because he knows democrats are planning to overwhelmingly vote by mail. The vast majority of mailin ballots should be fine, but if you want to be more sure that your vote will count, you should try to vote in person if its safe for you to do so. And if your state offers early voting, thats a good way to avoid crowds and long lines on election day. But if you cant vote in person, and you want to make sure that your mailin ballot is counted, dont worry, the daily social distancing show has got you covered. This year, Many Americans will be voting by mail for the first time. For some young voters, this will be the first time theyve sent any mail at all. So to make sure your ballot is counted, we put together some simple mailin voting dos and donts. Do remember that unless you live in these nine states, you can only get in a mailin ballot after youve applied for one and been approved. Its called consent. Once you get your ballot, do vote as early as possible. In fact, i already filled out my ballot for the 2024 whreks. Good luck on election night, steve buscemi. Do follow all the instructions. Mailin voting is like building a bookshelf from ikea. Skip one thing, the whole thing could collapse and fall on your nephew and everybody stops talking to you. Dont write in a fake address like 69 doggy style lane. Actually, thats pretty good. Im going to use that. Do sign your name before sending your ballot in. That squibble bullshit you do on the credit card machine at cvs, no, your real signature. Dont eat cheetos before you fill it out. Dont use your ballot to writer rot cay. Do remember your state might require a witness to sign your ballot. Dont knock it, sometimes voting can be hotter when someones watching. Do not send in a naked ballot. In the states that require it, make sure to put your ballot inside the secrecy envelope before sending. Also, do not send in a naked photo of yourself. I have been told by numerous Election Officials they are not welcome even if they are extremely sexy. Dont copy asian kids answers. This isnt High School Algebra roy. Aint looking at you. Im waiting for my turn to talk. Really. Yes. Dont hand your ballot to anyone who introduces himself as an official ballot taste tester. He does not work at the post office. Do take a selfie when you mail your ballot in because we all know humble bragging on social media is basically the whole point of voting. Do not keep your ballot as a souvenir. What are you, an idiot . Do give yourself a pat on the back after turning in your ballot. Democracy was in your hands, and you did it. The bare minimum. Well done. Once youve voted, its time to prepare for the post election chaos. Do make sure you have enough wood to build yourself a bunker and do not ~bleep with me at night im ready, ~bleep trevor save space for me, roy we have to take a quick break. When we come back, well try to solve the wildfires happening on the west coast. Then ronny chieng prepares to debate donald trump. Well be right back. First, theyre sour. Then theyre sweet. Sour patch kids. Sour. Sweet. Gone. The unfair money bail system. He, accused of rape. While he, accused of stealing 5. The stanford rapist could afford bail; got out the same day. The Senior Citizen could not; forced to wait in jail nearly a year. Voting yes on prop 25 ends this failed system, replacing it with one based on public safety. Because the size of your wallet shouldnt determine whether or not youre in jail. Vote yes on prop 25 to end money bail. Vote yes on prop 25 burke this . Eh, Nothing Happened. driver Nothing Happened . burke Nothing Happened. driver sure looks like something happened. burke well, youve been with farmers for three years with zero auto claims. driver yeah . burke so you earned your policy perk accident forgiveness. Now instead of this being something, it s driver its nothing burke get a whole lot of something with farmers policy perks. They should really turn this ride off. We are farmers. Bumpadum, bumbumbumbum [cheering] for every nba moment, theres a flavor on doordash. The cumin, the coriander, mix it in with that fresh lime juice theres a flavor on doordash. And that cilantro and it just brings out those flavors. Its very tender. When youre cutting it its tender. When youre eating it its tender. Its bomb steak. Show. Lets talk about wildfires, aka the coronavirus of the forest. As you probably know, the west coast has been devastated by massive fires burning for weeks. Over the weekend, california saw one of its biggest blazes yet. Those deadly new fires are raging out of control in Northern California among the dozens now burning across the state and they exploded in size monday. Those fires destroying homes, popular pine wiernies. Before sunrise, entire neighborhoods were engulfed in flames, devouring an untold number of homes. It was a big red ball of fire right next to us. In napa valley 60 wineries are in the burn zone, an unknown number damaged or destroyed. It covered cars with ash and turned cars red as the smoke blocked the sun. So far california has seen more than 8,000 wildfires destroying more than 7,000 buildings, scorching nearly 5800 square miles. Thats the size of almost 3 million football fields. Trevor goddam that is terrible. So many beautiful wineries are being threatened by these wildfires. Remember, there are a lot of people who rely on these wineries. Youve got the owners, youve got the employees, youve got the economy of entire towns, and you know who i feel really bad for . Americas book clubs because, without wine, theyre going to have to discuss books sober. Thats just english class. Heres my question, though, how come wildfires never burn the shit we want them to. Just once i want to turn on the news and hear about a wildfire burning down a pedophiles house, taking out a knee open nazi recruitment center. Another reason i hope these wineries get out of this thing okay is no because of just how awful it would be for the region but well have to start getting our wine from new jersey. Hmm, i detect hints of adisdas track suit. With yet another wildfire breaking out in california, a record setting year continues to get worse for the west coast. The question many people are asking is why. Why have wildfires gotten so out of control . Is well, lets find out why in another installment of if you dont know, now you know. Trevor so why have wildfires been so bad in recent years . Well, if you immediately said, duh, Climate Change then, okay, youre mostly right. Its a disastrous new normal, catastrophic fires, once contained to one season, now a harrowing yearround battle. A major factor, Climate Change. In the last 40 years, fall temperatures in california have increased about two degrees while precipitation has dropped about 30 . Longer dry seasons and extreme events like heat waves that synchronize the risk of fire across enormous landscapes. Climate changes increasing the area burned by the average wildfire, more than doubling it since the 1980s. Since 1930, five of the biggest fires so far out of the top ten have been this year. California is america fast forward. In other words, a postcard from the future. Trevor man, are you serious . California is basically a postcard from the future . That means the future is also on fire . It also means that the post office is still functioning in the future so i guess, whoo, we did it and that really is mind blowing five of the biggest fires have been this year . Thats insane although, this is 2020, so im kind of shocked that all of the biggest fires havent been from this year. Wildfires might be here to stay, which is awful for humans, but especially bad for trees, because they cant move. Humans can just run away from a wildfire, but trees, theyre just stuck there. Can you imagine how terrifying that must be for them . Aaahhh aaahhh aaahhh now, there are a number of ways Climate Change makes wildfires bigger and more frequent. For instance, not only does drier wood and leaves make better fuel for fires, but hot weather is associated win creasing lightning strikes that ignite them. In fact, even small things about Climate Change can have a huge Ripple Effect that leads to fires, and i mean really small things. Millions of droughtstressed trees in california forests were low on sap which is their natural defense against the bark beetle. These are the little tiny bugs the size of a grain of rice. Bark beetle infestation is linked to global warming. As weather gets warmer, they burrow into bark of pine trees, kill the trees and the pine trees essentially become sticks of kenned ling ready to burn. The beetles took down more than 160 Million Trees and thats where some of the largest fires are burning today. Trevor yeah, believe it or not, the spread of the tiny bark beetle is another way that Climate Change is make wildfires worse. Even though Climate Change is really bad for us humans, for some other creatures, its the best thing that happened. Its like how the Trump Administration has been a disaster for most people but great for various reptiles. I have to be honest, i never thought the apocalypse would be caused by such a lame villain. Beetles are going to be the reason everything is on fire . The last scene of game of thrones was bad enough when she was burning things by dragons. Imagine she had beetles instead lets get back to the kid whos a bird or something. I dont want to watch these beatings. So, yes, we have to address Climate Change. But the truth, is Climate Change isnt the only reason these fires have been getting worse. Theres also at least a century of government stupidity. Controlled fire or prescribed fire is the method of burning certain land to reduce wildfire hazards. This was developed by native americans thousands of years ago. These low intensity fires called cultural burnings have built most of californias forests. Without them, they would become overgrown and unimaginable. As european colonizations was born, state and federal authorities folks edsed on extinguishing any wildfires. The u. S. Forest service said any fires that occur must be put out by 10 00 a. M. The next day. This limit did little to reduce the fuel growing on the forest floor. Even with the policies. California still has fuel loads waited to be burned from centuries ac making it far more expensive than previously thought. Trevor one thing that would help allot is if california had been doing more controlled burns which is basically you burn a little to prevent a lot from burning later. Same way you meet your College Friend for coffee so you dont have to have a threehour dinner with them. Pretty unbelievable that california is now doing what they outlawed the native people from doing. I guess its kind of hard, though, to kick somebody off their land and take their advice at the same time. This is my property now you savage also, before you go, do you have any landscaping tips, like mulching techniques or anything i have to learn . Obviously, its bad enough that wildfires are burning millions and millions of trees. What makes it an especially big problem for people is that we have been giving the fires a lot more of our stuff to burn. Since 1990, 60 of all the homes in the United States have been built in the wild land urban interface. We have houses in places we didnt used to have houses and that puts people and property at risk. As more houses are built near wild lands, more burned. 50 years ago, wildfires destroyed a few hundred structures per year across the United States. Now its more than 3,000. In california alone, more than 6 million houses are in wild areas. Because urban housing is so expensive, instead of avoiding the high risk zones, californians continue to build in a tinderbox of grass and trees boxed by a windy canyon. Instead of a smoky bears in the middle of the woods, we need him in suburbia. Trevor you do yourself a favor and stay out of the suburbs. We dont want karen calling the cops on you. Hello 911, theres a bear in my neighborhood and hes, um, hes brown. And one big problem is more and more people are building homes in the middle of the forest. And lets place the blame where it belongs here, with the keebler elves. Yeah. These guys made living in the forest look to cool everyone started doing it. You get to be many a tree making cookies all day, sounds great, but the cookies are covered with beetles. If were honest here, guys, one of the biggest issues is human arrogance. We think we can build wherever we go. Wherever we build a house, thats our land now. Its the same way people in florida are always surprised when alligators show up. Oh theres an alligator in my backyard no, theres a person in that alligators house. But the good news is we can fix these problems. Yeah, believe it or not, the wildfires dont have to happen the way they have been. We can stop them if we take action to reduce Climate Change. We can stop them if we maintain the forests. And we can stop them if we build in environmentally sensitive ways. As for those beetles you leave them to me. Time for a short break. Dont go away. When we come back, ronny chieng takes us into the world of debating donald trump. Well be right back. Hersheys. The original cookies n creme. the Black Bear School of chess. Speed players. Trash talkers. You wanna come inside my house how about i come in your house and through defeat, he learned. You can beat every bear in the forest, but the game is never finished. Everyone said i was crazy. When i started this commute, but the game is never finished. So fifteen years ago, i got my first subaru and i did it anyway. For more than five hundred thousand miles, my outback always got me there. So when it was time, of course i got a new one. Because my kids still need me. And i need them. vo welcome to the 2020 subaru outback. The most reliable outback ever. Go where love takes you. Show. Joe biden has spent a lot of time preparing for the debate tonight. But how do you prepare for a 90minute conversation with donald trump . Well, our very own ronny chieng talked about it with a debate expert who had a personal experience. Check it out. Its finally debate night. Trump versus biden, the royal ramble. So how is this going to play out . Felipe rinus, former advisor to Hillary Clinton has a few ideas, thats pause he played trump in clintons 2016 debate prep. What qualified you for this . Is it a spiderman situation where you got bit by one of the trumps and was it eric. Someone said you had been practicing for this role your whole life you just didnt know it. I could be tough, not nice, caustic. The point was to let Hillary Clinton get used to this idiot making a lot of noise, some of which is just nonsensical. During the 2016 campaign, people basically said, hey, look, we need to find the biggest dick available to us right now and thats you. Thats me. How did this big dick get deep inside trumps head . The first step was getting into his pants. I went to my tailor and said i need to look like donald trump. He gave me a suit too baggy, the sleeves too long. I bought 3. 75inch lifts in my shoes because hes 66, 67. I didnt wear a big because i didnt want to make a mockery of it. With three inch lifts and overside suit, that was just silly enough . Could i have done as good a job if i was wearing a blue blazer or a onesy . Probably. This was my process. I wanted to it was method acting. It was i wanted be him. You went method to play a president in debate prep . Look at 99cent store daniel day lewis. As ridiculous as it sounds this guy deserves anos car for president del baiting. Its more like a beautiful mind. It wasnt just a matter of studying how to copy him, it was thinking of through what it is he might do. I knew he would be confused and walk andersono stage and not know where to stand. So i did that. And, in the second debate when donald trump started lurking and creeping around hillary, she had experienced it already during our debate prep. Wow, this guy really knows trump. How do you think trump will be different in 2020 debates versus 2016 . Is this going to be a sequel that cant live up to an original, or is trump going to be like the fast and furious movies and just keeps Getting Better and more furious is it . Donald trump was dangerous in 2016 because he had nothing to lose. In 2020, donald trump is dangerous but for the opposite reason. He is a wounded animal. Some animals are inherently mea. If you kick a jackal, hes going to be more of a dick than he is the normal day just Walking Around the tundra or whatever you call, the bush or the have you ever kicked a jackal before . An actual jackal or have i no, i dont think ive ever seen a jackal. I grew up in manhattan so i dont know what people call the wild. If this guy understands trump as much as he doesnt understand nature, maybe he could help the blind campaign. What strategy would biden use to defeat trump in a debate keeping in mind everyones minds are made up and american democracy is broken, but how can biden win . If joe biden is trying to outtrump trump, hes going to lose because we already have a trump. One of joe bidens biggest assets is he does not always sound like a politician. The craziest oldest person ever to be president just told me im crazy and old. Do i just say, i just took a test, have a doctor and am perfectly healthy or do you say, are you kidding me, this guy ~bleep it up, im going to un ~bleep it. So you cant out as trump but everything youre suggesting sounds like trump. So are youio saying you can as trump by being somewhat trumpy but not overtrumping it or are you saying dont be trump at all . Its a very tough balance. I got, be trump but dont be trump. So joe biden for the next debate be like a jackal in the bush or the tundra . Forget it. I hope youre not watching this. Trevor thank you so much for that, ronny. When we come back, ill be talking to the ballerina and superstar Misty Copeland. So stick around. Back to the daily social distancing show. Sorelyier today, i spoke with Misty Copeland, the first black principal dancer at the american ballet theatre. We talked about representation in ballet, her new book for children and a whole lot more. Misty copeland, welcome to the daily social distancing show. Thank you so much for having me. Trevor you are one of the most accomplished ballet dancers in the world. Youre also one to have the most recognizable faces in the world, not just because of how good you are but because of how many boundaries and barriers you broke down in just doing what you do, you know, being the first black lead in swan lake, being the first black principal dancer in a major ballet company. These are huge achievements. Now youve written a picture book that inspires kids to follow in your footsteps. Ive read this book. Arent you setting me up for failure . laughter oh, man. Something i do and carry in everything i do in my life and career is really bring ballet to more people and educate people on what it is. There are so many misconceptions and preconceived notions and tropes that come along with being a blac ballerina in film d television and media that just arent reality. Were not living in the black swan movie. We come into dance to find a way of expressing ourselves, to find happiness, to find beauty and joy. So thats something ive always wanted to high light, the camaraderie, the relationships that develop. So within bundheads, we have a misfit group of diverse characters. There are boys. Theyre all ages and backgrounds. We have myself a young misty, her first day in ballet class. We have catalina, a mexicanamerican girl, who was my best friend growing up. I just wanted to show we can find differences in one another and learn from those differences and grow and support onet another which i think is such a huge part of the ballet community. Trevor yeah, its a really powerful story because so many of the things that you deal with not just in this book but your life really relate to what people have been talking more about, it feels, in 2020, and that is how do we make space more equitable . How do we give people an equal opportunity to succeed. For a long time people would say you can do ballet if you want to, doesnt matter the color of your skin. But you learned early on, it did to you. People said to you your body type is too muscular. We see a lot of narratives. You saw it with the william sisters in tennis. Well, you know, theyre not classic tennis players in the way they look. Its a theme we see over and over again. Once youre in those spaces, what you have done to try to change the ideas that exist in the world of ballet thats seen as a white space . I mean, you just kind of hit it right there. I mean, so much of the language i had to, like, decipher and really understood its code, its this code language thats in the ballet world and so much of the white world has been able to get away with. You know, were in a visual art form thats about your aesthetics, so it seems acceptable to say, im sorry, you just dont have the right body type. What does that mean . Well, i have brown skin. It means the girls standing next to me have just as big muscles and breasts and they are not being told that. So so much of it has been just knowing how to navigate in a way that, you know, is palatable for white people in the ballet world, but thats honest and allows people to really understand the underlying narrative thats been a part of the ballet culture and community from the beginning of time. Trevor youve inspired so many people with your story. You are one to have the few people on the planet that could say prince was inspired whic byu which blows my mind. Prince was an enigma. I met him once and he seemed to know everything about everything. For him, Misty Copeland was a source of inspiration. What do you think it was that connected you and the late great prince . Im so happy you had a chance to meet him, first of all. He was someone who was constantly educating himself. He was so invested and involved in learning about the next generation on what people were doing, whether politics, art, music. It was such an honor to even have an opportunity to share the stage with him and to collaborate and he gave me so much confidence and belief in myself to be able to be a free artist. And especially as a black ballet dancer, we often arent given that freedom. Were told what to do. Were doing steps from hundreds of year old ballets and having the freedom to create and bring ourselves to it. Trevor you have been responding to whats happening in the coronavirus. One of the biggest areas devastated by the coronavirus has been the arse. Sometimes people take it for granted, but, i mean, the arts, you know, its sometimes the fabric of how we live our lives, its the music playing in the background, its the thing we watch to take our minds off how hard life can be. I know that youve got a program where you set out to try and keep, you know, dancers just living during this time. What is the program and why do you feel its so important to keep the world of ballet alive . I know that, in times of crisis like this, people congregate towards art and music. It feels as though its kind of this frivolous thing in times like that, but its not. And, you know, as elite as ballet seems, we are not making a lot of money. Im not going to say we because i have a lot of other projects going on endorsing the deal so im not going to include myself in that category. But as professional dancers, theyre not going to be making the money they should be as professional athletes deserve to be making. So i felt it was my responsibility with the platform and the reach i have to use this time to bring awareness to, you know, what dancers are going through. So i started i cofounded swans for relief with a coworker of mine who is in a company in the philippines in manila. I decided to call on all my ballerina sisters from around the globe and ended up with 32 from professional Top Countries and from 14 Different Countries and we came together and performed one very iconic variation to raise funds and bring awareness to each ballerinas respective covid relief fund. So you can go to go fund me and sponsor relief. Trevor thank you for inspiring us, for the work youre doing and joining us on the show. Thank you so much for having me. Trevor thank you so much for that, misty. As we talked about tonight, the west coast is battling horrific wildfires that are destroying millions of acres of land and displacing thousands of people. Climate change has been a key factor in increasing the risk and extent of these conditions. One organization that has been working to find Practical Solutions for Climate Change and other environmental threats, is the Environmental Defense fund. If you can help them, and would like to join in their cause, please visit the link below, and donate what you can. Until tomorrow stay safe out there, wear a mask, and remember, check your ballot before you wreck your ballot. Now, here it is your moment of zen. Well, i think i bring an aura that people know i know what im doing, i know what is happening, i know where we should be going. I know a lot about helicopters. I know a lot of works, like okeechobee, i know it well. What the hell do i know about it . I dont know anything about it tosh. O tosh. O features videos from the internet and is intended for a mature audience. Enjoy. If this doesnt at least chub you up a little, youre a homophobic racist. Welcome to tosh. O when every die feels like a funeral for society, you dress accordingly. Its the season of mourning