Announcer its a late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, a joe new world plus stephen welcomes Stacey Abrams and Thomas Middleditch, featuring jon batiste and stay homin. And now live on tape from the ed sullivan Theater Office building in new york city, its Stephen Colbert stephen hey, everybody there you go welcome to a late show. Im your host Stephen Colbert. I want to give my wife a glass of champagne. You have been a rock the last couple of weeks. Thanks so much. Ladies and gentlemen, joe biden did it hes our next president im so happy i want to share this moment wit you, my audience, i wish we could all be together in the theater, instead of being stuck in this converted storage room but thats not going to stop me from firing the tshirt cannon come on chris, catch this. Come on, catch it okay, jimmy, thats enough. Ill fire that thing back up. Ready at a moments notice. Every time someone growns at one of my jokes, it is go time bleep . Hear that . That means its working. There yo
Plus stephen welcomes Stacey Abrams and Thomas Middleditch, featuring jon batiste and stay homin. And now live on tape from the ed sullivan Theater Office building in new york city, its Stephen Colbert stephen hey, everybody there you go welcome to a late show. Im your host Stephen Colbert. I want to give my wife a glass of champagne. You have been a rock the last couple of weeks. Thanks so much. Ladies and gentlemen, joe biden did it hes our next president im so happy i want to share this moment with you, my audience, i wish we could all be together in the theater, instead of being stuck in this converted storage room but thats not going to stop me from firing the tshirt cannon come on chris, catch this. Come on, catch it okay, jimmy, thats enough. Ill fire that thing back up. Ready at a moments notice. Every time someone groans at one of my jokes, it is go time bleep . Hear that . That means its working. There you go. Finally, after four years, americans can exhale. Unless youre near
And i appreciate all the comments, good or bad. Call me out if you have to im listening. I want to change i want to learn. I want to be helpful wash your hands. Dont touch your face. Stay safe, everybody thank you. Seth hi, everyone. We were on hiatus last week. And i want to start tonight by saying how happy and lucky i feel to be back with you, as well as how upset i am by this incredibly sad moment of American History were all living through many events brought us here, but the focus is the brutal killing of george floyd, a black man at the hands of a minnesota policeman. As a white man, i cant speak of the deeprooted and justified fear africanamericans have when encountered by police, so here is late night amber ruffin let me te y story so, once when i was a teenager, i was brandnew to driving and i dropped my friend off at work and im coming back home and im in morning rush hour traffic and everybody is going over the speed limit. I think its like 40, and everyone is going 50 and
Welcome. Thank you. Thanks, everybody. Hi, im jimmy. I am the host of the show. Thank you for watching. Thank you for coming. Im glad you made it. You made it, right . How many of you are visiting from out of the country . From far away, a foreign land . Okay, quite a few quiet handraisers here in our audience. [ laughter ] well, you got here just in time because this morning the faa had to ground every flight leaving the united states. Basically, the faa fed everyone in the a, eh . [ laughter ] their system went down, resulting in an awful morning for travelers, and a great one for southwest airlines. [ laughter ] they were like, wasnt our fault this time. More than 8,000 flights were delayed, another 1,200 were canceled. After the outage, senator ted cruz released a furious statement calling the situation unacceptable and, of course, blaming the biden administration. [ laughter ] ted has a bug up his butt because the outage made him unable to flee to cancun. As he does every winter.
with eyebrows took a girls shopping trip to taiwan. china s sent scores of planes t the taiwan strait and fired liv missiles near the island. to be fair they weren t her committee she said she didn t hear them because she forgot to charge the batteries in her miracle ear. u.s. military brass responded immediately mobilizing troops for an emergency pronouns workshop. so china fired a load of missiles, activated 100 planes including fighter jets and bombers and ten warships, don t they know how bad all of that i for the environment? how is the media handling this? imagine a country this is a warning telling you what you re about to do crosses the line an yet you do it anyway. it s like when my wife tells me to stop leaving my shoes and flocks on the floor and the recut those full house. china says don t go to taiwan, but screw you china, we are coming over. which are the secret service nicknames for biden and harris. so like a divorce lawyer, you drive up tensions between adver