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Transcripts For KPIX The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20240712

Have been accumulating enormous amounts of cotton balls, tongue depressors, even our urine just what do they need all that urine for . And dont bother trying to find a newborn baby, theyre all in hospitals hospitals if theyre so great, then why is everyone there sick . Announcer its the late show with Stephen Colbert tonight, stephen at home plus, stephen welcomes john oliver with jon batiste and stay homein. Now, live on tape from a safe distance, its Stephen Colbert stephen thank you. Thank you so much. Wow. Wow. Hi. Hi. Please please, have a seat. Thank you. We got to do the show. Im sorry. Thank you very much. Thank buddy. Welcome, one and all, to a late show. Im your host Stephen Colbert. Its good to be back. What have i missed . Anything big . Im coming to you from the late shows new temporary set the historic e ....

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Transcripts For KPIX The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20240712

Announcer its the laten. C. Plus stephen welcomes live, former National Security advisor and ambassador, susan rice and musical guest sheryl crow, featuring live jon batiste and stay homin. And now live from the ed sullivan Theater Office building in new york city, its Stephen Colbert stephen whoo welcome one and all to a late show. Im your host Stephen Colbert. Were live. I dont really know how because we generally do these covid shows with, like, bailing wire and duct tape to begin with, and i just want to give a shout out to my writers, the whole staff, the crew, for everybody making this. I dont know how. Chris, is it actually happening or are you humoring me . Its actually happening. Stephen its actually happening. It is night one of the
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Transcripts For KPIX The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20240712

Bark. One more thing does it remind you of something . Reminds you of this, right . With Stephen Colbert tonight, social distancing, plus stephen welcomes trevor noah, and musical guests willie, lukas and micah nelson, featuring jon batiste and stay homin. And now live on tape from a safe distance, its Stephen Colbert stephen hey, everybody. Welcome to a late show. I am still your host Stephen Colbert. My crew is still one of my children. Tonight it is my son john. Hello, john. Havebe ltht. Youre not micd. Hello stephen there you go. John is doing his homework right now. Hes in high school about to graduate. What homework are you doing now . Im reading beloved by toni morrison. Stephen beloved by toni morrison. Is it funny . I dont know. It could be a kneeslapper. Im ignorant. How many pages are on . Um, page four. St ....

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Transcripts For KPIX The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20240712

And i love it will go away like things go away. Announcer its a late show, live with Stephen Colbert. Tonight trumpsters. Steve welcomes governor Chris Christie and musical guest gregory porter, featuring live jon batiste and stay homin, and now live from the ed sullivan Theater Office building in new york city, its Stephen Colbert stephen welcome one and all. Monsieur and madame, mr. And mrs. America, all the ships at sea to a late show. Im still your host Stephen Colbert, and im coming to you live after the final night to have the Republican National convention. And i dont know whats going on, but ive got chills, ive got nausea. Its either the on ....

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Transcripts For KPIX The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20240712

It will go away like things go away announcer its a late show, live with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, trumpsters. Steve welcomes governor Chris Christie and musical guest gregory porter, featuring live jon batiste and stay homin, and now live from the ed sullivan Theater Office building in new york city, its Stephen Colbert stephen welcome one and all. Monsieur and madame, mr. And mrs. America, and all the ships at sea to a late show. Im still your host Stephen Colbert, and im coming to you live after the final night of the Republican National convention. And i dont know whats going on, but ive got chills, ive got nausea. Its either the onset of covid ....

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