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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Trevor Noah 20240713

Think of a number. Im thinking to have the same one. laughter all right, the South Carolina democratic president ial debate has just wrapped up and, guys, it was a little crazy. Tom, i think she was talking about my plan, not yours. I think we were talking about math and it doesnt take two hours to do the math. Lets talk about math. You wrote the crime bill. Where we come from thats called johnny come lately. You didnt write that bill. I wrote the bill. Okay, you did. Took out to have the hands of look at a fact check. Ets look at the fact check. talking at the same time senator sanders, a quick response. Im not out of time he spoke overtime and im going to talk trevor damn it was wild tonight. I havent seen white people go at each other that hard since khakis were on sale at banana republic. Its not surprising the debate got that hot because the stakes could not be higher, people. This debate is the last one before the South Carolina primary this weekend and, remember, a few days afte

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Trevor Noah 20240713

Edmund, what are you doing in town again . When the murrays go to work. Michelangelo goes to work, too. Good thing they use new gain ultra flings with two times the oxi boost, and febreze. Fresh again. Whacome on coach. It aint breakfast cut to the yeeaaah its time to get more out of breakfast. Pick 2 mcdonalds morning faves right now for just 4 bucks at breakfast time. Wake up breakfast. Introducing poptarts® pretzel. The sweet and salty combo you didnt know you wanted. Theyre also filled with delicious cinnamony sugar its a pretzel but better, because its from poptarts® theyre also filled with delicious cinnamony sugar oh, uh. I am. Just here to. Hes getting his taint bleached. And styled. The rim of his asshole, its a different color. And he didnt wanna tell anybody, especially his parents because its embarrassing. So. wally wow. Dont tell them, okay, because, you know, this is between us and his taint. Of course. Well, we support that, edmund. Thank you very much. Im just getting

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Trevor Noah 20240713

Thing were completely live people, i can prove that were live. Think of a number. Im thinking to have the same one. laughter all right, the South Carolina democratic president ial debate has just wrapped up and, guys, it was a little crazy. Tom, i think she was talking about my plan, not yours. I think we were talking about math and it doesnt take two hours to do the math. Lets talk about math. You wrote the crime bill. Where we come from thats called johnny come lately. You didnt write that bill. I wrote the bill. Okay, you did. Took out to have the hands of look at a fact check. Ets look at the fact check. talking at the same time senator sanders, a quick response. Im not out of time he spoke overtime and im going to talk trevor damn it was wild tonight. I havent seen white people go at each other that hard since khakis were on sale at banana republic. Its not surprising the debate got that hot because the stakes could not be higher, people. This debate is the last one before the Sou

Transcripts For MSNBCW Deadline White House 20180119

Country could use a good shutdown. This is one of those deals where the president doesnt want to shut down, republicans dont want to shut down. The house passed a bill to prevent a shutdown, and its solely up to Senate Democrats led by senator schumer who used to call this governmental chaos. I think if i had to say what the main hold up in all of this is the lack of willingness on the part of republicans in congress to support a domestic agenda increase as they support a military increase. And the president himself piling on this morning with an attack on democrats, tweeting, quote, government funding bill passed last night in the house of representatives now democrats are needed if it is to pass in the senate. But they want illegal immigration and weak borders. Shutdown coming . We need more republicans in 2018. Joining us for the latest on where things stand, jeff bennett is with us from the white house, and eric is with us from capitol hill. At the table the New York Times politica

Transcripts For MSNBC Morning Joe 20100928

that s what they laughed at in the room. see, it s funny because it s sad. pretty good. it s true, though. it is. good morning, everybody. 6:00 on the east coast. welcome to morning joe. mike barnicle is here and he s already made some trouble. i ve been here 30 seconds. i m trying to have a calming effect. no. just stop. also, we have with us, thank god, publisher and owner of the daily news. mort zuckerman, great to have you here. a good show today. looking great. a handsome boy, isn t he? great. strapping. did i miss something? no. big show today. colin powell will be with us, and alma powell will be with us at the 8:00 hour. general powell and his wife, alma. part of education nation. they will talk about something specifically near and dear to their hearts an organization they have been working on for years and a goal in life to make a difference. what s so funny? it s been a great week. i m happy. glad to see you happy. willie. no,

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