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Transcripts For KNTV Late Night With Seth Meyers 20240713

Cmon, lets freaky friday quarantine i sort of picked up from social this thing. Media that youre watching old ahhh, no. Television shows yeah, im well, im senator Elizabeth Warren said catching up on real housewives yesterday she would be former of new york. Im starting with season 1, Vice President joe bidens which took place in 2008 running mate if he asked and im currently in season 3, while senator Amy Klobuchar said shed be his running mate even if he didnt which is i believe were in late President Trump held an event at 2009 the white house today seth gotcha. Celebrating truckers you know me im an orange and he was pretty disappointed county Beverly Hills guy they didnt bring that lady from seth what was ....

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Transcripts For KNTV The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon 20240713

Tonight, join jimmy and his guests Nick Offerman, Charli Damelio, musical guest haim and featurinthe legendary roots crew questlove 1222 steve and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause [ cheers and applause jimmy thank you very much, everybody. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much. And welcome, welcome, welcome to the tonight show. Youre here. [ cheers and applause nice to see you. Well, guys, everyone is still talking about the coronavirus. And i gotta be honest, things are getting a little crazy out there. Today in central park, i saw a a squirrel rubbing purell on his nuts [ laughter ] steve wow. Jimmy the coronavirus doesnt seem like its slowing down, and now the governor of new jersey has declared a state of emergency its serious, the last time this happened was when they ran out of pinky rings at a soprano convention [ laughter ] seriously, there hasnt b ....

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Transcripts For KGO Jimmy Kimmel Live 20240713

Day. More than 17 million americans were expected to call in sick to work today. Which i get it. I overdid it too. I had so much to eat and drink yesterday, i started to hallucinate. I woke up on my couch, i dont know what time it was, but i woke up and i imagined i saw lil wayne dressed as a robot. Weird, right . Anyway. [ cheers and applause ] i will say this. The best part of the super bowl for me this year was knowing that matt damon spent the day sobbing into his tom brady [ laughter ] it was a good game, a fun game to watch. The Kansas City Chiefs as you know came back from a tenpoint deficit in the Fourth Quarter to beat the 49ers and win their first title in 50 years, which to put that in perspective the last time the chiefs won the super bowl the jackson 5 had their first number one hit. True. Marcus welby was the most popular show on tv. And
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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Trevor Noah 20240713

Also on tonights show, Mike Bloomberg is up against the wall. Roy wood jr. Takes us to the chitlin circuit, and why your airplane seat could get you punched. So lets catch up on todays headlines. Lets kick it off with Climate Change. Antarctica is currently seeing recordbreaking warm weather, but if youre thinking about going there for a picnic, you better be careful about where you sit. Reporter a massive iceberg about three times the size of the city of paris has broken off a glacier in antarctica. Satellite images show the iceberg breaking away from the pine Island Glacier in recent days. It comes as temperatures on the antarctica peninsula spike to 65 degrees fahrenheit. Scientists also captured this moment when a glacier recently collapsed in the very same region. Take a look at that. Trevor wow. Giant chunks of ant ....

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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Trevor Noah 20240713

To not be what you were in the past. This is a new place. Ready for the next decade. Updated, revitalized, and ready to fit in with the most progressive towns in america. This is south park. Welcome home. Are the mexicans actually staying . Shh from comedy centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with trevor noah. cheers and applause trevor welcome to the daily show, everybody. Thank you so much for tuning in. Thank you for coming out. Thank you so much for being here. Lets do this thing. Im trevor noah. Our guest tonight is an actor and comedian whose new movie is called olympic dreams. Nick kroll is joining us on the show, everyone cheers and applause also on tonights show, Mike Bloomberg is up against the wall. Roy wood jr. Takes us to the chitlin circuit, and why your airplane seat could get you punched. So lets catch up on todays headlines. Lets kick it off with
New York , United States , France General , City Of , United Kingdom , Duke Ellington , Don Robey , Chris Rock , Wendi Williams , Alexi Pappas , Mike Bloomberg , Fargo Ferguson , Aretha Franklin , Nick Kroll , Trevor Noah , Roy Wood Jr , World News , Daily Show , Pine Island , Island Glacier , Wander Around , First Time , Mona Lisa , Third Time , Big Size , Climate Change ,