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Here at the United Nations [ light laughter ] i mean, wow, just look at all of the room full of diverse cuures and ethnicities seriously, its like the scariest College Brochure ive ever seen. [ laughter ] but i know what youre all thinking its so great to be here with me for the last four to six hours of my presidency [ laughter ] who knew you make one phone call blackmailing a foreign leader and everyone acts like you made one phone call blackmailing a foreign leader [ laughter ] [ applause ] i guess its like the old saying collude once, shame on you collude twice, why not collude a third time [ laughter ] but now it looks like my whistles been blown and not in the good way. [ laughter ] it was a lowdown blowdown. And now ill have to face off against americas least fun grandma, nancy pelosi. Thats right nancys gone totally ukraine in the membrane [ laughter ] but luckily she has no evidence against me only calls, and transcripts, and the fist bump i just gave the ukrainian president o

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