clearing their noses on the court. were they encouraged to do that before this? players will be required to shower in their hotel rooms instead of the locker room. that s i mean, i don t think it s even worth playing basketball if you can t cap it off by scrubbing up with the team loofa! and also, no one will be allowed to touch the ball. so that sounds doable! meanwhile, our basketball-head president is about to go back on the road, but first he is fending off another round of tell-all books. trump is said to be planning to file a lawsuit against his niece, mary trump, over a forthcoming memoir that reportedly does not paint uncle donny in a positive light. this is the book. it s called too much and never enough: how my family created the world s most dangerous man. which is a lot longer than the original title, which was my uncle is a dick. trump claims his niece s book would violate the terms of a non-disclosure agreement he had her sign in 2001. imagine having an nd
are we using ketchup the right way? you re supposed to put it on your face, right? this is an interesting sign of the times. a small show of progress, perhaps. johnson and johnson announced via instagram their plan to help heal our nation s wounds. a line of racially inclusive band-aids. the johnsons wrote, we hear you. we see you. we re listening to you. we stand in solidarity with our black colleagues, collaborators, and community in the fight against racism, violence, and injustice. they re literally putting a band-aid on the problem of racism. but good for band-aids for finally opening things up beyond the shade they ve been using for 100 years. a color known internally as ed sheeran s neck. meanwhile, ford, the motor company, not the harrison, is planning to unveil a new bronco on july 9th, which is exciting, but also surprising because july 9th happens to be o.j. s birthday. for real. ford says they didn t realize this when they announced it. what i want to know is,
what else are we doing wrong? are we using ketchup the right way? maybe you re supposed to put it on your face? this is an interesting sign of the times. a small show of progress, perhaps. johnson and johnson announced via instagram their plan to help heal our nation s wounds. a line of racially inclusive band-aids. the johnsons wrote, we hear you. we see you. we re listening to you. we stand in solidarity with our black colleagues, collaborators and community in the fight against racism, violence and injustice. they re literally putting a band-aid on the problem. but good for band-aids for finally opening things up beyond the shade they ve been using for a hundred years. a color known internally as ed sheeran s neck. meanwhile ford, the motor company, not the harrison, is planning to unveil a new bronco on july 9th, which is exciting, but also surprising because july 9th happens to be o.j. s birthday. for real. ford says they didn t realize that when they announced it. w
band-aid on the problem. but good for band-aids for finally opening things up beyond the shade they ve been using for a hundred years. a color known internally as ed sheeran s neck. meanwhile ford, the motor company, not the harrison, is planning to unveil a new bronco on july 9th, which is exciting, but also surprising because july 9th happens to be o.j. s birthday. for real. ford says they didn t realize that when they announced it. what i want to know is, who did realize that? who looked that up? though, who thought, how is it possible we don t know how to purell, but we do know this? speaking of notorious dates, five years ago today, donald mp has been slowly descending into madness ever since. five years ago today, donald trump rode down that escalator to address a group of actors he paid $50 a piece to cheer for him. look it up, it happened. and now, here we are. you know, the traditional five-year anniversary gift is wood. so later tonight, i m going to hit myself ov
ever again. donald trump had quite a weekend. he put on a bigly presentation at west point on saturday, where he showed up to give a commencement speech whether the graduates wanted it or not. the cadets at west point were sent home in march because of the virus. for safety reasons. but then trump decided he wanted to give a speech in person and so all the cadets were ordered to return to campus and stay in quarantine for two weeks. they were literally a captive audience. so our commander in beef could pretend he s in charge of the military. and of course some of the cadets wound up testing positive for the virus, but what is most important is that donald trump had an audience for what turned out to be a historic speech. no president in the history of this country has ever taken a weirder drink of water than this. [ applause ] is that one of the side effects of hydroxy? what is up with his hand? did he hurt it holding the bible upside-down? let s look at that again. because t