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Transcripts For COM The Nightly Show With Larry Wilmore 20160518

Larry Larry Larry Larry gl thanks gays. We have a great show for you tonight. Guys, lewis black on the show. Let me just say, while many in the medical community were content to stop at hearttransplants laughter some with more vision said hey, cant we do this with dicks . We got word today of a remarkable transplant surgery in boston, the first of its kind in this country. A man who lost his penis to cancer has received a new one. Larry wow oh, man yes can you imagine that, you guys . Receiving the gift of a brand new penis . Well, our studio audience doesnt have to imagine anymore, if you check under your seats right now, youll find no, no, no, im kidding. Some people looked, though. Thanks for the dick, larry. I appreciate it. I know this sounds like a funny story, but its actually an important breakthrough that could help people who really need it. Its a major development, especially for veterans whove suffered genital injuries. There are over 1,300 Wounded Warriors who have these k

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20141031

Captions by vitac www. Vitac. Com from austin, texas, the state whose governor thinks putting on glasses makes you smarter, its the daily shows coverage of democalypse2014. South by southwest, a lethal injection of democracy. cheers and applause jon thank you very much welcome to the daily show. My name is jon stewart. Our final show here in austin, texas. Weve had an incredible time. Were going to finish off big. Hometown favorite band, spoon. cheers and applause so weve been down here since last weekend, making shows during the day, going out at night. Running a texmex mustacheery. laughter i know those are a dime a dozen around here. laughter i have to tell you, this town is blowing my mind. I walked to work today. cheers and applause you know what people did to me as i was on my way here this morning . They smiled. laughter and they said, good morning. laughter and, by the way, not just to me, but to, like, everybody on the street. laughter and i guess my thought was, what the blee

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20130125

Maybe i could make noise they could benefit from, so the next time im having sex, im like, uhhh, tomorrows forecast mostly sunny, 60 chance of rain bring an umbrella [ cheers and applause ] so the next time i see the neighbor in the hallway, shes got an umbrella, im like, ha ha youre welcome hey, guys, my name is eliot chang. Thank you so much. You were just awesome. God bless you. I love you all. Thank you so much. See you soon. [ cheers and applause ] captions by vitac www. Vitac. Com captioning sponsored by Comedy Central from Comedy Centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart. [daily show theme song playing] [cheers and applause] jon welcome to the daily show. Any name is jon stewart. Our guest tonight, the one and only christopher walken. Christopher walken will be joining us in a little bit. Were excited about that let me get to this right now. [cheers and applause] yesterday was a big day on capitol hill. Secretary of state Hillary Clint

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