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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20240622

last night, 14 candidates appeared to see who would be chosen as their party s presidential nominee. that was different from a collection of indistinguishable individual undergoing a much more skill-based shrek. do we have anything from the forum? the two-hour forum played out like political speed date, 14 republican candidates sharing a single stage in new hampshire. jon: a single stage! the worst dinner production of cats ever! looked like this. senator ted cruz attended via satellite. what was so important he couldn t attend in person? in texas, we cook bacon a little differently than most folks. (gunfire) (laughter) jon: are we sure that s grease? perhaps some ejaculate from how much you love guns? by the way, you really need to add bacon to get americans to like guns? for god s sake, it s not salad or medicine. americans use guns for a lot of things coring apples, unclogging toilets, ear pierci piercing ah. listen, gitter done! i shouldn t complain about th

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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20240622

last night, 14 candidates appeared to see who would be chosen as their party s presidential nominee. that was different from a collection of indistinguishable individual undergoing a much more skill-based shrek. do we have anything from the forum? the two-hour forum played out like political speed date, 14 republican candidates sharing a single stage in new hampshire. jon: a single stage! the worst dinner production of cats ever! looked like this. senator ted cruz attended via satellite. what was so important he couldn t attend in person? in texas, we cook bacon a little differently than most folks. (gunfire) (laughter) jon: are we sure that s grease? perhaps some ejaculate from how much you love guns? by the way, you really need to add bacon to get americans to like guns? for god s sake, it s not salad or medicine. americans use guns for a lot of things coring apples, unclogging toilets, ear pierci piercing ah. listen, gitter done! i shouldn t complain about th

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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20240622

leary! (cheers and applause) stop, stop, stop! the road to the 2016 election continues to wind its slow torturous way. last night, 14 candidates appeared to see who would be chosen as their party s presidential nominee. that was different from a collection of indistinguishable individual undergoing a much more skill-based shrek. do we have anything from the forum? the two-hour forum played out like political speed date, 14 republican candidates sharing a single stage in new hampshire. jon: a single stage! the worst dinner production of cats ever! looked like this. senator ted cruz attended via satellite. what was so important he couldn t attend in person? in texas, we cook bacon a little differently than most folks. (gunfire) (laughter) jon: are we sure that s grease? perhaps some ejaculate from how much you love guns? by the way, you really need to add bacon to get americans to like guns? for god s sake, it s not salad or medicine. americans use guns for a lot of t

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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20240622

(cheers and applause) jon: from the daily show, my name is jon stewart! we re going to have a guest tonight, his name is denis leary! (cheers and applause) stop, stop, stop! the road to the 2016 election continues to wind its slow torturous way. last night, 14 candidates appeared to see who would be chosen as their party s presidential nominee. that was different from a collection of indistinguishable individual undergoing a much more skill-based shrek. do we have anything from the forum? the two-hour forum played out like political speed date, 14 republican candidates sharing a single stage in new hampshire. jon: a single stage! the worst dinner production of cats ever! looked like this. senator ted cruz attended via satellite. what was so important he couldn t attend in person? in texas, we cook bacon a little differently than most folks. (gunfire) (laughter) jon: are we sure that s grease? perhaps some ejaculate from how much you love guns? by the way, you

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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20240622

joe biden s gaffes is he says things from his heart and i think that s an attractive quality in the current atmosphere. he s authentic natural. despite his gaffes and maybe even partly because of his gaffes because he can be very charming and relatable. jon: really? so the reason loose lips mcgee (bleep) up his 2008 presidential run is now the reason me s a viable candidate? you know not just blurting (bleep) out, that s a pre-trump presidential quality. post-trump is all about saying the crazy. clearly, hillary sheryl going to have to do something to address the deficit if she went wants to fend off joe authenticity. to soften her image hillary released her campaign ads overnight featuring her mother. jon: that s smart. bringing some humanity to her. can we see? i m hillary clinton i m just like you and other humans. i have a mother who s also a human female like me. as a fetus, i jess tatted in her uterus the way human offspring do. then i traveled through her c

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