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Ive got nothing but love for the workers. They are putting their lives on the line so we can buy mints to not smell our own mask mouth. But its the shoppers that bother me. They dont understand that we need to treat a trip to the Grocery Store like a bank heist. Get in, get out. There is no time to ask the butcher is this lamb chop from new zealand or montana. Lady, its lamb. Youre lucky the delivery guy doesnt have the virus. And dont bother checking expiration dates. It aint gonna kill you. You know what is, the guy sneezing on the plums and this one guy had a face shield mask down to his nipples. How much spit is coming out of your mouth this guy needed windshield wipers on the inside i go to check out. They got a hockey glass between me and the cashier now. No one can hear anything. Thats all i hear is. [ muffled ] the other place people are exhibiting unacceptable behavior right now is on zoom meetings. This is where you use t ....
This happened. No no no the day after i taped that, i decided that instead of going back to my place in new york, id go to my parents house in st. Louis where i could stay for a week or two until this whole corona thing blew over. Heres footage of my reaction when i realized viruses dont blow over. No no no its honestly not been so bad being stuck living in st. Louis with a couple in their 60s it could be worse, at least its not these two. My mom would never wear horizontal stripes. I gotta say though, not much has changed since the last time i lived at home. I still sleep late, my room is a mess, i steal their weed. The main difference is now if im going to my room to masturbate, i say mom, dad, im going to my room to masturbate. I cant watch any more down to earth with zac efron with you guys. Ol glaz dogs gonna finish this ep alone. As grateful as i am to have this time to get reacquainted with both my parents and the zack morris poster over my bed, im not pretending that any of thi ....
Yesterday and tweeted the quote, many people say that its patriotic to wear a face mask when you cant socially distance. Oh, thats why you finally put one on or is it because many people are saying theyre gonna vote for joe biden . Also, love the artsy black and white, man are we supposed to look at that and think, well, clearly hes been wearing a mask since the 1960s how many people do you think you can fool with this kind of stunt . Well, okay, well its actually quite a lot of People Democratic congressional leaders sent a letter to the fbi recently, warning that congress is being targeted by a foreign interference campaign to disrupt novembers election. No, were not said the coffeemaker. President trump tweeted today about his fox news interview with anchor Chris Wallace and said they may have, quote, set a record for doing such an interview in the heat. It was 100 degre ....
But i do think this looks better than some of the other shows. I think we can agree that the worst part of the pandemic is that every late night talk show looks like a single dads first youtube video. But im excited to be back hosting tonight. Apparently i was number one in the ratings last night. So from now on you can call me ncis los angeles. Lets take a look at the news. Hollywood is under a lot of pressure to get back to work. But as governor gavin newsom said today, even with covid rates spiking all over california, its all worth it if we can achieve herd immunity among the cast of barry. Now as you may have heard, Donald Trumps niece mary trump is releasing a tellall book about the president which is already selling well. And she Just Announced shes working on a series of childrens books about the president , including horton withdraws from w. H. O. The taking tree. Clo ....
Owner always at home in the same clothes. And then, like clockwork, even though i dont know how clocks work, the same terrifying sky fire. Honey, did you hear about these new geico savings . Is there no way to distract mom . Myself from this endless loop of youll get an extra 15 sky fire and sweat pants . On top of what geico could already save you. Can i call you back . Your fathers been researching our geneology. I got it were vikings theres never been a better time to save with geico. Oh, yeah, theyre definitely switch by october seventh for an extra 15 not allowed to be up on that bed. Announcer its a late show on car and motorcycle insurance. With Stephen Colbert hey, we lost the wifi password. Do you remember what that is . Tonight, curve your enthusiasm. Plus stephen welcomes ibram x. Kendi and Patton Oswalt, featuring jon batiste and stay homin. And now, live on tape ....