Man returns to gym to flex his smugness thedailymash.co.uk - get the latest breaking news, showbiz & celebrity photos, sport news & rumours, viral videos and top stories from thedailymash.co.uk Daily Mail and Mail on Sunday newspapers.
Man regrets building entire identity around moustache 19th February 2021
A MAN has admitted he regrets building his entire identity around his large waxed moustache.
Jack Browne of Bristol has an impressive moustache along with moustache-themed clothing, home decor, dinnerware and a host of moustache-grooming products, most of which are now largely redundant.
He said: “It’s really an impressive moustache. People used to say that to me. Now I say it to myself, in the mirror, trying to hold back tears.
“The thing is, having a physical attribute that people remark on was as good as a personality in the old world. In lockdown, it’s just a comedy Zoom filter that you can’t remove.
Arsehole calls cheese sandwich his lunch game thedailymash.co.uk - get the latest breaking news, showbiz & celebrity photos, sport news & rumours, viral videos and top stories from thedailymash.co.uk Daily Mail and Mail on Sunday newspapers.
Awful man calls cheese sandwich his lunch game 8th January 2021
AN unbearable man is referring to his hastily thrown together middle of the day meal as his ‘lunch game’.
Jack Browne enjoys talking up all the mundane parts of his life, from the ‘RSI-destroying set-up’ in the spare room where he works, to the strength of his immune system thanks to his ‘elite cold water shock therapy’ morning showers.
Browne said: “I like to keep on top of my lunch game, whether it’s throwing in some new pickle or surprising myself with a smear of hot sauce. The way I play the lunch game, it’s never just a cheese sandwich.