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Transcripts For COM Bad News Bears 20160528

motorcycle approaching ahhh. Got one of those for me . Nice try, you little creep. Mr. Buttermaker. Mr. Buttermaker. Youre late. I got held up, sorry about that. Are you drinking . Oh, hell, no. Thats, uh. Nonalcoholic. Im drivin, you know. laughs oh. Im so sorry. You hear that, toby . Drinking and driving dont mix. Thats right. Stay away from crack too. One hit of that stuff, and you wake up in prison married to some guy named big blue, and hes branding his initials in your ass with a hot coat hanger. I knew a guy. Uh uh uh, yes, crack. Is bad too. Yeah, i know, mom. But we are really excited to have you do this, and tobys really excited to play. Arent ya, honey . Uhhuh. Between his trumpet lessons, photo club, boy scouts and swimming, this is his favorite, isnt it, honey . Can you believe they tried to keep these kids out of the league . All kids should be able to play baseball, no matter what their skills. Well, i think they heard me loud and clear. All that aside, forget i filed th

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20160616

The front of the bus. I mean nobody cool sits up front that is nerd central. Yes. Well, i think there is some nuance there. I have been to the mountaintop, specifically my parents have a ski chalet there, its awesome. I think are you getting offer track here. Thats right. This Election Year white people are the key to everything. Everyone on both sides wants a piece of us. Now of course for Hillary Clinton support from white voters has been like her emails, hard to track down. Hillary clinton hasnt done well with white male voters. If Hillary Clinton cant hold those working white voters, shes going to lose. I think she needs to do more to reach white males. Man t feels good to be needed. And clinton is listening to what working white men want. Thats why her top vp choice is apparently a bottle of bud ducttaped to a pair of truck nuts. Right. And if that is not enough hillary has another secret weapon. Bill clinton has actually been used in a particular way where he is, you know, he tal

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20160711

Lollipops you were very brave applause my favorite part wasnt the parttime dentist manager, ults the fulltime crazy icelandic announcer. screaming unintelligible trevor mocking thats the commentator it sounds like someone is killing him in the announcer booth, but hes so committed to rise job that he doesnt stop commenting on the game screaming im dying now so much madness. One small group changing history to another, the Supreme Court. This week, you would have thought that game of thrones would have easily been the most exciting Season Finale but the Supreme Court blew it out of water and they only lost one character. laughter the court just ended its term yesterday but before they left they dropped some bombs. An evenly divided Supreme Court blocked the president S Immigration reform. The Supreme Court struck down a severe antiabortion law in texas. Supreme court voted unanimously to vacate former Virginia Governor Bob Mcdonalds conviction. Upheld affirmative Action Program in texas

Transcripts For COM The Nightly Show With Larry Wilmore 20160718

Air there was another Brutal Police killing going viral, this time the shooting of 32 year old philando castile. Thats how fast these things are happening sometimes here in merica. By the time we have gotten angry about one, its already over. But im still angry. And we should all be angry and were going to discuss this on our panel tonight. Please stick around for that, all right . Well go from one abusive power to another i want to talk about, lets go on to fox news. Yesterday, yesterday Grechen Carlson filed a lawsuit against the bejowled fox news chairman roger ailes, after he fired her from her 2 p. M. Hosting gig. Anyway, carlson claims she was fired after refusing sexual fans advances from him. Now while i cant say for sure if the claims are true, what i do know is that carlson was fired less than two weeks after saying that she supported a ban on assault weapons. And i also know that when it happened, we predicted she would be let go. By the way fox news employees are will be fo

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20160621

The big shakeup for the Donald Trump Campaign just weeks before the Republican Convention is set to begin. Trump campaigns manager Corey Lewandowski is out. He has been part of trumps innercircle from the very beginning, from even before day one. He is part of that sort of original group of Trump Supporters who were with him since he came down that escalator at trump tower. Trevor yes, the escalator that brought us trump. It almost seems like whoever was on that escalator ride got to be part of the Trump Campaign it doesnt seem like they were pandz. Trump was just riding and going who is this guy, i like his style, i like him, hes on. Sir, that is the keas later railing. Yeah, i want him on the campaign. I need more black support, ill take it. Circumstances i dont think he. Hurry, hes getting away, hes getting away so it appears coree lewandowskis grip on power was not as strong as his grip on young female reporters. And i can only imagine what it must have been like for him when done

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