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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20240622

Jon welcome to the daily show my name is jon stewart my guest tonight, Antman Antman will be joining us tonight cheers and applause while we were out, huge, important, the beast, revenge from tundz taker. And the iran deal. Also that. laughter Angela Merkel gave greet a deal dealing with greece is like the economic equivalent to sitting on greeces chest pinning down their hands and drooling into their mouth or as the germans call it, foreplay. laughter theres another tragic attack chattanooga, five servicemen lost their lives. When will this end . I dont know how ill talk about any of this. Donald trump is at it again cheers and applause jon and then he appeared. laughter donald trump. The patron saint of topical comedians who are just running out the clock. I mean, look. We did just have two weeks off from talking about trump a dumbspringa i called it. Just out of curiosity, what is he at again . Unleashing his latest political firestorm on a new target this time john mccain. Hes not

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20240622

Thats our show, everybody good night thanks a lot [ cheers and applause ] july 23, 2015. From comedy centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart cheers and applause jon hey welcome to the daily show im jon stewart weve got a good one for you tonight a fine program. My guest tonight, Tanehisi Coates hes written this incredible bach. Well get a chance to talk about that. But first the democratic process. laughter it is one of our most sacred obligations to protecting the integrity and the health of the great nation that we love so dealer. Dearly. laughter the primaries the elections for the presidency of the United States of america it is a task we must undertake with great discretion and seriousness of purpose. bleep laughter this guy is so much fun then then i see rick perry the other day. He put glasses on so people will think hes smart and it just doesnt work jon watching this man run for president its like eating ice cream on a roller coaste

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20240622

But speaking of president s, big news from yesterday. The white house taking jon stewart very seriously. Politico is reporting that stewart secretly viingtsed the white house. The president invited stewart to two secret white house meetings when he needed media support. Secretly meeting with president obama,. Secret meeting. Had secret meetings. Secretly working together for years. Jon oh [bleep] cheers and applause that i have to tell you this, that sounds so much more awesome than what happened. laughter basically the president of the United States called my office and asked twice if i would come to washington and meet with him. And i did. laughter wasnt really that big a deal am i was brought through the secret white house tunnel entrance at mt. Rushmore. It was a round table meeting with the president , elvis, still alive, minister farrakhan and the area 51 alien. But i remember, we opened with the traditional fall prayer, sukd on the blood of the rightous and took turns [bleep] th

Transcripts For COM The Nightly Show With Larry Wilmore 20240622

Captioning sponsored by Comedy Central cheers and applause larry thank you very much. Welcome to the nightly show. Man audience chanting larry i appreciate it. Normally that chant goes on for ten minutes so i appreciate it. laughter thank you very much. Im larry wilmore. Weve got a great show for you tonight. Comedian and comedy filmmaking legend judd apatow is joining me on the panel. cheers and applause also along with rapper actor 50 cent. 50 cent. cheers and applause oh. But before we get into our top story, ive got to talk about a very serious computer hack that will put millions of americans at risk. As you guys know, the state department and even president obamas email account have been hacked recently. But the latest one finally has people paying attention. Millions of cheating husbands and wives should be edge right on edge right now. Their names and other Sensitive Information could soon be exposed. Hackers have attacked the dating website Ashley Madison. Ashley madison marke

Transcripts For COM The Nightly Show With Larry Wilmore 20160513

Larry yes thank you very much thank you thank you youre so kind thank you so much thanks, i appreciate it such a great cowed welcome to the nightly show. Im larry wilmore. Such a great crowd. Audra mcdonald on the show tonight. Im very excited about that. cheers and applause so talented. One of the most talented people ever. Sure. By the way, first off, i want to show you something remarkable a rare moment of unanimous bipartisanship in the u. S. Senate. Anchor the Senate Unanimously passed a measure removing offensive terms such as oriental from federal law. Larry oriental . That term is still used in federal law . I can see why that was a unanimous decision trumpet playing taps oh, hey. Guys. Whats up . Bobby we lost another one. Were here to pay our respects. Benari damn p. C. Police, we cant have any fun anymore. Jack so, larry, if you dont mind, we would like to retire this word by hoisting it up into the rafters. Bobby it served us well for a long time. taps playing so long, orie

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