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Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20140925

Within thats our show. Here it is, your moment of zen. This is culd a keg stand apparently, i know nothing about how this works within i never heard of a keg stand. I never heard of a keg stand. I never did either, not to get off topic because i cheers and applause stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen cheers and applause stephen welcome to the report good to have you with us good to have you cheers and applause ladies and gentlemen, please, sit down. Folks, folks, let me say colbert nation, on this night, i found the shofar to herald the arrival of Rosh Hashanah, the jewish new year, may 5775 be a year of happiness. laughter i still got it. laughter nine years later it still tastes just as rammy as ever. Nice thing about a dead ram horn, it only it only gets dead ramier. And folks, im already enjoying the traditional Rosh Hashanah treat known among the jewish people and i hope im pronouncing th

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20140925

Stephen welcome to the report good to have you with us good to have you cheers and applause ladies and gentlemen, please, sit down. Folks, folks, let me say colbert nation, on this night, i found the shofar to herald the arrival of Rosh Hashanah, the jewish new year, may 5775 be a year of happiness. laughter i still got it. laughter nine years later it still tastes just as rammy as ever. Nice thing about a dead ram horn, it only it only gets dead ramier. And folks, im already enjoying the traditional Rosh Hashanah treat known among the jewish people and i hope im pronouncing this correctly, apples and chhoney. It expresses our hope for a sweet new year. And Rosh Hashanah Rosh Hashanah is just the beginning of the jewish high holiday fun. From now until yom kippur marks the time of solemn reflection and atonement known as the days of repentance, not to be confused with the upcoming blockbuster, transformers 5 days of repentance. applause stephen the plot centers on optimus primes bar mi

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20140925

cheers and applause stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen cheers and applause stephen welcome to the report good to have you with us good to have you cheers and applause ladies and gentlemen, please, sit down. Folks, folks, let me say colbert nation, on this night, i found the shofar to herald the arrival of Rosh Hashanah, the jewish new year, may 5775 be a year of happiness. laughter i still got it. laughter nine years later it still tastes just as rammy as ever. Nice thing about a dead ram horn, it only it only gets dead ramier. And folks, im already enjoying the traditional Rosh Hashanah treat known among the jewish people and i hope im pronouncing this correctly, apples and chhoney. It expresses our hope for a sweet new year. And Rosh Hashanah Rosh Hashanah is just the beginning of the jewish high holiday fun. From now until yom kippur marks the time of solemn reflection and atonement known

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20140926

The atonephone at 18886677539 that is 1888oopsjew. laughter of course, of course, folks, maintaining one triple 8 oopsjew does not come cheap that is one more thing for to you feel guilty about. That is why every year we defray some of the costs by sharing our line with other businesses that happen to have names that can be spelled using the name telephone number. For instance, this year, when you call please press 2 if you want at tonephone. If you press 1, you will be connected to 1888morskids a club for young telegraph enthusiasts f you press 3, you reach 1888morpkx, a legal hotline dedicate odd to the ever increasing list of exwives of my dear friend pk winstrom. Jim . Absolutely. Youve reach, 18889morspkx where we say its not about the kid, its about the money. If this is brenda, press 1. If this is vanessa press 2. If this is other brenda, press 3. If this is janine, shh, i havent told the others about you yet. Stephen finally, folks, if you press 4, will you get onpr lady, a sex

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20140929

These things unfolding, these episodes or anecdotes wherein the president seems to be at war not just with our cheers and applause stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen cheers and applause stephen welcome to the report good to have you with us good to have you cheers and applause ladies and gentlemen, please, sit down. Folks, folks, let me say colbert nation, on this night, i found the shofar to herald the arrival of Rosh Hashanah, the jewish new year, may 5775 be a year of happiness. laughter i still got it. laughter nine years later it still tastes just as rammy as ever. Nice thing about a dead ram horn, it only it only gets dead ramier. And folks, im already enjoying the traditional Rosh Hashanah treat known among the jewish people and i hope im pronouncing this correctly, apples and chhoney. It expresses our hope for a sweet new year. And Rosh Hashanah Rosh Hashanah is just the beginning of

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