Super commuters coming in from tracy this morning. On the altamont pass. You can see speeds dipping down we also live with at ts internet security. To 21 Miles Per Hour. Want to get past that, it is looking good because it is do you know the mothers maiden name . Friday light and the day after at t theres an army of weirdos outside. The Holiday Lights. Take a look at the south bay drive times. Theyre just trying to get on your network. You can see that all speeds are why didnt you alert us . Alerts arent really my thing. What is your thing . The green and that is good news ok, i am sensing a little hostility from you, janet. For south bay. East bay drive times are not looking bad either. So im going to be the grownup here and excuse myself. Everything is in the green and look at that on a 80, it is a 30 minute drive and once you stop living with at t. Switch to xfinity for realtime security alerts get to the bay bridge toll for all your connected devices. Plaza, just a few cars out the
Thank you. Hello. Las vegas, nevada. I appreciate it. Welcome. [ cheers and applause ] thank you for joining us on the strip for the first of five nights in vegas. Thats very kind. I dont know, how many just out of curiosity, how many locals do we have in the audience tonight . [ cheers and applause ] all right. Well, i see a lot of faces i know. I grew up here. We moved to las vegas when i was 9 years old. I went to kenny gwynn junior high school. [ cheers and applause ] i went to Clark High School. [ cheers and applause ] and then the university of nevada las vegas. [ cheers and applause ] i enrolled at unlv in the fall of 1985. As a young man i had the privilege of watching the great Jerry Tarkanian and his running rebels electrify this town. [ cheers and applause ] i started a promising career in high school at a store called millers outpost where selling parachute pants and shrink to fit jeans. I got my first job in broadcasting, unpaid of course, hosting a sunday night talk show
Yeah, hey, man, were glad youre Getting Better too. Heyhey, whats going on . Kyles all better, cartman, thanks to you. Huh . It was all a trick. Your mom undid the kidney blocker, and then we put ketchup in your bed so youd think we took your kidney. Yes, but it was all just a trick to get you to come in and sign this release. Isnt that funny, sweetie . Ugh, i am so pissed off oh, heres everybody. Hey, mr. Garrison. Where have you been . Boys, i have an announcement to make. Im not gonna be your teacher anymore. Ive become a bestselling author, and, kyle, i want you to have a signed copy as a getwell present. Oh. Thanks . I swear im gonna kill you guys careful, cartman. You might pop your stitches. [both laugh] what the oh, good, you got the crappy kidney. From Comedy Centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with trevor noah. cheers and applause trevor welcome to the daily show, everybody. Im trevor noah. Thank you so much for tuning in. Thank you all for co
Commanderinchief will spend the Holiday Weekend following his salute to america celebration on the 4th of july. The president is thinking of bypassing a ruling from the Supreme Court and adding the Citizenship Question on next years census. Were live in the white house with breaking details from the administration. Speaking out as he loses steam in the polls. Former Vice President joe biden latest defense as 2020 contenders campaign in texas this afternoon. Amazon turning 25. The challenges ahead as the tech giant marks a major milestone. Hiring bouncing back. The u. S. Economy added 224,000 jobs in june, beating wall street expectations, easing concerns about a economic slow down. Lets go to Edward Lawrence at white house. Reporter great to see you, jackie. Showing fundamentally the economy is very strong the Unemployment Rate ticked up to 3. 7 . It ticked up for a good reason. The size of the labor force grew. That means for people are looking for jobs. The president is still upset s
Star back then . [ laughter ] or did porn stars look like everyone . Im not sure. But fathers day of course is the day on which we punish dad for having sex with our mothers by forcing him to talk on the phone. [ laughter ] it was an especially special fathers day because we heard from some folks we havent heard from in quite a while, including bill cosby, who took time to tweet hey hey hey, its americas dad. I dont sleep. But to all the dads its an honor to be called a father. So lets make today a renewed oath to fulfilling our purpose, strengthening our families and communities. Well, thanks, dr. Huxtable. What an uplifting message from jail. [ laughter ] somebodys now slipping roofies into his own drinks. By the way, i dont think hey hey hey works anymore. As a general rule, your first Public Statement after going to prison for Sexual Assault shouldnt start with hey hey hey. [ laughter ] if you hear the words hey hey hey cover your drinks. Okay . And by the way, how is it that bill