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Every State s Favorite Pickup Lines

R Kelly Says He Doesn t Believe Any Allegations Against Diddy

Not really sure Kelly is the person you want coming to your defense but, hey.

Insecure Prick Immediately Talked Into Upgrade

TACOMA, WA Saying “Sure, man, let’s do it” in response to the suggestion he select a model that cost $750 more, local insecure prick Brent Linsky was immediately talked into an upgrade Monday, according to sources at an area Best Buy. “I’m definitely planning on having a lot of friends over, so if you think the…

Jeffrey Wright Was Once Replaced for This Shocking Reason

Man Tragically Unaware He Possesses Among The Top 5 Most Beautiful Assholes In America

POUGHKEEPSIE, NY Going about his daily life completely oblivious to his exceptional gift, area man Daniel Clark remains tragically unaware that he possesses one of the top five most beautiful assholes in America, sources confirmed Thursday. “Every single day this man wakes up, goes to work, and comes home without the…

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