Have we sung the National Anthem yet . Has that happened . [ laughter ] we have so much to get to. Starting with day two of the Democratic National convention in hilladelphia. Hillary clinton became the first woman to be nominated by a major party in the United States, which even if she doesnt win thats going to look great on her resume. The theme of the convention tonight was a liti fighting for children and families, which is definitely better than a lifetime of fighting children and families, which makes you realize the word for can make a very big difference. Bill clinton spoke tonight. He was the major speaker of the evening. Of course he strongly supported his wife to be our next president. In a surprise move asked Melania Trump to be his first lady. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] if hillary wins, it will be interesting to see because bill which is interesting. Weve had a first man on the moon, a first man to climb mt. Everest, a first man to run a fourminute mile. Nobody e
Thanks for braving the heat dome to be here. Have you heard about that . Its a new weather phenomenon, a heat dome. Causing unusually high temperatures in 21 dates. Its expected to get up to 115 degrees in some states. So dont go to those states, okay . And the fear is that the heat dome will turn into a thunder dome, and well have to turn to mad max to help us. [ laughter ] president obama took to twte heat. Drink water, stay out of the sun, and check on your neighbors. Can you imagine checking on your neighbors in l. A. . I live across the street, just checking on ya. Everything okay . Donald trump weighed in on the heat too, he tweeted, the sun is the worst. Hot, lazy, stupid, donothing sun is a big fat loser. He takes a more direct approach. In cleveland tonight, donald almost a full week of people kissing his ass, it was finally time to kiss it himself and kiss he did. Trump arrived atop a goldplated elephant firing bedazzled make America Great tshirts into the crowd. Not really.
Ow. I think its both of us. Why dont you go back to l. A. . Excuse me . Well, you dont like it here. These arent your people. And things are gonna get bad very quickly. Why do you care . Because youre in my way. chuckles i work in constituent casework, senator. Thats hardly in your way. Well, heres the thing, lana. Laurel. Youve been slinking around my chief of staff. Really . Ell you that . No, no. He doesnt know what youre about. I do. And what am i about . Unpredictability. I know how your brother will act. Strategists can read other strategists. But you. One day, youre emotional; the next, youre strategic; the next, youre. Having your woman time. My . Woman time . . You dont drink anymore, do you, senator . Oh, i drink my kalecelery smoothies. You should try em. No alcohol . My bodys a temple. Why do you drink . cause i like it. Its fun. There are other ways to have fun. Joining other likeminded people in completing a mission. Sounds like a blast. What are these maps about . Uh, of
Thank you for joining us. This is our by biannual after te full special in case three or four hours of the bachelorette wasnt enough for you. The emotional Season Finale of the bachelorette that confirmed it is possible to make a lifelong commitment to your soul mate even though you were making out with another guy a simple 24 hours before. Our hero forced to choose between robby, former competitive swimmer, and jordan, former quarterback. She had to choose between the guy who used to play football and the guy who used to swim. As you probably know, she chose the football guy. Jordan. Which makes me very happy. [ cheers and applause ] back in may, before the show really even started, i predicted she would pick jordan. Well, my wife told me she was going to pick jordan, so i i have now correctly predicted four of the last five winners of the bachelorette. [ cheers and applause ] and that, ladies and gentlemen, is why they call me rostradamus. Thank you. So both guys met jojos parents bu
Why dont you go back to l. A. . Excuse me . Well, you dont like it here. These arent your people. And things are gonna get bad very quickly. Why do you care . Because youre in my way. chuckles i work in constituent casework, senator. Thats hardly in your way. Well, heres the thing, lana. Laurel. Youve been slinking around my chief of staff. Really . Distracting him. What youre about. I do. And what am i about . Unpredictability. I know how your brother will act. Strategists can read other strategists. But you. One day, youre emotional; the next, youre strategic; the next, youre. Having your woman time. My . Woman time . . You dont drink anymore, do you, senator . Oh, i drink my kalecelery smoothies. You should try em. No alcohol . My bodys a temple. Why do you drink . cause i like it. Its fun. There are other ways to have fun. Joining other likeminded people in completing a mission. Sounds like a blast. What are these maps about . Uh, office work product. Its not very smart of you to l