Friday. Pantsfree friday. Get it right. Stephanie she started with help me. Im having all sorts of technical problems. [ mysterious music ] stephanie oh, look who is here right on time as usual, its jim ward. The good news is thank god we dont need a journalistic goddess, the guy who owns the show sent us the news yesterday that susan rice withdrew. [ laughter ] if only we had a tv. Stephanie right or computers. Here she is news goddess Jacki Schechner. Secretary of defense has authorized deployment of 400 troops to man the turkey syria border. They are emphasizing this is only a defensive mission. Susan rice will meet with president obama at the white house today. He has already accepted her withdraw for consideration to replace Hillary Clinton. She is a fighter but not at the cost of what is right with the country. The president praised her strength of character, and called the attacks on her in recent weeks unfair and misleading. The reaction to the withdrawal were short and dismissive. The behavior of certain republican senators was a disgrace on National Security issues. Im not mad at you. Im just very disappointed. We have always heard that from our grade school teachers. Stephanie several republican senator went after rice following the attack on the consolelate in benghazi. Abc pointing out that rice had been criticized before specifically for her past work during the clinton administration. Aledgedly she was a little too sympathetic to the row juan dan president at the time. But there is conflicting reports. Thats from my upcoming benefit for victims of hurricane sandy. I booked the strongest, smartest comics i could find. My comedian friends and i will raise money to rebuild homes and lives one laugh at a time. Awe damn, the lights are out you know what . Ill watch a Little Television until they come back on. Only on current tv. [ technical difficulties ] it got great reviews when it was on broadway. Stephanie right, were going for booze and dope after the play. You should go to porter grill while you are downtown there. Stephanie okay. Stephanie susan [ inaudible ] owns the place. Stephanie awesome. Lets tell everybody where were going to be. [ applause ] [ laughter ] stephanie exactly. For all of you pervs out there. Sorry mrs. Schechner. Washington stephanie kids see what you see right here in the studio. This is the opening act of sexy liberal dc. Did you hear were getting a tour of the white house. I dont think you are supposed to say that. You ruined it for us. Yeah you have to pass a background check. Stephanie i have some time to clean some things up. Yeah. Get harvie kitel to get the blood and brain matter out of the car. Stephanie yeah. Rolland sexy liberal tour director says there are some great 45 seats in the lower balcony. The 45 seats have amazing views of the stage. There are probably only about 100 orchestra seats left. And then we have two huge surprise celebrity guests on panel. I dont know either of them. Stephanie you dont . No. Stephanie oh my god you are going to [ censor bleep ] yourself. It smells like somebody did in here can we please not bring in salmon and Brussel Sprouts on the same day . I burned them look at that. Blackened Brussel Sprouts. Im excited to go spinning with you. Stephanie katherine in pittsburgh, listen every day through iheart radio. I captured the moment you were tea bagged by rob reiner. Oh, here. Stephanie wow, its a rearview. Oh geez. [ applause ] i think it is better than being tea bagged by carol oconnor. Well, since he is dead. [ wah wah ] what . Too soon . Stephanie this week is just the gift that keeps on giving. The hate mail just keeps coming from fox news. Hateful hating haters i hate you stephanie do we have that whole song . The thing we played . My sister said it was such a cute little song parody. But they are proving my point exactly. I play some cute little song parody, and i get called the c word and they hope i die. And the point of the segment is the leftwing is engaged in more hate speech than the rightwing. So is this the whole song . Yeah. Wing nuts roasting for mittys fire pundits growing a big nose stocking toys being sold by big liars, like fox and friends media hosts Everybody Knows a turkey like sean hannity has an audience thats white tiny brains viewers who just dont know that what he says just isnt right stephanie all right. [ applause ] the entire viewership is almost exclusively old and white. Stephanie he opened by saying i called him a racist. Mary who sang that she could not have been more excited. She is like me on fox. [ explosion ] stephanie like christmas came early for her and Rocky Mountain mike. Hi, steph words cant describe how excited i was on fox news. We are legend cookies and freedom for everybody. [ applause ] hate hate why do the liberals hate so much . [ laughter ] its amazing we are the big ten exclusive party. Stephanie right. Jim said yes, sean hannity is so thin skinned he is nearly translousent. Stephanie this one the subject line is sad. I heard a bit from her show this went to travis for some reason. Mr. Travis. Yeah. Stephanie i heard a bit from her show, and what a idiot, you liberals are racist and violent. You are an ist. Stephanie wow, radical muslims stephanie by the way where is my Christmas Music. [ Christmas Music ] stephanie God Bless America and Merry ChristmasMerry Christmas bitch we havent had a single marksist stephanie how about this one . Somebody spilled like rum and coke on their caps lock. Marxist atheist muslims this is rum and coke . I think it looks more like moon shine and mountain due. Stephanie oh thats right. The original mountain dew was moon shine. Stephanie his email name is actually complainant. I love that. Stephanie i think he complains a lot about a lot of stuff. So maybe im not even that special. Complainant writes racist blood sucker. Democrats are just what you are. Gutter rats you have a tiny brain and you you stupid poopy head [ laughter ] how is that spelled . Stephanie how could you feel good about yourself you racist pig . Based on what exactly . Stephanie that we played this song. Stephanie he is not sticking to points. Usually they say i have no ratings. But he says im being a racist pig to get ratings. You are nothing but a rating whore. Well thats radio. [ laughter ] you stood naked in a barrel in a shop window to get ratings. That was a whacky morning radio d. J. Thats when i was sister sleaze dont bring that up. You are igniting the racial element for your audience. What a vacuumous pig you are. Usually vak wows doesnt make it to west virginia. Stephanie chris, you have no proof he is from west virginia. Stephanie thats a little manic. Ha ha ha stephanie good look swirling in your bowel of sewage steph. [ laughter ] stephanie ps, oh hang on theres a hopeful note at the end. Ps i might be a new listener if you do the following. A list of demands. [ laughter ] stephanie can you send me a hat. Do what i say or ill shoot. Well, ratings whore what does he want. Stephanie explain why the president would lie about benghazi. [ wah wah ] stephanie oh damn that was so hopeful for a minute. Thats like the email equivalent of pasting the letters from a magazine. A ransom letter. By the way the song which we didnt write, said seans audience is old and white. They are old and white and pasty people. Stephanie we apologize to the pasty people in the audience. Steph are you spending sean hannity and his listeners pro flowers . After all he was 80 of the show yesterday. [ applause ] stephanie thats true. I think i will. Send him a sodastream. [ laughter ] stephanie why what a good idea. 18 minutes after the hour. You know [ applause ] timing . Stephanie even sean hannity wont be quite as grumpy if he has a sodastream. I have looked forward to being able to weigh in on sodastream live. Because i have one and i love it. What is your favorite flavor. I dont use the flavors i make spell er. Stephanie she hasnt consumed anything with calories for years. [ laughter ] stephanie sodastream it transforms water into fresh fizzy soda or seltzer as Jacki Schechner likes to call it. Its simple to use you fill the bottle were going to get notes on this thing. I think we are. Stephanie there are over 60 flavors. Name brands . Stephanie yes. Like . Stephanie country time and crystal light. Thats my favorite. Prices start around 80. And its pretty, right . It is. Very easy to use. Stephanie at bed bath and beyond macys kohls or go to sodastream. Com for a location closest to you. Stephanie well be right back on the Stephanie Miller show. And well be right back. Announcer its the Stephanie Miller show. nn5959onn vo missed some of the insights, analysis and laughs . Im a slutty bob hope. The troops love me. The sweatshirt is nice and all but i could use a golden lasso. Announcer Stephanie Miller. Dont be fizzy, just get dizzy, why so serious so raise your glass if you are wrong in the right ways all my underdogs stephanie all right. All right. Everybody settle. Settle. It is the Stephanie Miller show. Welcome it to. Thirtythirty minutes after the hour. Hi, Jacki Schechner. Look at my beaver. Good morning. You know i came in just to see your beaver. Stephanie its bucky the christmas beaver. I would not turn down i would not turn down the opportunity to see stephs beaver. No, and who would. Kelby loves to focus on your beaver. Stephanie oh. By the way we missed their birthday. Happy birthday. Dory in massachusetts. Caller good morning, darling. Today is my birthday and since i have the [ inaudible ] all over me, i would like to ask squeezy to wish me a happy birthday. [ heavy breathing ] what are you wearing . I bet you are in your birthday suit. Stephanie dont encourage him. For gods sake. What is going on with janet in georgia. Welcome. Caller hi, steph and mooks im calling from a red state and i wanted to ask the health care geek what is going to happen now that our republican governor has turned down the expansion of the medicaid. Well, the Supreme Court ruled that the federal government couldnt require states to expand medicaid, so unfortunately there will be a lot of people who fall below 133 of the Poverty Level in your state who would have had access to health care who now probably wont. I dont know what the contingency plans are for that or statewide what they are going to do, but the reason why it is such a good idea for states to taken that opportunity, was the federal government said well pick up the tab 100 for the first three years and 90 after that. So it is not going to cost the states anything to expand medicaid and cover people who fall below 133 of the poverty line. Its unfortunate the Supreme Court ruled that the states werent going to be required to do it. Stephanie i dont know if the Supreme Court takes into account how much the republicans will do just to spite the president. Caller that exexactly why this is being done. Stephanie yeah, thats what i mean. You were saying these fiscal cliff negotiations its presuming their care for something other than their own power. Thats what were walking about peoples lives. Stephanie and its completely counter intuitive. They are screaming Smaller GovernmentSmaller Government and now the federal government will have to do it for them. Yeah. Stephanie this is a love letter to my listeners [ romantic music ] stephanie we are just a dysfunctional little loving family. I missed this i also missed Rocky Mountain mikes birthday. But one of our listeners knew. Steph, because Rocky Mountain mike has given us so much joy this year, i thought i would try to return a song parody. But needed help downloading the karaoke, and my tom, my friend dean found a moment to record it. Here is a little part of it. He was born in the winter of his 50something year moving out to a place he had never been before he left [ inaudible ] behind him for the aspen trees he loves when he first came to the mountains, he already had a bed for the parodies he wrote for stephfys show and he did not disappoint he continued to amuse how he does it we dont really know stephanie no. But its happy birthday Rocky Mountain mike [ inaudible ] hello skeeter, goodbye mitt even more to life that twists Rocky Mountain mike Rocky Mountain mike [ applause ] stephanie ah thanks kids. How cute are your listeners stephanie i remember when Rocky Mountain mike first moved to the Rocky Mountains, he didnt have wifi, so he sat in the parking lot of the hotel to send us his bits. Stephanie ah. Twentynine minutes after the hour, back with representative gwen moore so update us on the fiscal cliff, as we continue on the Stephanie Miller show. Nobody knows disasters like comedians. New york, the hightech resilient city. Just dont get us wet. What the hell was that . Thats from my upcoming benefit for victims of hurricane sandy. I booked the strongest, smartest comics i could find. My comedian friends and i will raise money to rebuild homes and lives one laugh at a time. Awe damn, the lights are out you know what . Ill watch a Little Television until they come back on. Only on current tv. Announcer Stephanie Miller. I think i figured out why you are so cranky. Christmas is four days away and you dont even have a tree. Stephanie wa. What . Stephanie i have no one to put a tree up with. [ wah wah ] that was the saddest thing i have ever heard. Stephanie listen, i have the fiscal cliff to entertain me. Fiscal cliff clavin. Stephanie boner said ifs as and buts or only candy and nuts. [ applause ] stephanie representative gwen moore im so glad to have you on. Im so glad to be with you again. Stephanie are you hearing any progress being made . No, im not. I think theres some really wide idealogical kinds of differences. Everybody, stephanie knows we have got to deal with some debt reduction, but the the real Sticking Point is whether or not were going to throw the country into an austerity cliff, and really make the middle class, and pour people bare the burden of deficit reduction, or whether or not were going to ask people who are wealthier to sort of pick up some of the burden of the tenyear hiatus that they have had in making a real contribution. And i think thats a really wide wide goal. Stephanie representative moore, you can looking at the same polls we are, and it seems like they are getting worse for republicans. 75 of americans want the wealthier americans to pay their fair share and they dont want medicare or Social Security touched. Exactly. Stephanie who are they fighting for at this point . Well, i can tell you that the very rich and powerful have sent out various threats to the gop, you know, that if you dont do our bidding, were not going to fund your campaigns; that we want, you know Government Spending to yield to our corporatist interests, and, you know, take for example this demand from speaker boehner, that we do 800 billion in cuts in the social safety net. I mean thats coming straight from from corporate america. I mean they want to change the Social Security, cut 200 billion out of that. They want to cut 600 billion out of medicare by raising the medicare eligibility age to 67. This is what they campaigned on romney and paul ryan and they want to win by negotiation kiosk. They dont care that this is unpopular with the public. Stephanie right. Their masters have said that this is the demand that we want to make. Our counterproposal is sure we would love to change medicare but what we want to do is for example negotiate drug costs with the drug companies. That would give us at least 300, 400 billion over ten years. So we want to take it away from the very wealthy pharmaceutical companies, and they are saying no, you got to get this out of Social Security and benefits. So thats the difference. Stephanie yeah, and im looking like i say this is not even just polling. It is nonpartisan. The republicans screamed about this report, so they redid it and it reached the same conclusion. Exactly. Stephanie over the past 65 years the reduction in top tax rates has had little association with savingser our productivity growth. And this puts a steak in the heart of the republican argument that it somehow curves economic growth. Well, stephanie, the whole notion of the job creators, we cant hurt the job creators by taking money away from them. The point is they are not hiring because of these taxes. You get every single penny that you spend on payroll is deductible. Duh every single penny that you spend on renting, leasing, buying space is deductible. Stephanie right. From your income no matter how you are filing. So thats ludicrous that somehow rewarding income above 250,000 you know, somehow creates jobs. We know who creates jobs, the struggling brand new entrepreneurs who are bringing new people on and the president has provided 18 different tax cuts for Small Businesses. You know, we need to target help to Small Businesses more accurately instead of this fantasy stephanie yep. As you might characterize it, that somehow if we provide tax breaks for millionaires and billionaires, well just magically help. Stephanie you have no idea how much the mocking tone of your voice is appreciated on this show. [ laughter ] stephanie representative before you go, wanted to get your take we have been talking about susan rice withdrawing. I just thought it was disgraceful that this accomplished woman became a political target of the republicans for no good reason and now has lost the opportunity to serve as secretary of state. Oh, stephanie, there is so much to be said about that. When you talk about raw politics this is it. I think that they think they have a shot at that senate state if john kerry were appointed stephanie yeah, someones career has to be sacrificed for pure partisan politics. It really is a sad day, i think. I think so too. Republicans do much better in specht elections. Money goes a lot further. The coalition that took president obama and elizabeth warren, quite frankly to the top may not turn out in a special election, and they are banking on on as close as it was it was much closer than romney and obama in massachusetts stephanie right. And thats what they count on is less turnout trying to suppress the vote. Thats right. So the thing of it is is we need to really hone in on educating the voters in massachusetts. All hands on deck for this special election, if in fact he does appoint john kerry. But in the short run they have won. In the long run, you know, its incumbent upon us to make sure they are tone deaf. They still havent heard the message, which is hey you are kicking around another woman, this war on women continues. You have thrown her out for no reason, war on people of color. This is the coalition that will keep you out of power from now on. Stephanie yeah. And once again here is a woman who did absolutely nothing. Stephanie yep. And, you know, you pulled together this minority voice poor mccain. I still respect him stephanie. Stephanie i know. I used to respect him. War hero, um but i think that this is a very shortterm victory for them. Stephanie i hope so. Representative gwen moore you are a pleasure. Thanks for taking time with us in the middle of what must just be a delightful time in the congress. [ laughter ] stephanie thank you so much. All right. Byebye. [ applause ] stephanie she is awesome. Susan rice yesterday. I withdrew my name because i think its the right thing for the country and the president , and putting those things together that makes it the right thing for me and my family however if scott brown gets his senate seat back then this whole thing will end in catastrophe. Stephanie yeah. Oh, we loved john kerry. Stephanie yeah we have always loved john kerry. Its like when participate took [ inaudible ] out of arizona and saddled them with jan brewer. Bone finger. Stephanie this is another sorry episode of the personal destruction in washington. The senator has wondered about her temperament for a job she was only rumored to be appointed. Who said that . [ inaudible ]. [ buzzer ] stephanie no. [ inaudible ] [ inaudible ]. Who said petty and otherwises. Who said that . [ inaudible ] crusader . [ buzzer ] stephanie same guy. Washington post. Susan rice. I didnt want to see a process that was very prolonged, politicized, distracting and disruptive, because there are so many things we need to get done as a country. Stephanie imagine that putting the Country First instead of your own personal power. Hum. I have all my life been a public servant. I am not a political person at my foundation. As i have in academia and think tanks, i have tried to do the right thing. Oh she thinks she is so smart, flabbergasting. [ laughter ] does she work in a tavern . Stephanie right. One option being discussed he could appoint her National Security advisor. Thats good. Stephanie the president said while i deeply regret the unreasonable attacks on her, she rises above that to put our National Interests first. So which we say it aint a mans world stephanie i think it will be john kerry, but you were saying jacki, chuck hagel is the rumor for secretary of defense. You mean you steal my news even when im in the room. I was going to do a whole thing. Forget it for 15 minutes, and then well do it again. [ wah wah ] you are getting sleepy. [ mysterious music ] stephanie well have entirely new people in 15 minutes. His two will be long gone. Its my bad. I should have warned you. Stephanie he is one of those Reasonable Republicans shhhh. No, we can talk about that. He is of the [ inaudible ] of mccain, back when mccain was reasonable when mccain was sane. Stephanie he endorsed john kerry in november, and opposed the decision to invade iraq and the serge, so what can be so bad about him . [ applause ] nice, good guy. Stephanie which is why theres no room for him in the republican party. Yeah. Stephanie fortyseven minutes after the hour. Right back on the Stephanie Miller show. Announcer theres a tea party in her pants and you are invited. That youre gonna lay people off because now the governments going to help you fund your health care. Really . I wanna be able to have those conversations. Not just to be confrontational but to understand what the other side is saying. And you know, id like to arm our viewers with the ability to argue with their conservative uncle joe over the dinner table. Rich, chewy caramel rolled up in smooth milk chocolate. Dont forget about that payroll meeting. Rolo. Get your smooth on. Also in minis. She gets the comedians laughing. Thats hilarious . And the thinkers thinking. Okay, so theres wiggleroom in the Ten Commandments is what youre telling me. Shes joy behar. And current will let me say anything. Only on current tv. Announcer Stephanie Miller. You can act real rude like an icicle in brazil we can dance, we can dance, everything is under control we can dance in a field with midgets wearing [ inaudible ] clothes. Little person. Stephanie david bender with some breaking news from massachusetts. Good morning, david bender. Good morning, Stephanie Miller show. It is not safe for anybody when you dance in the chair. Stephanie okay. I heard you talking about speculation, and obviously [ inaudible ] special election works better for republicans. Here is what they dont get. They dont get frankly the senator should not give up whatever his new day job is im sure it is, you know working on his abs. But he has 400,000 in the bank. Ed marky who is great one of the great members of oops. He is a wonderful guy, has 3. 5 stephanie somebody is calling you to tell you are on the Stephanie Miller show by the way. You keep cutting out. Any way [ overlapping speakers ] am i on the Stephanie Miller show now . Stephanie yes, you are. Ed marky has more money and not to worry. He has five times as much money, and it is going to be a shortterm appointment, and then they have the special election. Remember how this works. There is a guy named barney Frank Stephanie yes, i heard of him. Who could be an interim appointment stephanie interesting. Ah and then when the special election happens if ed marky decides not to run there is another guy in massachusetts who could kick scott browns ass. His name is Deval Patrick. Stephanie oh unlike mitt romney he did a good job as governor of massachusetts. Stephanie any of those people could get it done. Brought to you by granger for the ones who get it done. Thank you david bender. Happy holidays everyone. Stephanie lets dive into the rightwing world. Newt gingrich on hannity talking about susan rice. The fact is in the case of ambassador rice, she is a person who has agreements with the president. She was sent out by the president to say thanks that were falsed. She was used to tell the American People something that was not true. And if she has a complaint with anybody, it ought to be with president obama so went her out there. Stephanie are you kidding me . Really . It was what the Intelligence Community thought at the time. Okay. Stewart barney. The right to work is now enshrined in michigan. The right not to be forced to Pay Union Dues is enshrined in michigan and 23 other states. I think that is a flatout good thing. Stephanie unless you are a worker in michigan. But he thinks pearl harbor was a good idea. Stephanie we have no evidence here at the Stephanie Miller show that he thinks that. Ann coulter. All of the people who want to work have left the state. Not all of them there are a few left behind. But this mob cannot learn they would put their hand on a burning fire over and over again. They havent noticed that by supporting these unions they have lost the Car Companies. They have lost jobs. What . Stephanie the Car Companies were saved and so were millions of jobs. What . By the way another hannity letter for me. Steph racial outreach carried across the ballroom by a black man and smooched. I bet hannity cant make that claim. As far as we know. Stephanie [ inaudible ] on the five. What was once a membership of hardworking men and women big labor has degenerated in to a group of thugs. [ overlapping speakers ] and violent assault. He is talking about the aledged comedian who pushed the guy on the ground and the guy retaliated. Stephanie yes, the video has gone viral. A Police Spokesman there said i saw mr. Crowders interview on sean hannity who wants to have an mma fight with this individual. He said you cant leverage the law for personal gain. Either you are a victor or you are not. According to the actual video, he started it. Yeah. All right. If he wants an mma fight, he can go up against a real mms fighter. Stephanie crowder posted on line, it appears quite clearly he left out an important section of footage. The man who punched him to the ground seconds before and then getting up and taking a swing at the comedian. Witnesses who were there were saying he tries to start something. Do we have time . No. Stephanie okay. We should save this anyway for my personal comedy jesus. Thats what i was thinking. Stephanie fridays with fugelsang next on the Stephanie Miller show. [ theme music ] stephanie that was so broadcast news. People just brought up in jackis newscast right this second. Look at me im dumpster guy. Why are you doing that . Can i help you please . Stephanie no im fine. Buck stephanie bucky help us bucky my christmas beaver. Jacki just slid in here i dont have any news chris was like what tbone. Stephanie it was like chariots of fire bringing me a highlighter. The best part was when steph said did you get that printed at 6 22. And she said oh you mean the thing i just read. Here she is Jacki Schechner. Now that susan rice has taken herself out of the running for secretary of state, john kerry is a likely nominee. Then it is up to Deval Patrick to appoint his replacement. The fear amongst democrats is that we would see the return of scott brown. Two names coming up to fill kerrys seat one is representative ed marky, or vicky kennedy. Stephanie oh he spoke with ted kennedys widow about whether she was be interested, and she has not officially ruled it out. Now they are talk about chuck hagel stephanie i hadnt heard that. I know because it didnt come up in the last hour. He is a republican but a moderate one, a vietnam war vet, he was against the surge in iraq, and for the troop withdrawal. The only hang up may be his policy on israel; that he has a history of being antiisrael, according to some supporters, and that may draw some fire. Stephanie is vern [ inaudible ] on the short list . [ laughter ] were back after the break. Just dont get us wet. What the hell was that . Thats from my upcoming benefit for victims of hurricane sandy. I booked the strongest, smartest comics i could find. My comedian friends and i will raise money to rebuild homes and lives one laugh at a time. Awe damn, the lights are out you know what . Ill watch a Little Television until they come back on. Only on current tv. Did you get chips for the party . Nope. Cheese plate . Cheese plate. Nope. I made something better. You used the oven . Boom [ male announcer ] pillsbury crescents. Let the making begin. [ female announcer ] why settle for plain bread . Heres a better idea. Pillsbury grands flaky layers biscuits in just 15 minutes the light delicate layers add a layer of warmth to your next dinner. Pillsbury grands biscuits let the making begin. [ theme music ] announcer ladies and gentlemen, its the Stephanie Miller show im walking on sunshine, woe ho im walking on sunshine woe ho its time to feel good hey all right now its time to feel good stephanie yeehaw happy friday. Stephaniemiller. Com check it out you can email us all there. Its friday. You know what that means . Fugelsang, fugelsang, fugelsang, hes so fine wish he were mine fugelsang, fugelsang, fugelsang stephanie hello, John Fugelsang . Good morning my steph heads how is everybody doing out there in l. A. Where it is not all freezing and cold. Oh my god its in the 40s. Stephanie yeah, i had to wear a sweater. Sexy liberal tickets going fast. You dont even know this yet, two huge celebrity guests on panel. Chris, jim, and jacki all opening for us. Chris writes it took me a while to get used to your format. I just bought vip tickets to the show for d. C. In january. [ applause ] i heard a rumor that all of the vip tickets sold out within days of going on sale. Stephanie yeah, so it a smaller venue than we are used to, so nothing but great views. Get it. John fugelsang we just had joy behar on this morning to promos the comedy relief thing you guys did. [ world news tonight theme ] thats fantastic. Stephanie what a lineup you guys had . Yeah, what a show. We had to change it to a twohour special. Really. Stephanie yeah, i know. It sounds amazing. We got a great review in the wall street journal. Current and comedy got a great review. Stephanie wow. Tell who is on it. Stephanie there is you, jon stewart, larry david go ahead. Colin quinn. Joy behar. Stephanie susie essman. Daryle hammond. Theres greetings from al gore and steve colbert. Its a really great show stephanie who knew joy behar knew some famous comedians she could call to put it together. We have invited Paul Mccartney and the nirvana survivors, but i dont think they are going to come. Stephanie gop aid asks why dont we wait a few months to deliver sandy disaster relief. He said it didnt have the justifying documents. Why not wait a few months so we can do that . Yeah, let more people die. Stephanie a democratic aid to the congressman said homeowners families and Small Business cannot wait a few months, they need help now. If it was five years ago in iraq they would have the money right away. But they say let the black guy pay for it. Stephanie exactly. John fugelsang we saved Pat Robertson for you. The president is an ideologue, he wants to redistribute growth and absurd the government. He has already taken over a good part of health care. He wants to take over the financial services. He wants to take over everything. And control it. What do you call that . Its socialism. Thats what it is. I think he thinks ideologically, i must cripple the capitolist class, cripple the Business Owners and destroy Free Enterprise system in america. There is not a single true thing he just said but this is Pat Robertson, his job is getting old people afraid of dying to second him money. Stephanie thats right. And we end with Rush Limbaugh. Clarence thomas indicates you dont have to do affirmative action, you dont have to have the blessing of jesse jackson. You realize what a threat that is in the Civil Rights Coalition . Do you realize what a threat that is to the democrat party. They want the minorities thinking they dont have a chance unless they the democrats are their champions. Oh, wow. Clarence thomas wouldnt be there without affirmative action. Stephanie yeah. We also might because he is a really bad justice who has never actually said anything no ability. He never writes and falls asleep in meetings. And thats exactly what Rush Limbaugh wants. Stephanie by the way [ world news tonight theme ] stephanie the big case coming up in the Supreme CourtMarriage Equality doma Lindsay Graham next to his lover john mccain [ buzzer ] stephanie no, i didnt say that. He says the United StatesSupreme Court should not rule that lbgt couples should not be allowed to marry because it is like banning a constitutional amendment. My favorite kind of homophobes are the gay ones. Stephanie allegedly. I only heard it from tea party websites. This entire puppet show that john mccain and Lindsay Graham have done right now john mccain is waiving susan rices scalp around trying to make his former friends like him again. So when you make a joke like i just did that they will finally find him butch, youll find the conservative straight homophobes get so upset. Stephanie he said in my state were not going to change the traditional definition of marriage he is a confirmed bachelor, isnt he . I support the traditional definition of marriage not out of hate but i think its gist best for society. Its for society, not for him. He never settled down. He is a bachelor. Lindsay has a friend he lives with a friend. My manner is man servant. Stephanie he said here is a country that stands on the grounds of Freedom Democracy and equality. Are you telling me thats fine as long as you live in the same state. John mccain, lindsays lover [ buzzer ] stop it. Stephanie the constitution of the United States have all rights re morgan said would you allow slavery in some states but not others . Very good point. Stephanie yes. Coming from a guy from the uk. Stephanie and then graham says slavery was outlawed by a constitutional amendment. The question is who should decide these things . I come out on the side of the people themselves. Stephanie to me to compare it to slavery isnt that great . Stephanie legalizing samesex marriage passes then its the law of the land. Grahams enshrined in the constitution with the threefifths compromise. President lincolns proclamation declaring saves free it was after so many people died that the threefifths was rendered moot. So were hoping were going to win on the 13th amendment. Exactly. I think we should get an office poll going on which state is the last to legalize samesex marriage. Stephanie Charlie Pierce said would i do it today . No. Jesus Chris Stephanie there is a new rapy republican. A judge said a rape victim quote unquote, didnt put up a fight. And if the body doesnt want to get pregnant, the body will stop it from happening. Oh my god. Is there some sort of chat room that these people get this. He goes to the same bathhouse as zimmerman. Or Lindsay Graham. Yeah. Stephanie hello aaron you are on the Stephanie Miller show. Caller how are you doing . Stephanie good. Caller i just want to say a couple of things about the reaganomics things they are resurrecting. George senior valued it voodoo economics. Stephanie thats right. Caller im going to clean up just a little bit because im not in the service anymore. It says the cc flows downhill so keep your mouth closed. They call it the trickle down because its really about the gush up. Stephanie oh you are going to produce another Rick Santorum surge no, its not the trickle down, its what is gushing up to the upper 2 . Stephanie im a little nauseated. I need to make a queef a brief break. I did not say that. Yes, you did. You sure did. Announcer if you turn her on, shell turn you on. Oh, god announcer its the Stephanie Miller show. I think the number one thing that viewers like about the young turks is that were honest. They can question whether im right, but i think that the audience gets that this guy, to the best of his ability, is trying to look out for us. Announcer Stephanie Miller. Working for the weekend, oh, you want to be in the show come on baby lets go stephanie jacki is giving jim an early christmas present. She is going to switch into her spinning clothes before the end of the hour. Thats a good reason to guy the steph cast at for 4. 95. Okay. I inadvertently said a really dirty thing. Even hal noticed stephanie whatever hal i have enough people here to correct me, but its not you that was pretty egregious, though. Stephanie John Fugelsang i hate everyone but you. Thank you. Ill exploit that to the max. Stephanie could you take out your organ for me. Thank you. [ organ music ] stephanie bill oreilly is turning against christians who he says have not been outraged enough about the war on christians. [ laughter ] stephanie he asked pastor robert [ inaudible ] that guy jeffers said a lot of leaders see jesus as this little whimpy guy. Oreilly said there is a problem in america with christian forces being weak. He said thats right. Im telling you, bill whimpy pastors produce whimpy christians and thats why were looking the war. The beautiful thing here is that happy holidays is more christian than Merry Christmas. You want to blame someone for saying happy holidays you blame capitolism and the Business Community for not wanting to alienate your nonchristian customers. Thats called doing good business. And being christian is being loving to others. Bill oreilly is the most fake christian that we have got. I was deeply offended because in my neighborhood i saw that had a happy holidays banner my local porn and bong shop and i felt so betrayed. And by the way now they think jesus was born in july. So there you go. Stephanie jesus with a gemini, that explains a lot. It explains a lot. And all im sticking up for is the baby jesus. Stephanie all right. Onion headline area woman just itching to complain if anyone complains of a nativity scene in the park. She is chopping at the bit to complain. Someone is bound to say something, and when they do ill be ready to unleash a tirade. At press time a disappointed jacobson looked down as a middle eastern woman commented that it was very nice. [ applause ] keep christ in christmas. Then keep capitolism out of it this is where we give materialal possessions to the guy who renounced materialal possessions. Stephanie here on the Stephanie Miller show we celebrate [ inaudible ]. Yeah, and one last thing. On his worst day jesus didnt play victim. Okay . Like sean hannity. Oh by the way where is my Rocky Mountain mike song that poked sean hannity with a sharp stick. You missed that i made the Sean Hannity Show again. Congratulations. Stephanie im going to hell apparently one viewer said i can go to hell for song parities. Really . Stephanie yes. At least youll be in hell with all of the cool people and interesting music. Stephanie and just to make sure i will get. Rocky mountain mike. Who cant take a joke now [ inaudible ] whines just like a baby and [ inaudible ] all his wounds oh, the hannity man, the hannity man hannity stephanie marla in michigan you are on the Stephanie Miller show. Caller hey, steph. I love your show. Except i have one complaint. We know republicans are a menace to society. Stephanie oh, dear. Caller we know that but i think you spend a little too much time talking about them. I know what they say. So just a little less time talking about them would be nice. Stephanie really . What would we talk about then . You can talk about some things, but sean hannity who cares what that moron things . I disagree, there are lot of people out in this beautiful wonderful country who feel really alone. And we are the sanity force. Stephanie we are the sanity to fight the hannity. We have a little bit of breaking news coming out of connecticut. Jacki . Yeah, it looks like there is a School Shooting in newton connecticut, and the gunman has been killed but theres no word yet on other sources an elementary school. Yes but people are saying there are some injuries some reports saying children, some saying all adults. Shortly after 9 40 am Police Reported there was a shooter in the main office of the school. So now they are in lockdown. Kindergarten classes have been canceled. There are a number of personnel on the scene that are helping out. Were waiting for more information to come in. There is a tag on twitter newton that has a scroll updating information. Okay. So well keep an eye on that. At least one dead. Thats the gunman from what i could tell. All right. Well monitor that as the show goes on. Thank you, jacki. Stephanie twentynine minutes after the hour. Back with fore fridays with fugelsang on the Stephanie Miller show. Nobody knows disasters like comedians. New york, the hightech resilient city. Just dont get us wet. What the hell was that . Thats from my upcoming benefit for victims of hurricane sandy. I booked the strongest, smartest comics i could find. My comedian friends and i will raise money to rebuild homes and lives one laugh at a time. Awe damn, the lights are out you know what . Ill watch a Little Television until they come back on. Only on current tv. Before the sneeze, help protect with a spray. Before the tissue, help defend with a wipe. Before the cold flu season help prevent with lysol. Because when you have 10 times more protection with each hand wash. And kill 99. 9 of germs around the house with each spray. Those Healthy Habits start to add up. This season, a good offense is the best defense and lysol has your family covered because thats our mission for health. Announcer Stephanie Miller. I dressed up to santa claus and left a present in her chimney. Oh. Stephanie oh my. That wasnt me. I never said that. Stephanie i did, though. Okay. Thirtyfour minutes after the hour. Stephanie all right, John Fugelsang, those tickets almost gone for washington, d. C. January 19th. Sexy liberal palooza. It is everybody, jim, chris, and jacki are opening for us. And then you hal, aisha and me and then two huge celebrity guests on panel wonderful. [ applause ] stephanie hopefully a view master by next year. Stephanie i dont think what that is. You dont remember view master . What kind of sheltered childhood did you have . Stephanie you guys have such barely concealed contempt for me. What do you mean barely concealed. Oh, my god that go to a lot of work to conceal it. Stephanie susan rice yesterday talking about withdrawing our candidacy. I have done sunday shows many times in the past. Secretary clinton had been asked by most of the networks to go on. She had had an incredibly gruelling week dealing with the protests around the middle east and africa. She had to deal with the loss of our four colleagues in benghazi and she declined to do it and i was asked by the white house if i would do it as the next senior american diplomat. Stephanie wow, no good deed goes unpunished. She dodged a bullet. Stephanie why. She never would have been confirmed. This is so winwin for the obama administration. Stephanie somebody was saying they said they always feel like it is best to have the secretary of state not come from the president s inner circle. Im ready for someone who thought that was a bad idea. She is terrific. And i will always defending her stephanie she is just a human trophy to the likes of john mccain. She is a scalp for irrelevant men to try to seem relevant again. Her investments in the pipeline would have guaranteed her not getting nominated. Stephanie susan rice again yesterday. It was a brood spectrum of Foreign Policy and National Security issues that i talk about publicly every day. I was asked. I was willing to do so. It wasnt what i had planned for that weekend originally. But i dont regret doing that, brian. I think when you are a diplomat and a tragedy happens, its our obligation to try to explain as best we can to the American People. And thats what i did. Stephanie where they really went over the top was calling in not bright and incompetent and even calling her a liar. Theres a great piece in the daily beast today that her failing is that she has always been loyal to authority. But in this case how is she supposed to have questioned the cia . 9 11, 2012 four dead and we have to smear the president. These republicans are disgusting, and they are fake pate reanothers. I do feel bad for susan rice. Wow, men the evil of these horrible men. Stephanie one more time susan rice yesterday. I would have been very honested to serve in that job, but yes, sure how can you not want to in my field serve at the highest possible level. Stephanie they were saying john, that she may become National Security advisor if the current i forget his name steps down. [ world news tonight theme ] stephanie more importantly what does Grover Norquist think . Obama may decide to blow up countries for fun i hear the first lady said she was really good at scrabble so it is scrabble or blowing up small countries . Stephanie a lot of republicans are distancing themselves from him. On tuesday he sought to stymy the president s agenda so much i thought his was a nonpartisan tax Something Group well actually make those spending restraints restraints obama will be on a very short leash. He is not going to have any fun at all, he may decide to go blow up small countries, because he cant spend the kind of money he was hoping to. You are an idiot stephanie all right. [ world news tonight theme ] he is hung up on things of a very small size though. [ laughter ] Stephanie Mitch mcconnell is accusing a pollster of skewing his Approval Ratings. Someone skewed by Approval Ratings and took away my lettuce for my terrain um. Stephanie a scant 37 approved of mitch mcconnell. What is the pollstered agenda. Stephanie by the way ppp, the pollster were the third most accurate in the president ial election. Lets be fair, it is the most liberal polling outfit out there. But no one likes mitch mcconnell. Stephanie exactly. And thats what im saying even though they are considered liberal, they are the thirdmost accurate uhhuh. And he was in rocky, playing cuff and link [ world news tonight theme ] stephanie republicans claim that pollsters have run out of republican where are all of these white people . Stephanie republicans need to dramatically improve their standings with latino voters. Republicans have run out of persuadable white voters he said. They survived latinos in four stays, and concluded that the gop was on life support. I think the key word was persuadable white voters. Stephanie yeah running out of dopey white people. Okay. Whatever you say. Which way did he go . Stephanie kelly in west virginia. Chris its for you. Good morning, kelly. Caller hi, chris, how are you . Im doing good. How are you . Caller well, im a little bothered, as stephanie said your mouth disparaged my state. I cant help it. Im from virginia. Its a thing. Caller well it might be a thing for you, but its another thing for my group of progressive west virginiians that i have worked very hard to get to watch this show. Im sorry, kelly. Caller my phone blew up, all of my ladies from every church i work with, called me because we had our little prayer meeting where we go to each others house every week and knit and crochet prayer shalls stephanie oh, my god. That is so waiting for guffman. Caller and when it was at my house, we were watching your show, and you were disparaging chris for disparaging the show i apologize kelly. I have been to west virginia. Its lovely in places. Stephanie there you go again. Bob in ohio [ overlapping speakers ] we got to second chris toen a unregulated coal mine for that. [ laughter ] Stephanie Bob in ohio. Caller hi, steph. Love your show. Stephanie thank ya. Caller i was calling about the fiscal cliff and the republicans claiming that obama wont come to the table with any spending cuts, you know, for the entitlement programs, but if you remember back during the election, they kept accusing him of cutting 716 billion from medicare. Uhhuh. Stephanie yeah so where is that number now . Here is the thing. Our buddy wrote this great piece about why are we negotiating with them, they dont care about deficits. They only care when democrats are in office. When its them, the mkt they get in office they run up deficits. Yeah. We got ourselves surplus means you are paying too much tax. Im going to take care of that. [ mocking laughter ] stephanie i miss that giggle. Fortyfive minutes after the hour. Back with the remaining moments of the Stephanie Miller show. Its like a mensa meeting with fart jokes. Its the Stephanie Miller show. Im a slutty bob hope. The troops love me. The sweatshirt is nice and all but i could use a golden lasso. The chill of peppermint. The rich dark chocolate. York peppermint pattie get the sensation. Wow ive never seen anything like this. When disaster strikes sometimes the only way out is to look within. Current tv digs deep into the extraordinary tales of heroism determination and escape. Trapped experience the drama. Back to back to back. Hold on mates catch the trapped minimarathon saturday starting at 1 eastern. On current tv. I i announcer Stephanie Miller. You make me feel like dancing, i feel like dancing, whoo, dancing, ahhhhh i love disco. And i here its making a comeback. Stephanie oh, for gods sake. Why dont you beat jim to a hitler reference now. You cannot mauk the disco stephanie 1800steph12 the phone number toll free from anywhere. Don in pennsylvania. Good morning, don. Welcome. Caller question stephanie good morning to you too. Caller well, good morning to you too. Is it possible to criticize a woman or a minority without being a racist or a misogynist. Absolutely. Yes. Its encouraged. Caller are there any liberal democratic progressive women or minorities that would fit into that category of being easily criticized . On what topic i already criticized susan rice stephanie i criticized Hillary Clinton a lot during the campaign. Because i didnt like the way their campaign was being run against president obama. I didnt like the way she worked in the senate. I thought she was the best republican we had. Caller and what about minorities . Why are you playing dumb with this. This is so lame who has called you a racist friend . Caller people have called me a racist because why . What did you say that made them call you a racist friend . Caller my nonsupport of president obama. And who called you a racist for that . Caller well just different people that i have spoken with. Oh, you have got to be a racist. You dont want to elect him because he is a black man. Stephanie thats incorrect. I have never criticized anybody that has criticized president obama in some sort of racial terms stephanie calls me and chris and jim racial terms, but other than that stephanie right. Caller has it gotten ridiculous to the point where you say chicago or urban, it is racist. Stephanie there are dog whistles you know what that means. And its context. Come on dont play dumb. There are people who will say racist for no reason. We have to calm the hysteria am i right . Caller calming hysteria are will a good thing. Stephanie you know how im going to calm yours, im going to give you 100 for proflowers gift how about that . Caller my wife would like that. Stephanie there you go. [ applause ] nonracist sexist flowers. Here i am calming racist hysteria left and right. Jacki schechner stand up work it for momma. [ romantic music ] you are being sexist we just got done [ laughter ] oh, my god Stephanie Jim and i are pigs. Everybody knows that. We just got done having a discussion about how nonsessionist we are stephanie Jacki Schechner is hot. David in rochester, hello. Caller hello. Yeah im here. Stephanie okay. Caller i have been hearing about how it is that 40 of the taxes that are paid in this country are paid by the wealthiest 2 [ overlapping speakers ] and they control 80 of the wealth. But go on. Caller that was going to be my next point. Why dont they pay 80 of the taxes. Exactly. I would say the top 20 of the population could pay 98 of the taxes. But i went to public school. My math is not that good. Stephanie hi jenny you are on the Stephanie Miller show. Okay. Byebye. I think its for jacki jacki its for you. Go ahead. Caller hi, steph, my daughter and i just loved you with the sexy liberal. We were at the meet and grope too. My daughter she was a little tiny thing with a tshirt that said aspiring radio slag. Stephanie i loved that shirt. Caller when obamacare takes effect and employers have to offer health care. Do they also have to require to pay a certain percent of the premiums for like an employee and his family too . Thats a good question. I would have to look. Im not entirely sure if theres a mandate on how much they have to pay. I know they have to offer an affordable option which means it cant be more than 9. 45 of your income. So basically they have to offer you something where you are personally not paying anymore than 9. 5 of your income. Caller okay. Keep in mind though most employers at this point offer Health Insurance already. So were not kicking in a program that doesnt already exist. And thats very important to remember is were not having any sort of Health Care Overhaul where were now mandating employers to do something they already do. My husband has been weighing a job offer, where its an expensive plan, and theyll pay 100 of his premium. But its like 1,200 a month times times 12. For you guys. Caller yeah, they wont pay any of the premiums for us. It may be more affordable for you to use the state insurance exchanges and try to buy on the private market competitively. You would have to weigh that. Stephanie okay. All right. How many awesome jacki health care corners have we had this morning . How awesome is Jacki Schechner. Its like a Health Care Crisis call center. I know she gets up in the night and burns the [ inaudible ] the only one that got it right was Jacki Schechner so happy with schechner oh i feel loved. Stephanie you are loved speaking of beloved, oh know another palin divorce. Yeah well he gave it a year. Stephanie track has filed for divorce from his wife after almost 19 full months. The two by the way their marriage took place when she was already six monks pregnant. [ applause ] thats a palin family tradition. Family values. [ laughter ] she was already pregnant [ mocking laughter ] stephanie do you want to do elmer fud calling the palin kids in. All right. Joy behar comics with benefits tonight at 9 00 pm on the current tv network. Please watch it. Larry david is on it. Its awesome. Stephanie all of us on january 19th for sexy liberal inauguration weekend. Tickets almost gone. Jacki schechner we love you, honey. I love you guys. Stephanie lets go spin we have gotten fat this whole show lets go. Bye john. Stephanie bye baby