Hi, it’s me again. Bryan Mackenzie is taking a hiatus from Opponent Watch (hey should we change the title, by the way? It sounds so self-incriminating these days), so I volunteered for backup duty. Bryan, I gotta say, I really love what you’ve done with this piece. I apologize for all the gimmicky prompts you’ve faithfully preserved all these years (“Michigan can sleep soundly about” just screams undeveloped prefrontal cortex), so please feel free to change them when you return. I do hope you return. You’re the Blake Corum of college football humor. Anyhow, it’s been a hot second since the last time I posted something here, hasn’t it? I’m doing great, if you were wondering. After writing for mgoblog, I decided to become a urologist. I moved to the west coast for residency, and now I’m in my last year of fellowship training. My passionate disdain of rocks and rock-like objects led me to pursue a career in endourology, which is a fancy way of saying I remove kidney stones for a living. So in that spirit, we’re doing kidney stone analogies today. About last week: Ten years ago I was in East Lansing for the -48 yards rushing game. After the game Ace Anbender and I happened upon a bottle of Buffalo Trace in my trunk and played a game of “what is the saddest song you can think of” as State fans paraded around us. It started out funny and ironic, but eventually it just became sad. We settled on the Jeff Buckley version of “Hallellujah.” Chantel Jennings found us in an emptied parking lot about an hour later and drove us home. I wasn’t in East Lansing last weekend, but I like to think that somewhere in that parking lot there was a Michigan State fan listening to Jeff Buckley and singing along to a cold and broken Hallelujah. [After THE JUMP: Diagnoses]