The point is, kids love a snow day. Now, before we go, jack, could you tell us if this cold is going to let up any time soon . laughter ill take that as a no. Announcer its the late show with Stephen Colbert tonight, freezing temps, hot tweets plus, stephen welcomes Anderson Cooper. Maz jobrani. And musical guest margo price. Featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert band playing cheers and applause stephen how are you . Hey, everybody wooo wooo cheers and applause wooo oh, youve got to love it thank you so much. Please, have a seat. Youre too kind. Thank you very much. How lovely. cheers and applause piano riff please, got to love it. Every january every january they ship in fresh audiences for us and thats so wonderful. Welcome to the late show, everybody. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. cheers and applause piano riff thank you very much. Its our first, first show of 2018. Happy new years, everybody. cheers and applause jon yeah, happy new year stephen happy new year. Its going to be a good one. I love new years. Its one of my favorite holidays that involves getting together with friends and screaming at a clock. laughter so far, so far, my resolution is to stay inside until june. cheers because it is cold. And i want to salute all the brave audience members these heroes. cheers and applause are you okay . piano riff these heroes, they did it they stood in freezing temperatures just to get in here tonight, and tonight we salute them and we remember their friends they had to eat to survive. laughter jon oh, my goodness. Oh, snap. Stephen but, brutal cold is tormenting the u. S. , folks. And reports say, the worst is yet to come. The worst is yet to come, by the way, was also the theme of my new years eve party. laughter the National Weather service has warned that were in a prolonged period of muchbelownormal temperatures. For my younger viewers, thats what we used to call winter. laughter prolonged low temperatures apparently thats news now. Plus, times square had the secondcoldest new years eve celebration on record. Its true. The ball did not drop so much as shrivel up and rise back into 2017. laughter and applause its just where are come on down jon oh oh, my goodness. Stephen come on down applause piano riff a fine family joke. And, its not just new york. There are winter storm warnings as far south as florida, and right now, it feels colder in parts of canada than on mars. audience reacts still no evidence of life in canada. laughter speaking of new lows donald trump. laughter cheers and applause they were wondering, they were wondering. They were wondering when i was going to get there. laughter donald trump tweeted, in the east, it could be the coldest new years eve on record. Perhaps we could use a bit of that good old Global Warming that our country, but no other country, was going to pay trillions of dollars to protect against. Bundle up laughter you see the logic here because Donald Trumps cold right now, thats evidence that the earth is not getting warmer. Just like, because donald trump is president right now, thats evidence weve never had a competent president. cheers and applause and theres no evidence. piano riff its only whats happening now the church of whats happening now. Jon the church of whats happening now. Stephen thats right. And this morning, trump went on a tear, tweeting nine times . Nine times. Including this one, crooked Hillary Clintons top aid, huma abedin, has been accused of disregarding basic security protocols. She put classified passwords into the hands of foreign agents. Remember sailors pictures on submarine . Jail deep state Justice Department must finally act . Also on comey and others. laughter remember sailors pictures on submarine . laughter i think grandpas reminiscing again. I remember, i remember when licorice came in a little pouch with a blue stamp on it, and nickels cost a dime. All right . Jail. laughter but i just want to take a moment here to point out that this is the president of the United States tweeting, and in his tweet, he described the Justice Department as a deepstate entity, because it is so corrupt, it is unwilling to throw his political opponents in jail. That is a serious charge, the kind of thing you could never, ever make lightly. And, of course, you could never take back. Im kidding. laughter today, the white house insists donald trump does not think d. O. J. Is deep state despite tweeting otherwise. laughter yes, Sarah Huckabee sanders said that this afternoon. Who got to her . Could it be. The deep state . laughter cheers and applause could it . Could it . Jon who could it be . piano riff stephen nah, he was just talking out of his butt. laughter then, trump took credit for something he had absolutely nothing to do with. Since taking office, i have been very strict on commercial aviation. Good news, it was just reported that there were zero deaths in 2017, the best and safest year on record laughter trump took credit for no one dying in a plane crash this year. That explains his new Campaign Slogan, trump 2020 you got to tulsa, didnt ya . laughter what do you want . Trump also cheers and applause yeah, tulsa tulsa hell yeah trump also took aim at his favorite punching bag, the free press, tweeting, the failing New York Times has a new publisher, a. G. Sulzberger. Congratulations here is a last chance for the times to fulfill the vision of its founder, adolph ochs. So that makes two adolphs hes pulling for. And laughter jon wooo wooo stephen and jon wooo applause stephen happy new year fresh start it continues to give the news impartially, without fear or favor, regardless of party, sect, or interests involved. Get dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot impartial journalists of a much higher standard, lose all of your phony and non existent sources, and treat the president of the United States fairly, so that the next time i and the people win, you wont have to write an apology to your readers for a job poorly done gluh laughter now applause i havent done that in a while. Thats a tough impression on the throat. Ive got to toughen up. Now, hes probably saying, good luck, as in, its 2018, and donald trump is still the president. Gluh laughter on the international front, merely while on the front internationale, the year started off big for north korean dictator kim jongun. He gave a speech yesterday, and for the new year, he got a sharp new suit and had his head re rectangled. laughter very, very nice. Yes. Could we go back to that, jimmy . Why first of all cheers and applause yeah. His barber uses a compass and a protractor. laughter but why are there seven microphones in front of him . Is that one for every television in north korea . Once he got through his obligatory ive got nukes, death to america, meow, meow, meow, un actually had some good news. In what is seen as an offering of an olive branch, he plans to send a delegation to the Winter Olympics in south korea. There are even rumors that north korea has been pumping their olympic team with performance enhancing food. laughter so, there is some hope for better relations between north and south korea. A lot of people deserve credit for that, but one person is taking all of it, because this morning, the president tweeted, sanctions and other pressures are beginning to have a big impact on north korea. Soldiers are dangerously fleeing to south korea. Rocket man now wants to talk to south korea for first time. Perhaps that is good news, perhaps not we will see laughter we will see . Thats a little nonchalant. Maybe itll lead to peace. Maybe itll lead to thermonuclear war. laughter no way of knowing. I, as the president , would do something about it, but im too busy keeping all the planes in the sky. applause thats right. Delta 35niner, you are clear delta 35niner, you are clear to land. laughter piano riff you know what else hes busy with . Hes designed this new president ial challenge coin. Now, for those of you who dont know what a challenge coin is, ive got one right here, okay . Theyre like these medallions that the military put their unit insignias on and they slip it into someones hand with a handshake. Its similar to how you would pass a tip to a maitre d, or buy a dime bag, or give your maitre d a dime bag, you know. laughter ive received several coins myself. It is a great honor and a wonderful american tradition. So, naturally, trump is ruining it. Lets take a look at Barack Obamas president ial challenge coin. Its copper colored with the president ial seal on one side and on the other side, the white house, obamas name and signature. It was a simpler time. Well, no surprise, trumps coin is gold. And at the top of it, it says, donald j. Trump. Then theres his signature in the middle. And theyve also added his name again at the bottom, in a banner, in case you forgot his name midcoin. laughter plus, trump has flipped the direction of the eagle and replaced the nations motto, e pluribus unum, with make America Great again. Audience ooooh booing stephen yes, yes oh, come on i guess replacing the National Motto with his Campaign Slogan is kind of tacky. It beat the first choice good for one free drink. laughter sounds classier in latin. Now, not satisfied with making it gold and putting his name all over it, he also had to make it thicker. You know what they say about a man with a thick coin very small penis. laughter cheers and applause i dont know if thats true. I dont know if thats true. I dont actually know if thats true. Were going to fact check that. I dont know if thats true. laughter and its not just honoring trump honoring trump. Over the break, the donald trump animatronic robot was unveiled at disneys hall of president s. Lets take a look. Gah laughter gleh gleh jim jim, i said put up a picture of trumps robot, not jon voight after a chemical spill. laughter well, that is truly disturbing. I know one sculptor who did not vote for him. laughter well, cbs late show has obtained exclusive footage of the trump robot in action, and evidently, it is not getting along with its fellow president s. George washington, he will go down as one of the worst president s in the history of our country. Thomas jefferson, one of the great sleaze bags of our time. Honest abe lincoln, hes such a liar. A big, fat, ugly mess. God bless the united shtates. laughter cheers and applause stephen weve got a great show for you tonight. Anderson cooper is here. But when we come back, marijuana stick around. cheers and applause band playing youre paul oh yeah. Im the new sprintern oh, sprint plus. Intern. Clever, right . I was just. Looking at getting an amazing iphone 8 . They have an all glass design, advanced cameras, a11 bionic chip. Uh. Im going to. Yeah, now youre going to give your second phone to your new friend. 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I dont think anyone had a better new years eve than cnn reporter and woman hearing for the first time that her child bit someone, randi kaye. laughter cnn gave randi kaye a tough assignment covering how a bus full of stoners in colorado celebrate new years. Spoiler alert they do it by smoking weed. laughter randi, where are you . laughs we are in, ah, denver, colorado. Good evening to you guys, anderson and andy. We have the Party Started here. Theres a little bit of a purple haze. We call this magic bus the cannabus, get it . Whoa this is what im dealing with were at a dispensary called the medicine man. See, this is mike. You got a little high, didnt you . I think i got a little high. Mike, im trying to remember where we are. Where am i . Stephen believe it or not, cnn. laughter and she didnt stop there, because randi kaye grabbed a randi j. Oh, my god. Randis dose is kicking in. This is for andy andy, this is for you stephen andy, andy, this is for you come on, itll get you so high youll think you can pass a joint through a tv camera laughter andy, no . How about you, Anderson Cooper . Want a little Anderson Cooper 420 . laughter but the pot party wasnt just happening on the cnn, because as of yesterday, recreational pot is officially legal in california. cheers and applause thats right that is right californians can finally try marijuana. laughter think you guys might like it. To all of our freshly baked california viewers, i just want to say, thanks for switching over from the Monterey Bay Aquarium livestream of jellyfish. I will do my best to move hypnotically. laughter cheers and applause jon laughs piano riff stephen it was a big deal out there. At one california dispensary, 200 people waited in line before dawn for the 6 00 a. M. Start of sales. Weve come so far from people standing on street corners looking for drugs. laughter . To people standing on street corners waiting for drugs. laughter and i know one guy from california whos going to be particularly happy about this stoney von dankington, everybody say hi to stoney cheers and applause happy new year, everybody Stephen Stoney, stoney, youve got to be excited, right . Oh, hell yeah january 1, 2018 will live forever as a special day in cali history. Stephen the day the day that weed was finally legalized . Yeah, i guess, but i was talking about the states new salaryhistory inquiry ban now bosses cant ask you what you made at your last job, and thats hella progressive legislation, dude. laughter stephen okay, but, what about the lifting of the ban on Recreational Marijuana . Oh, yeah. I can tell you, californians are pretty stoked. I was just back home for new years, visiting some kind buds. laughter stephen you mean pot, right . Nah, stephen, im talking bout my parents. Theyre some of the kindest people i know. And, honestly, parents are like your best buds for life. laughter Stephen Stoney, we talked about this earlier. You were supposed to come on here and talk about your excitement about Recreational Marijuana. Oh, right, right sorry, man. Im just so high right now. laughter and applause Stephen Stoney von dankington, everybody well be right back with Anderson Cooper. Please join us. cheers and applause band playing emerge restored. Fortified. Replenished. Emerge everyday with emergenc packed with b vitamins, antioxidants, electrolytes plus more vitamin c than 10 oranges. Why not feel this good everyday . Emerge and see. Tmobile keeps your family connected with new iphones. Which is great. Unless your parents thought you were studying. Somebodys busted. Join tmobile, buy an iphone 8, get an iphone 8 on us. And now, bring your family to tmobile and get a 4th line free. Ahh. The new guy. Whoa, he looks he looks exactly like me. No. Separated at birth much . 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Together, were building a better california. band playing cheers and applause stephen hey, everybody, welcome back hey, ladies and gentlemen, my first guest tonight is an emmywinning journalist who just hosted cnns new years eve broadcast. Please welcome Anderson Cooper. cheers and applause band playing stephen ive got to say, we have a lot of people on the show, and not a lot of newsmen get standing ovations. Well, theres not a lot of us left. cheering and laughter stephen good to know. Good to know. Happy new year. Stephen happy new year to you. Did you have a new years resolution . A new years resolution i wanted to, but, you know, mine are so lame. Stephen thats what you said to andy. I watched, you wouldnt tell your resolutions to andy, either. I always resolve to, like work out more. Stephen thats lame i know its lame. But, actually, ill tell you, i did an interview with the rock a couple months ago. When he walked in, i said, oh, man, you let yourself go. And he was like, what . I said, im kidding, im kidding. laughter and hes a lovely guy really smart, really sweet guy and anyway, he started asking me where i work out, because he doesnt like his gym in new york. And i was like, you actually might actually like my gym. Its, like, underground, theres no windows, like, the equipment is old, its just, like, serious lifters, and me. laughter and so hes now using my gym whenever he comes to new york. So my gym cred has skyrocketed, because people at my gym know that i got the rock to come to the gym. cheers and applause stephen wow listen, you know im a fan of yours and im not taking anything away from Anderson Cooper when i say, if the rock is there, isnt it really his gym . Yes it is laughs stephen arent you going to the rocks gym now . That is absolutely true, yes. Stephen i watched you and andy. I really enjoyed it. Thank you. Stephen the only criticism i would have is that you cut away to anyone else. We want to see the two of you the two of us, yes stephen suffer in the cold. laughter well, it was funny, because in the runup, andy kept, like, having these appointments to get warm jackets tailored. I was like, you dont need a tailored coat, you need massive layers and parkas. So, i knew he was going to really die out there. So i bought like, on thursday, i called up this store called the warming store in philadelphia i found on the internet, and i bought one audience member clapping what, you work at the warming store one person . laughter stephen yeah, theyre the sponsor. Theyre the sponsor tonight. Exactly, the warming store i talked to. So, i spent 2,900 buying electric clothing. I didnt know that they had electricallyheated clothing now. Stephen wait theres a battery pack . Theres a battery pack on your socks, a battery pack on a vest, on long underwear, on your hat, on your gloves. And they sold me the ferrari of warming gloves, they said. laughter so yeah, it was kind of amazing. Stephen so you werent wearing a coat, you were wearing an environment. Yes i mean, i had coats over it, but, like, every now and then, you could, like, press a button and your pecs would get really hot. laughter yeah. Stephen you know who can do that . The rock. Stephen the rock. He doesnt need the clothing. He just does that automatically. Stephen now, listen, are you still is this mine . Stephen yeah, sure, why not. Lets find out. Do you still have a contact high from randi kaye . So, okay, randi kaye stephen you guys have gotten a little teasing, not just me. Yes, a lot of teasing. Okay, first of all, its legal in colorado. She was just stephen no one said it wasnt. We are grown adults. And she did not smoke, obviously, she was just in the environment. Stephen secondhand. Whatever. laughter stephen secondhand. She ended up at a, like, a paint party, where i guess this pot bus ultimately ended up at a paint party, where for some reason, i dont know, i guess people who have been riding around getting stoned all night want to end up painting in, like, dayglo colors. Stephen look at you talking like you dont know what its like to be high. I dont know. I have no idea. Stephen i have no idea. I wouldnt know. Ive read about it. So, yeah, they ended up at a paint party. Stephen okay, sure. They buried the lead. Yeah, i know. The whole thing surprised me as much as anybody else, ive got to tell you. laughter stephen and now, california, its legal. I know. Stephen are you surprised it spread it spread so quickly . Not really. In california, it makes sense. Its california. laughter stephen i dont know. I dont know that scene. Sure, yeah, yeah. Stephen i dont really know. I mean, if it was, like, south carolina, i would be surprised. Stephen i think it might be medicinal. I think medicinal might be legal down there. Really . Stephen because i got some glaucoma coming on hard. laughter on vacation just for the christmas vacation. Did you now, you had to work on new years eve. Were you allowed to go have fun . Yeah, i took, like, a couple of days off and i went to france for the holidays. My partners french. applause its weird, though. Like, so we were out in the, like, french countryside in his house with his sister and all these kids and all these french people. And its weird when youre in france, because they do this thing that nobody else does, and they dont know theyre doing it. They do this thing where they go, woo. And so, and they have entire conversations so, like, i said, anyone seen star wars . And the father at the table went woo. And then, like, the kids were like, woo. Its all, like, variations of woo. So then, i tried stephen is there a b in there . Its like, boof. laughter stephen how would you spell that . Boof. I dont know. laughter and, so then, i tried it, just as a joke. I was like, woo, and they all looked at me like, oh, my god. What are you doing . Thats so weird. laughter and they dont know theyre doing it. Its very strange. Stephen and what does it mean . And they all eat smelly cheese. Like, the smellier the better. Its very strange. Stephen uhhuh. Yeah. Stephen uhhuh. Yeah, i dont know. Stephen what does it mean, the woo . Its like, eh. Its like, eh. Did you Like Star Wars . Eh. Instead of eh, its woo. laughter stephen by the way, have you seen the new star wars . Boof. I actually saw it last night. Stephen did you . I walked out. Audience member what . I know, i know. Im sorry, im sorry. Stephen you walked out . I got a lot going on. I have a lot of work to do stephen so it wasnt a protest. No, it wasnt a protest. Im going to go see it again, i just, i had too much in my head, i wanted to enjoy it. Stephen so wait a second. So you went, you paid money . I went down to see it at the theater on 23rd street, yeah. Stephen you paid money, you walked in, and it occurred to you in the middle of the movie, i dont have time for this. laughter yeah, about 45 minutes in, yeah, yeah. applause i was like, im not giving this the attention it deserves. Stephen which is really a compliment. Yeah, no, i was like, this deserves my attention. Im not giving it my attention. Stephen its like if youre making love to someone. In the middle of it, you go, you know what, im not giving this my all. cheers i should come back. Lets put a pin in this. Lets table this for a moment, so i can get full focus. laughter yeah. I did see i, tonya. Have you seen . Stephen i have not seen i, tonya. Oh, its so good stephen but im a huge Jeff Gillooly fan. laughter that joke will be great some day. Allison janney was so good in this movie. Stephen shes always good, shes always good in that. Lets talk about actual news going on out there. Okay. Stephen i have unplugged a little bit, for the last two weeks. Apparently, from what i saw. Stephen i dont know what the hell is going on. You caught up on the tweets, though. Stephen i was very well, its easy. Its a shorthand. Its like the sparknotes of democracy, just reading his tweets. laughter yeah, sad. Stephen so sad. Iran, 2009, this also happened. Right, the green revolution. Stephen green revolution. It didnt go anywhere, it was crushed at the time. Right. Stephen is this different in any way, do you think . I mean, right now, it hasnt taken the size of that. This started just a couple of days ago. It started, actually, outside tehran. And it started, actually, more as an economic protest, because theres the president of iran, this guy, rouhani, whos considered more moderate, hes promised reforms and promised, sort of, a better economy. Theres really high like, doubledigit unemployment in iran, doubledigit inflation. And he hasnt really followed through, as the way many people would have liked. The real power there is the Supreme Leader, khamenei. Its a very confusing system. And so, so, people started protesting more over economic stuff, and it has grown more into tehran and its more people are talking about freedom and greater liberties. Theres a whole young population there that really wants you know they want more freedom. They want what they see on television and on, you know, via satellite. Stephen one of the hallmarks of the green revolution going on in 2009 was the use of twitter. Right, yeah. Stephen thats all been shut down. Yeah, all that stuff. Yeah, most dictators will shut down twitter. Theyll shut down social media. Mubarak did it in the waning days of his regime. I dont know iran very well. I was only there once. I was a young reporter in, like, 93, 94. I was there with two producers for this thing called channel 1. And, on my first day, one of my producers was like, oh, we should just go to the park. We dont need to go with our minder, well just go. Well leave the hotel, go to the park, and shoot some video. And so we did. We were shooting, like, people like, girls playing badminton or something nothing offensive. And we got arrested. So, i was in iran for four days, i was arrested for three of them. So, i really have not seen much of the country. Stephen what, were you detained for three days . Oh, they would let me, they would let us go back to the hotel at night, because they knew we were, like ,trapped here anyway. Theres nowhere to go. They took our passports. But when youre arrested in iran, i mean, it is very scary, because theres no one to call, theres no embassy. And, you know, i was working for channel 1, which, at the time, they didnt really have much international reach. And every day, i would sit in a Police Station in front of a giant picture of the ayatollah khamenei, whos really the last person you want to be looking at when youre arrested and dont know what your future holds. Its just not a very warming feeling. Stephen now, this is an election year, 2018. Theres a lot of excitement about what might happen in the midterms. As a journalist, looking back at 2016, is there Something Different you think that the news media should do in 2018 . Because you all got a fair amount of criticism for your coverage of trump and well, look, i mean, theres so much information now. You know, people used to talk about a 24hour news cycle and thats i mean, theres not even its not 24hours. It seems like its hourly. You know, the whole broadcast that we planned for, you know i have a broadcast that starts at 8 00, were planning for it all day. A lot of times, everything we worked on, all day, gets thrown out at five minutes to 8 00, and we do a completely different broadcast. So, you know, i do think its important to just try to avoid always being distracted by, like, the latest thing, the shiniest object, and keep focus on issues which are important. But, you know, its hard. I mean, things are changing incredibly rapidly. Stephen well, good luck with that. I always enjoy your broadcast. I watch it every night. Thank you so much for being here. Thanks very much, i appreciate it. cheers and applause stephen Anderson Cooper 360 airs weeknights on cnn. And thats him. Well be right back with maz jobrani. Stick around. cheers and applause band playing tto find your balance s everything you need plus an extra 20 off eat healthier with an air fryer get moving with new active apparel. And sleep well with cuddl duds. Youll get kohls cash too and yes2you members earn triple points kohls. Feel the power of thenew power. Smax. 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Beautiful. cheers and applause jon laughs stephen everybody, my next guest tonight is a very funny comedian, whose latest netflix special is called immigrant. Please welcome back to the show, maz jobrani band playing cheers and applause ah stephen nice to see you again. Thanks for having me, man. Stephen its a pleasure, a pleasure. Of course, were fellow cbs ians. Youre on superior donuts, as well, besides your netflix special. How you doing over there . Im doing great over there. The show is going great. Weve got season two were in the middle of season two. Stephen im not surprised. It is one of my favorite pastry based sitcoms. Audience member woo its funny, because im iranianamerican, im middle eastern american audience members woo oh, i got some in the audience yeah, my people so, when people ask me how was it working with judd hirsch and katey sagal and all these people, and i go, you know, as a middle eastern american, im used to not lasting to season two. I get killed in season one. laughter most shows ive done like, i did 24, i died. So. Stephen this is nice, a change of pace season two im excited, man laughter stephen can i this is unusual, i havent asked a guest this before. May i pet your sweater . Oh, go, please, pet. Stephen thats a nice this is a thirsty cardigan, isnt it . Isnt it beautiful . Stephen you know, you have to be a man of a certain age to really rock a cardigan. Yes, well, you know, i that girl laughed at that. laughter what are you thinking are you saying im old . No, ill tell you, im 45. And i got so excited about this sweater, i realized think about it. Because after 21, theres nothing to look forward to. laughter 21, you drink, youre like wooo stephen thats the milestone, yeah. They should make other things illegal, so that we can get excited about them. I mean, they are illegal, but to a certain age. 30, its like, cocaine, wooo you know . laughter i dont even do cocaine, but it would be like, yeah, cocaine 40, heroin, 50, viagra i could use that. laughter stephen and cardigans should be illegal until 45 . 45 no, stephen, i ran into some, like, 22yearolds and theyre like, were going to vegas, bro. I was like, bro, this is my vegas. laughter stephen careful, thats a gateway cloth, right there, youre wearing. And look, it comes with a pocket to rest my 45yearold hands in, just like that. Stephen oh, yeah. Yeah, maybe a pipe. A little pipe is next, right . Im telling you, bro, this is a nice cardigan. laughter stephen i never i, i, i immediately petted it. You did pet it stephen yes. Yes. Stephen i just had Anderson Cooper out here. Did you watch the interview . I saw the interview. Stephen so, do you still have family in iran . I have some cousins in iran, and a lot of them some distant cousins, and i have been watching what is going on as well, and its been crazy. First of all, let me just say i want to preface this by saying, im not an expert on iran. Because i just want to say that. Stephen you were born there, though. I was born in iran. But im not an expert on it. Okay, and the reason i say that is because the last time i was here, we talked about iranian new year, a persian new year, and a lot of iranians, like, attacked me. You got it wrong, man i was like, well, im not a historian, im just a comedian laughter so, in this case, like, i just want to say, first of all, i want to say i support the protesters. I mean, its crazy whats going on. cheers and applause there you go, okay. cheers and applause you wait. You wait on twitter, you misrepresented the protests laughter but, its an interesting thing thats going on, because a lot of people dont know whats happening. Its happening so fast, and its different from, like you said, the 2009 protest. Stephen its hard to communicate because social media is shut down. Social media is shut down. And one of the things thats interesting is, you know, theres a debate should trump talk about it . Should he not talk about it . And i said, you know, he should talk to other people before he talks about it. laughter you know what im saying . cheers and applause ill tell you why. I have three reasons why im a little wary of trump talking about iran. Number one is i dont like him. cheers and applause thats just who i am. I know i number two is that he hasnt been a friend to the iranian people, as you know, the travel ban. He banned iranians from coming to america. Iran has been a part travel ban. And number three is, this is a very nuanced situation, and i dont know if youve noticed, but trump is not very nuanced. laughter no, because what it is, is its good to acknowledge and support the protesters, but i think if he goes too aggressive with the support in the wrong way, then the islamic republic, the regime, thats a repressive regime, will turn around and say that this is america thats leading these protests and they will come down with an iron fist. Which, the Supreme Leader has already said theres external forces here, that are leading these protests. And, by the way, when i saw that, i was like, dude, you should take responsibility once in a while for having an oppressive regime, economic inequality, all that stuff. And he actually reminded me a little bit of trump, who doesnt take responsibility for himself, either. applause stephen now, speaking of the travel ban speaking of the travel ban, do you talk about that in your act . Because i know your new special is called immigrant. Does it come up . Well, its interesting, because, you know, the travel ban, as you know, they had 1. 0, then they had 2. 0, then 3. 0. Stephen just keep putting it out there. Its like an iphone update, every three months, you get a new one. laughter whats interesting, and i know you took notice of this, too. In travel ban one and two, the criticism had been that it was a muslim ban, because all the countries had been muslim countries. So, in an effort to show that theyre not antimuslim, the administration added three new countries to travel ban 3. 0. They added north korea, which, i didnt know they were coming, but now they really cant come. laughter ive never met a north korean, have you ever met a north korean . Stephen i have not, not yet. Yeah, so, i dont think theyre coming anyway. But anyway, the second group that was added were venezuelan diplomats. So, not the whole country just ten dudes from venezuela, cant come. laughter and then they added chad, which i thought was some guy. laughter i heard it, i was like, what did chad do . laughter turns out chad, as you know, is another Muslim Country in africa. But chad does not sound like a Muslim Country. Chad sounds like a Muslim Country trying to pretend not to be a Muslim Country, right . laughter theyre like, hi, we are chad. Thats mike, and thats chip. Just hanging out. laughter stephen well, happy new year. When is new year when is iranian new year . Is it the same . The persian new year happens, the first moment of spring is the persian new year. Its coming in march to a theater near you. Stephen well, you have to come back for the next new years, too. I would love to, man. Stephen thanks for being here. Thanks for having me. cheers and applause stephen good to see you. Immigrant is on netflix, and you can see maz on superior donuts right here on cbs. Maz jobrani, everybody well be right back with a performance by margo price. Stick around. cheers and applause band playing introducing the npower jean aka the perfect straight. And introducing the new relaxed slim for men. Power up with 50 off all jeans this saturday and sunday only. At old navy. To everyone else, ieveryone else. But on the inside, i feel chronic, widespread pain. Fibromyalgia may be invisible to others, but my pain is real. Fibromyalgia is thought to be caused by overactive nerves. Lyrica is believed to calm these nerves. Im glad my doctor prescribed lyrica. For some, lyrica delivers effective relief for moderate to even severe fibromyalgia pain. And improves function. Lyrica may cause serious allergic reactions, suicidal thoughts or actions. Tell your doctor right away if you have these, new or worse depression, unusual changes in mood or behavior, swelling, trouble breathing, rash, hives, blisters, muscle pain with fever, tired feeling, or blurry vision. 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Stephen here performing, a little pain from her album, all american made, please welcome margo price cheers and applause im so tired but i cant sleep too many obligations im trying to keep gotta please everybody except for myself but like levon said aint in it for my Health Everyone thinks its all work and no fun but a little pain never hurt anyone a little pain never hurt anyone when i come i home ive gotta leave my reality is only makebelieve someone said its one or the other but im breaking my back and working like a mother whos to say just how its done and a little pain never hurt anyone a little pain never hurt anyone a little pain never hurt anyone baby, slow down better hurry up quick i feel so good that its making me sick and i didnt mean to call your phone i said, i like you the best when im all alone its been real but i gotta run and a little pain never hurt anyone a little pain never hurt anyone a little pain never hurt anyone a little pain, a little pain never hurt anyone a little pain, a little pain never hurt anyone cheers and applause refresh your home and save at ross. Ross has all the home trends for kitchen, living room and bedroom for a fraction of what youd pay elsewhere. For the latest home trends, at big savings youve gotta go to ross. Ross is going all out. All outdoors that is. Youll find everything you need to make your outdoor space your favorite place. And if you want it all for a fraction of what youd pay elsewhere, you gotta go to ross. cheers and applause stephen well, thats it for the late show, everyone. Good night captioning sponsored by cbs captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org are you ready yall to have some fun feel the love tonight dont you worry where it is you come from itll be all right its the late, late show cheers and applause reggie ladies and gentlemen, all the way from werewolf, transylvania, give it up for