[applause] greg: all right. [cheers] greg: happy thursday, everybody, sometimes the universe remind you that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. like jesse watters getting the 8:00 p.m. hour after being diagnosed with micropenis. can we really say that? greg: yes. here s another example. the wildly popular comedian named shane gillis. if you ve never heard of him tonight is the case. tonight the leader of isis is killed. trump goes is dead. he died like a dog. in front of the whole world. abu, we could hear him crying, abu, don t cry. let me tell you something, abu cried, he cried quite a bit. i wouldn t have cried. cry baby baghdady, that s what we were calling him. greg: he s funny and he does track better than alec baldwin plus he hasn t shot anyone yet. but what is special about gillis is he beat cancer culture in 2019. he was hired as a cast member on saturday night live but was fired before he appeared on the show after people dug
[cheers] greg: happy thursday, everybody, sometimes the universe remind you that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. like jesse watters getting the 8:00 p.m. hour after being diagnosed with micropenis. can we really say that? greg: yes. here s another example. the wildly popular comedian named shane gillis. if you ve never heard of him tonight is the case. tonight the leader of isis is killed. trump goes is dead. he died like a dog. in front of the whole world. abu, we could hear him crying, abu, don t cry. let me tell you something, abu cried, he cried quite a bit. i wouldn t have cried. cry baby baghdady, that s what we were calling him. greg: he s funny and he does track better than alec baldwin plus he hasn t shot anyone yet. but what is special about gillis is he beat cancer culture in 2019. he was hired as a cast member on saturday night live but was fired before he appeared on the show after people dug up old jokes when he made jokes
greg: love it! yes! [cheers] greg: thank you. sit down. sit down! you girl scouts over there, sit down. all right. it s friday, so you know what that means. let s welcome tonight s guests. his favorite karaoke song is pledge of allegiance. she took her driver s test on a tractor. co-host of the bottom line. [cheers] greg: she s lean, keen and can pass for a teen. best-selling author, kat, and the statue of liberty looks up to him. former wwe world champion. all right. before we get to some new stories let s do this. greg s leftovers. it s leftovers where i read the jokes we didn t use this week. as always it s my first time reading them so if they suck we ll rojo mackey up in a carpet and toss him off the bridge. [laughter] greg: all right. here we go. harvard president claudine gay resigned after accusations of plagiarism. gay said she would have caught the errors if she had a larger pair of glasses. not surprisingly people said there was something familiar obj
greg: love it! yes! [cheers] greg: thank you. sit down. sit down! you girl scouts over there, sit down. all right. it s friday, so you know what that means. let s welcome tonight s guests. his favorite karaoke song is pledge of allegiance. she took her driver s test on a tractor. co-host of the bottom line. [cheers] greg: she s lean, keen and can pass for a teen. best-selling author, kat, and the statue of liberty looks up to him. former wwe world champion. all right. before we get to some new stories let s do this. greg s leftovers. it s leftovers where i read the jokes we didn t use this week. as always it s my first time reading them so if they suck we ll rojo mackey up in a carpet and toss him off the bridge. [laughter] greg: all right. here we go. harvard president claudine gay resigned after accusations of plagiarism. gay said she would have caught the errors if she had a larger pair of glasses. not surprisingly people said there was something familiar obj
that s right! that s right! thank you! thank you, thank you, thank you. it s always crazy when the girl scouts of america are in the audience. [laughter] happy thursday. so, are the young uns about to give the boot to the drooling old coot? he s crushing biden with voters under the age of 30, a group he won by 25 points in 2020. i know, it is early yet. then again, when you consider joe s age, i don t think anything could be too early. let s just say, when joe has a pizza delivered and the guy on the phone says it s going to be 45 minutes, he breaks into a cold sweat. because he s, like, old. really old. greg: really old. liked, jesus christ was a freshman in his senior year, old. i m talking old. greg: we ve got to go possible candidates. one of them is skin glued to a skeleton, and the other is trump. true, donald is aging like everybody else, except oddly it s backwards. he looks great. his hair is still a natural orange. and he s funnier than ever. but how is he