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Transcripts For COM The Nightly Show With Larry Wilmore 20160503

Im larry wilmore. So house of your weekend . cheers and applause mine was pretty good. I hosted a Little Dinner Party with a few friends me, don lemon, the president you know, my boys. Right . And i was wrapping up my little speech and giving the president some props, telling him how much i appreciated him being the first black president and what that meant to me. And i buttoned it with a little. Lets say, uh, colloquialism. Larry so, mr. President , if im going to keep it 100, yo barry. You did it, my nigga. You did it. Larry thank you very much cheers and applause now, there was a lot of reaction online, many people were upset about it, many people supported it. Like the president himself, the reaction was mixed. Oh, shoot. I did it again laughter im fine. Dont make those jokes, larry. Seriously, though. I completely understand why people would be upset about that its a very charged word, i get it. But there was one particu ....

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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20160503

Well, sain people. Because crazy people love trump, lets be honest. Not just the average joes, trump has also been getting support from prominent citizens people like north korean diplomat dennis rodman, douche bag ambassador kid rock, hard liquor name sake tila tequila and this very nice strongman named mike tyson. Hi, mike, i love your punching. Now tysons endorsement is hardly surprising because he and trump have been good friends for decades now. A friendship that even survived tysons rape conviction. One of the leaders of the effort to keep tyson out of prison is donald trump, the casino own wore could lose millions if tyson is unable to fight at his resort. I heard about a girl that late in the evening knocked on his door, was taken in, was raped, perhaps, perhaps not. Number two, she is dancing in a beauty contest at 8 00 in the morning and i saw the tapes and i see the big smile on her face and shes dancing happily at 8 00 in the morning. Trevor well, it looks like encyclopedi ....

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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20160505

Around him. Trevor thats right, people. Take a second and breathe that in. Because american politics has just entered a whole new world. Just like the one aladdin and jasmine saning about. Except, except they cant come because theyre muslim. laughter and onced news of trump broke out, the people in the streets didnt take it well. Elephants are like i cant even vote, im getting out of here. But yes, its all official. All but official, really, after winning indiana done all trump will be the republican nominee for president. And trump didnt just win last night. He won so hard, he made ted cruz look human. And so with a heavy heart, but with boundless optimism for the longterm future of our nation, we are suspending our campaign. No trevor yay . Is this aiay . Im so conflicted. I mean ted cruz lost, but because donald trump won. Its like finding out your herpes is gone but its because your dick fell off. It was a really bad night for ted cruz. And as painful as dropping out was on him, it ....

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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20160506

Youve just come out of a coma, go back to sleep. Dont want to see this. A lot of people say he needs to appeal to latino voters. Trump had a plan all along. Mr. Trump tweeted from his desk at trump tower, happy cinco de mayo, the best taco bowls are made in trump tower grill, i love hispanics, and there is a picture of him eating a taco bowl, looks like. Trevor well played, donald well played applause i just love the idea that in Donald Trumps mind, hes just cleared up this entire mess. They bring in the drugs, theyre rapists, the wall, taco bowl. Huh . Are we good now . laughter in all fairness, i can see why trump like taco bowls. A pile of cheesy slop stuffed inside a thin orange shell. I get it. And while were talking about republicans and food, yesterday, we hardly, hardly got to mention this after only one primary victory, john kasich ended his long shot candidacy saying the politics of anger overcame his positive message. Tr ....

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Transcripts For KCCI CBS Evening News 20151213

Slipping, he dismissed it as bias. Im leading in virtd allly every state. Im leading in iowa although Des Moines Register does the poll and im sure that will be negative. Reporter that poll was conducted by one of the states most respected and accurate pollster, it has ted cruz surging. Senator cruz has spent months courting the voters with whom he is now leading. Evangelicals and tea party conservatives. Hes capturing supporters fleeing ben carson who has faltered with the increased focus on national security. You look at the which hes dealt with the senate where he goases in there like a you know, frankly like a little of a maniac. Reporter in the fox news interview the billionaire frontrunner says cruz doesnt have the right temperment to be president. But the poll of Iowa Republicans has the texas senator leading on that quality. On sunday trump enthusiasticically t ....

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