A guy can dream, said trump, with his two projectiles [ laughter ] reporters have found that a doctored version of the president ial seal was projected behind President Trump at an event earlier this week, which featured a twoheaded Russian Eagle clutching a set of golf clubs and a banner reading 45 is a puppet in spanish. [ laughter ] hmm. Somebody doesnt like trump and also speaks spanish . Busted [ laughter and applause according to reports, Rudy Guiliani is serving as President Trumps lawyer for free well, i think we can all agree he is worth every penny. [ laughter and applause thats right guiliani is serving as trumps lawyer for free. Well, actually, what trump said is, you can bill me all you want but i am never going to pay you. [ laughter and applause according to Campaign Finance records, indiana mayor, Pete Buttigieg has spent 300,000 on private plane travel, while Bernie Sanders just asked Spirit Airlines if they have a punch card [ laughter and applause every tenth flight
From comedy centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with trevor noah. cheers and applause trevor welcome to the daily show, everybody thank you so much for tuning in thank you for coming out im trevor noah our guest tonight is a a former daily show correspondent, now appearing in the rook on starz olivia munn is joining us. Olivia munn is joining us, everybody cheers and applause but before that, weve got to get into the news. Lets be honest, for the past few days, weve mainly been focused on three stories, america versus iran, Migrant Children at the border, and the latest supersmash brothers release, the democratic primary race. laughter yes. My favorite move is the joe biden death mas sabling. Even though those are the main stories, there are tons of other stories happening in the news. The truth is we just dont have the time to talk about them. Luckily, not enough time is just the right amount of time for a segment we call aint nobody got time for that.
Okay. Hi, everybody. Were back. So pretty much theyre [bleep], and they would hear screams from george layhe. Help, im gonna die. John is like, george, everythings gonna be fine. Justjust keep your chin up. Literally. Hes like, thats a terrible thing to say. And he [bleep] drowned in this shit. Takes everyone four hours trying to save them. 21 people drowned. 150 people were injured because of this, and the next day, john barrys hair turned completely white, and the people, they were trying to say, like, okay, whos to blame . Is thisi burped while i said this. Whos to blame . And of course theyre just like, pfft, not us. [chuckles] good night, everybody. [blows raspberry] the cleanup took 87,000 man hours. The harbor for six months was just brown with molasses, so even to this day on a really hot day the people still claim that they can smell molasses in boston. It [bleep] boston up. Arthur jell did not get fired. Arthur jell got promoted. That guy had a great [bleep] life while other