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COM The Colbert Report January 15, 2014

Stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, steveen, stephen thank you, ladies and gentlemen, good to have you with us. In here, out there, all around the world, stuff. You watch the show. I certainly hope that you do. Because you one thing i said over and over again is that i love West Virginia. It is my favorite of the directional virginias. Step it up, eastern south. Thats right, folks. I was so concerned when the liberal media made a big stink out of a merely large stink. Jim . Some 300,000 people in West Virginia are facing now a fifth day without tap water after a Chemical Spill contaminated their water supply. The only appropriate use is toilet flushing. So flushing your commode would be appropriate but dont make baby formula with it, dont brush your teeth with it, dont wash with it, dont sh ....

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COM The Colbert Report January 14, 2014

Cheers and applause thank you, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the report. Good to see you be everybody, good to have you with us. Stephen, stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, steveen, stephen thank you, ladies and gentlemen, good to have you with us. In here, out there, all around the world, stuff. You watch the show. I certainly hope that you do. Because you one thing i said over and over again is that i love West Virginia. It is my favorite of the directional virginias. Step it up, eastern south. Thats right, folks. I was so concerned when the liberal media made a big stink out of a merely large stink. Jim . Some 300,000 people in West Virginia are facing now a fifth day without tap water after a Chemical Spill contaminated their water supply. The only appropriate use ....

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COM The Colbert Report February 12, 2013

Old and brittle, that it wouldnt even be a challenge at this age. Thats why i decided to do the next best thing and arm wrestle the kid who played his son in over the top. Michael hawk. Ready . Turn your hat around. Set go you got it, you got it. You got it oh [laughter] im a lot like tim tebow. I had a great run, but we all know im not ready for the pros. [laughter] tune in next week for our first ever web reunion with alan thicke and the crystal light dancers. 23 years they had been apart. I brought them back together. What have you done . [laughter] make sure you follow me on twitter so we can live chat during the shows. Check out my tour schedule and make sure you keep up with our daily blog at comedycentral. Com tosh. O. And on that blog, i will make sure to have a link so you can see that unblurred man meat. [laughter] and finally, avatar has made over a billion dollars. I wouldnt mind a taste of that sweet action, so i thought id translated our closing credits into navi and made ....

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COM The Colbert Report January 20, 2014

Coming to my office. The new ford 5150 is made of 97 aluminum which means its lighter but you cant put it in the microwave. This is the colbert report. Captioning sponsored by Comedy Central cheers and applause thank you, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the report. Good to see you be everybody, good to have you with us. Stephen, stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, stephen, stephen stephen, steveen, stephen thank you, ladies and gentlemen, good to have you with us. In here, out there, all around the world, stuff. You watch the show. I certainly hope that you do. Because you one thing i said over and over again is that i love West Virginia. It is my favorite of the directional virginias. Step it up, eastern south. Thats right, folks. I was so concerned when the liberal media made a big stink out of a merely large stink. Jim . Some 300,000 people in
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COM The Colbert Report February 5, 2013

Jon thats our show. Here it is your moment of zen the 500yearold skeleton they found near a parking lot belonged to the notorious monarch richard iii. A scientist said an apparent knife wound in his rear end fits the story. Sta captioning sponsored by com stephen tonight, the gop tries to appeal to hispanics. First step, learning to speak hisspanish. [ laughter ] then, can president obama get the support of gun owners . Yes, after a fouryear waiting period. [ laughter ] and my guest, Justice Sonia sotomayor, is the first hispanic on the Supreme Court. I will ask her questions in hissspanish. [ laughter ] fidel castro made his first public appearance in three years. Then he saw his shadow, so fifty more years of communism. [cheers and applause] this is the colbert report. [cheers and applause] [the colbert report theme music playing] captioning sponsored by
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