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THAT damned intro music keeps playing in my head. You know the one. It crashes in with a loud "Dah dah di-dah daah!" of joyful abandon before shifting into the mesmeric, shuffling Calypso lilt which has become the ultimate earworm at Hammond Towers, littered, as it is, by two teenage girls who love their telly. In their formative years, they discovered Death In Paradise in their endless pursuit of nonsense to watch, and ever since, they have become devoted fans of that daft but entertaining murder mystery show set on a glorious Caribbean island (the series is actually filmed on Guadaloupe, just 'up from the road' from where we now settle for the first cold one of the trip). Lordy, how that first one after a long flight hits the spot, no? We have landed, at last, on the wonder island of St Kitts. The girls are now 18 and 16 and still every bit as enthused by Death In Paradise as the next Hercule Poirot might be. Everywhere we go, that music chugs along in my little b ....

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