That was the one that was the one, that was the one this ones from torlumis9 she said, expelled my kid from home school. Well, i think thats pretty common right now thats a good one. This is from moonanawbit1. She said, very close to befriending a volleyball my quarantine in six words this ones from mike t. Barrett. Says funyuns for dinner okay, breakfast too. Oh, this ones from gumgummerson. We love gumgummerson. Always sends us things thank you, gum. gumgummerson says, toilet paper is our god now. [ laughter ] i should say thank you to our, my camera operator my wife nancy. Thank you, nancy for being there and not laughing youre welcome. Jimmy not one joke, here we go that was the one, that was the one this ones from ryan labarge it says, is seven hot pockets too many the answer is no seven hot pockets is not too many this is from susan pickover. This says, this ends in divorce or murder come on now. Come on, now thats very funny. This ones from elcaptainsaucy. Oh, this is great. It
And prone to panic in third. And here comes does this cough mean anything . Does this cough mean anything on the outside track. And whats this . Charging from the back of the pack, maybe this will all just blow over coming on strong. Maybe this will all just blow over challenging for the lead. Oh, maybe this will all just blow over has bucked its rider and is running the other way. And its generalized anxiety by three lengths. Generalized anxiety takes the roses. Though its probably allergic. From all of me at churchill downs, im going to need another mint julep. Its a late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, cancel culture governor Chris Christie and musical guest nathaniel with jon batiste and stay homin. And now live on tape from a safe distance, its Stephen Colbert stephen oh, hi. Welcome to my perch up in the breeze. On monday, it was water. Yesterday, it was fire. So today, its the light show with stephen colbair. Im also up here among the trees, because i read on facebook that v
Avengers and is the star of the Netflix Original altered carbon, Anthony Mackie is joining us, everybody also, Bernie Sanders is the new king of the democrats, the crossover is going on tour, and donald trump tries to pronounce indian words. Lets catch up on todays headlines. Lets kick things off with the royal family. Theyre like the kardashians but less welcoming to black people. Its been a month since harry and meghan announced they wanted to leave the family, and now theyre told theyre free to go but have to leave their name tags behind. Harry and meghan will be royals no more at least publicly. They released at the tails of stepping down with the royal duties, with the agreement the queen not use royal in any more philanthropic or commercial pursuits. They will no longer be able to use their royal titles after march 31. Trevor damn ham harry and meghan are losing their titles . Thats the most embarrassing loss thins williams hairline. laughter but, yes, the queen announced harry a
Tonight, join jimmy and his guests john mulaney bad bunny, musical guest bad bunny and sech and featurinthe legendary roots crew questlove 1214 steve and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause [ cheers and applause jimmy hi, everyone welcome. Thank you so much, everybody welcome, welcome, welcome to the tonight show. This is it youre here. [ cheers and applause i love it what a crowd thank you so much for being here seriously, whats better than sitting next to 300 people during a worldwide pandemic . Am i right [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause well, last night, President Trump held a press conference to ease fears about the coronavirus. And after he was done, everyone in america breathed a huge sigh of panic [ laughter ] the big news is that trump picked mike pence to lead the governments response to the coronavirus. [ laughter ] trump said he chose pence because he has a certain talent for this [ laughter ] and that talent is always looking like a guy who is holding his
Trevor welcome to the daily show, everybody thank you so much for tuning in thank you for coming out cheers and applause wow this is great thank you thank you thank you take a seat, everybody lets do in thing, im trevor noah our guest tonight is an author and activist whose new book is called hood feminism Mikki Kendall is joining us cheers and applause also on tonights show, joe biden makes a sphriez surprising friend. Jaboukie youngwhite tells us how to stop corona and donald trump might actually be a genius. Lets catch up on todays headlines. Lets kick it off with the democratic primary race. As i like to call it too old, too furious. laughter its down to Bernie Sanders and joe biden, and tomorrow could be the day we find out whos going all the way. Former Vice President joe biden and senator Bernie Sanders are both in michigan today ahead of tomorrows president ial contest. Six states will hold votes for 352 the delegates. Of those, michigan is the big prize, the most delegates, 12