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Dear How to Do It, I have been in a relationship now for about a year. Mostly things are great: We look at life the same way, and we both enjoy sex a lot. He is sensitive in bed and also rough when I need him to be and we are really getting to know each other’s preferences and growing closer. But we’re also having sex less and less, and this is because I have started to see it as a chore. Advertisement This has entirely to do with the length of our sexual encounters. While I personally enjoy a variation of long Sunday mornings as well as the in between quick moments of closeness on, say, a Thursday night, he only seems to know long, longer, or longest varying from at least 45 minutes for a requested quicky (I’ve timed it) to about four hours. And this is literally the penetrative part I’ve excluded the foreplay from this “timer.” I’m starting to find it incredibly dull and am going through to-do lists while I’m in bed (or on the couch, floor, etc.) with ....
Dear How to Do It, I just got to have a sexual experience with a guy I’ve been desiring for a long time, and it was such a disappointment. He could not penetrate me. We tried all kinds of positions. We are both big but not obese, and he has a big “beer” belly. He kept telling me to relax, but I was relaxed. I wanted him. I was well-lubricated my panties were soaked. I am in my early 50s and never had children. The few sexual partners I have had never had a problem like this. I have used dildos without problems. My overall impression was that he was “short,” but he left me feeling like I was the problem, that I was too tight. I have not been having a lot of sex but masturbate regularly and enjoy the “penetration” part of it. This is definitely a sexual relationship, and I don’t see it going on if the encounters continue in this manner. Is there something I could do to not be so tight? ....